I keep checking up on him

[soulsista29]

My ex and I broke up about 10 months ago. The first few months were hard. I did not talk to him at all. I talked to him maybe 2 times on MSN messenger in the first couple of months after we broke up. I got over him. I dont want him back.

The problem is that a couple of weeks ago I was on MSN and saw he had updated his blog so I decided to check it out. I found out that he had a new girlfriend. I was a little jealous. And then I had this feeling like we had just broken up the day before. I was depressed, upset.

And just then I looked up his profile in Friendster and I saw a photo of both of them together. Why am I doing this?

Why am I upset? Dont know. I mean I dont want him back. I deserve better. He was my first boyffriend and we had a 4 yr relationship. I guess Im just angry at myself that I am unable to move on and he is able to move on so easily. I havent felt like Im ready to date again just yet. Im not ready. I guess its just me and I dont know what I really want which is a good thing, right?

So whats wrong with me? Do I still like him? How can I get 100% over him?

[herbal]

Every one feels bad wen after its over the other party seems to have moved on n u have not,in your case i think the best thing is to keep away from anything that would remind you of him,if u dont want him back then u have no business checking out his life style etc.

U r upset coz u want him to care for u again,which will not happen since its over so plainly JUST FORGET ABOUT HIM and stay away from places u mught get ant info about him.

[Vynde]

Hi soulsista29,

 

I'm relatively new to this forum, but most of the people in here can in some form or another relate to the feelings you're having over your ex.

 

Im probably not stable enough to give you the best advice, but there are many others that troll these posts who can.

 

I know with my situation, I try my hardest not to look at those things (i.e Myspace, Facebook, Blogs) or anything else that might give you a glimpse into their lives.

 

I know from what people have told me in here, that the feelings you are having are normal..and there is nothing wrong with you. Your upset because at one time, he meant a lot to you, and maybe still does, but as the old saying goes time will eventually heal.

 

As far as dating, if you don't think you feel ready, I would say your probably not. That's not to say you should close out the idea all together.. but instead take things slow, and very carefully..

 

I wish you luck and hope you feel better soon, In the meantime, continue to post here, I know for me it has helped a great deal. The people in here are great and care!

 

Good Luck!

 

((((HUG))))

 

John

[arwen]

Hey Soulsista,

 

It is very common to feel this way when you first learn your ex moved on to another partner. It's natural to be jealous, I think you are not jealous of HER but of HIM (being able to find someone earlier than you did).

 

The only advice I can give you is the advice you'd probably give to yourself as well. Delete your browsers history, your cookies, etc., install enotalone as a favorite page or bookmark in your toolbar (if you use mozilla you can just log in by one click), and log in here every time you feel the urge to check his friendster profile.

 

Do you have anything else to do on friendster? Do you have a profile yourself there? If so, I'd just delete it and start another page or maybe just a blog.

 

It might even be easier to do something entirely different if you feel like looking him up. Something that doesn't involve the internet, but makes you feel great. Go out for a coffee with a friend you haven't seen in a while, do the things you didn't have the time or opportunity for when you were together with the ex. You will soon re-find that feeling of having moved on. Don't LET this set you back in the past. The way I read it from your post, you did a great job moving on, and him having a gf is not making your own progress lesser.

 

Ilse

[annie24]

I agree with the other posters. and ilse has some great tips. definitely stop reading his blog, facebook. it just brings more heartache. if you get tempted to, come here, or to a different website, like the news or sports, or whatever you are into. And I think ilse may have a point... sometimes we can get jealous more of the fact that they found someone else while you are still single. if you had a hot, awesome boyfriend, you would probably not care about your ex's new gf.