Had Dinner with my ex Saturday

[downbroken]

I have an update on my situation with my ex. It has been over a week now since I left her a letter telling her exactly how I feel. I got a good response from her. So last week my son and his soccer team had a party to which my ex invited me to. When I got there I was greeted by her whole family in a very nice and warm way. I went and sat down by my ex. The night started off with just small talk. But as the night went on we begin to talk more and even joked around with each other. We even started to jokingly fight over candy since we both like the same kind. It was just like old times. After that the kids had a small presentation in a different room. I got up and went to the room and leaned on the wall. My ex followed me in and got right next to me and even leaned on me a little. When it was over I helped her and everyone clean up. So the night came to an end.

 

Now fast forward a couple of days. I took a chance and ask her if I could take her and the kids to lunch on Saturday before she leaves out of town for Thanksgiving. She said yes and for me to call her that day so we could set a time. So Saturday came along and I called. She told me that she was at the store and I could meet them there. I showed up and just like that I started shopping with them, again just like old times. After that we left and it started to get late. I knew that she had a lot of packing to do. So I told her if she wanted to save it for another day. She said no and that she had plenty of time. We decided on a restaurant and I told her that I would meet her there. To which she said. "Why don't you just go with me? It is pointless to take two cars." So we went and eat and had a good time. We talked about everything and basically just caught up with each other. Never once did either of us mention the past or our relationship. We had a really good time. After dinner she took me to my car and thanked me. At time I freaked I did know what to do. So I just leaned over and gave her a hug and wished her a safe trip.

 

I feel really good about all this. I just wanted to hear what you guys think of this. Since you guys have been so helpful to me in the past. I do have one question. What should I do from here? She is out of town for a week. Should I keep making contact with her? I want her to know that I am here for her. But I don't want to smoother or rush her in anyway. What should I do?

Again thank for reading.

 

 

D&B

[Dako]

What do you want from her? Friendship or reconciliation?

Your post rings with longing for the past, and if it's over, I'm afraid you maybe torturing each other. Being upfront with your desires may save you both a second letdown, or rekindle something, but vague signals can set you up for more pain.

 

Ask her if there's a chance, and then deal with it.

[SuperDave71]

Down and Broken,

 

 

No one but no one can answer your question. YOU have to decide what you want and develope a plan of action based on your decision. You must sit down and evaluate all the pro and cons of this once relationship.

 

 

Answer your own question by asking yourself what happened in the first place and what has been done on you part to fix it. Can you demonstrate to her that you have changed for the better? Do you even want her back? If you did have her back, what would you do different? Do you think she can love you the way you love her?

 

 

THESE are just some of teh many questions you need to figure out before you can develope a plan. I wish you well and I hope you find what you are looking for....

 

 

 

 

Take care my friend,

 

 

 

SuperDave71

[downbroken]

Yes, I am looking for reconciliation. After the letter she told me that there was a chance. That is the only reason that I even invited her to dinner. Before this I had as little contact with her as possible. During that time I became a stronger person. That is why I'm feeling comfortable putting myself out there.

[Dako]

Good going!

I hope this works out for you two.

[chai714]

No need to contact her while she's out of town. Keep your life busy and diversify your sources of happiness. She won't ever appreciate you if she finds you to be the guy that will always be there for her - instead, she'll take you for granted. This is not a stereotype, but rather human nature.

 

Keep your butt busy and be a man about this - quit seeking her approval. Next time you see her, bust a move.

[downbroken]

Great advice. Thanks everyone. Thank you superdave I will ask myself those questions before I do anything else. And I am going to call her at least a couple of times this week. So I can talk to my son.

[MessedUpInHead]

Wow, good luck to you!