He doesn't even care :(

[thegirl_00]

I broke up with my boyfriend 4 days ago because i found out he cheated on me. I dont really want to explain what happened because it really makes me upset. Well iv only been able to manage going one day NC and and hard because we have ALL the same friends and we were both at the same bar yesterday with our friends. But anyways, i did REALLY good and didnt talk to him once all night even though i was sitting right next to him.

 

Now I thought that not talking to him would make him upset and make him miss me because he told everyone that he cries over me every single night and misses me like crazy. But i just found out this morning that hes "already moving on" and that he's already getting over me.

 

I'm finding this a little hard to believe after only 4 days and keep in mind we went out for 10 months. I know that he was sad right when we broke up because I saw him cry. I thought that because I broke up with him and after all the pain he put me through he'd be the one to suffer in the long run guess not....

[annie24]

I think NC is definitely the way to go. Stay away from the areas you both go to. tell your mutual friends you don't want updates on him. maybe meet some new people and find new places to go out to.

 

I am so sorry. but, maybe he was not the right guy for you. he cheated. blah. who needs new germs?

[locolady]

hi sweetie - i know this hurts like hell right now, i was in your position last year, we had been together 4 years when he threw it all away with a one night stand. I was devastated, just like you are.

 

Its so recent and the pain is so raw, just let yourself cry for a bit, you did great last night not talking to him but maybe give yourself a break for a few nights, dont go out, get some friends to come round and just let yourself be sad. Take as much time out from him as you can - when we feel so hurt, so betrayed and angry, we dont behave in a rational, dignified manner - so try to wait until you can hold yourself together before you talk to him (if indeed you want to at all) i know i made things much worse for myself by screaming and crying in front of my ex!

 

Youve held your head high and said you will not tolerate cheating, that you should be proud of - its not easy to end a relationship you want but you have self-respect and know that you deserve better. good for you! i know that seems now like cutting your nose off to spite your face but i promise it will be something you will be proud of later on.....you deserve much better - and you will get it.

 

You will hear this over and over again but its the only truth really.....spend some time thinking about what makes you happy, what you enjoy doing and try to do it - stay busy and try your hardest to get on with life.....not only will he see what a fool he is to throw away a strong, confident, courageous girl, but you will also take strength from yourself and begin to be happy on your own again.

 

There are hundreds of useful posts on here about healing your broken heart so keep browsing and [posting and we will all help as much as we can.

 

Remember that you have done nothing wrong, that you couldnt have done anyting to stop him cheating - dont go down the road i have done and begin to hate yourself, you are wonderful and honest and capable of real love....that is why you feel pain when someone lets you down.....you will get what you deserve one day, keep believing that.

 

Good luck

 

hugs

[Meow18]

Whether he's moved on or not, you need to be moving on from him.

 

It would really be in your best interest to let your friends know that you don't want to hang out with him anytime soon. And you don't want to hear about him. If they are real friends, they will understand and make time to see you without him.

 

It's always hard, especially in your situation because you didn't break up with him because you lost feelings for him. You broke up with him because you deserved better than what he did.. and that will take some time to get through.

 

Just hang in there and you know you always have us to talk to!

[Mythical_Suicide]

Hunny, he cheated while y'all were together and you're shocked that he has "moved on" so quickly?

I know it's hard to deal with but you will be much better off getting away from this guy who doesnt deserve you. If he did respect you and care for yiou he never would have cheated in the first place. No contact is the way to move on, I know it seems so promising for him to say "I cry every night over you and blah blah blah" But in all honesty he should have thought about that before he cheated. So pick your head up and find someone who is worthy of your love and who will love you back without cheating on you.

[shikashika]

that sucks!!

 

your friends will surely understand.

 

lets just say you and your ex were in my group of friends.

 

if i find out that my dear friend, thegirl_20 had a boyfriend who i was also friends with, and he cheated on my friend, thegirl_20 i certainly would help her out ensuring that cheating-jerk boy isn't invited to one of our soirees.

 

good on you for acting mature about it!

[thegirl_00]

thanx you guys. No, my friends are being really understanding and are my main cause for being so strong. They have a close eye on me to make sure I don't talk to him, but I broke my one day of NC this morning and talked to him on msn. But I learnt from my mistake as I found that it just made all the anger come back.

 

He's having a party tonight and he wants me and all my friends to go, but my friends refuse and are going to stick with me tonight, so we'll see just how well his party turns out.... lol. I even have all these guys already calling me, but to be honest it makes me SOOO sick to my stomach because I just feel like all guys are dogs

[stunned]

thegirl_20,

 

Hang in there. You'll be on a bit of a rollercoaster for quite a while, especially during the holiday season. Reach out to your friends and family and this board when you're sad and depressed. Take each day as it comes. The hardest thing we all have to cope with is rebuilding trust in others. That will be hard to do, but try not to let your anger and negative feelings overwhelm you. Anger and negative emotions can be so stressful to your body and psyche. Focus on yourself during this healing period. Pamper and love yourself. We're here for you thegirl_20.