I seriously NEED HELP~ (I'm unexperienced)

[Elisette]

Hey friends, I'll start by introducing myself, I'm Elisette i'm 15 and i live here in Denver Colorado. Well I've been through alot of problems with older guys (over 17) because I have only dated older guys.

As I posted earlier i got into a BIG problem with a guy that was already married and as i recovered from that problem emotionally I decided to give myself another chance but this time i would start all over again by dating young guys my age, BUT Oh My God that is such a drastic change, the young guys hardly say what a girl wants to hear unlike the older ones that say "I love you" the first night they meet you only to get inside your pants. But to make matters worse this guy I'm dating is young PLUS unexperienced, so it is very hard for me to feel good and act his way if we have so many different ponits of view.But my problem right now is that I'm going out with this guy his name is Martin and he's only 16 he has only been going out with 3 girls, he's very shy, his relations only lasted 2-3 months, and he's a very down to earth guy (so he only says what he feels). We started dating on September 7 so we've only been going out for 2 months and we are having problems lately becuase of so many rumors going around and he gets mad at me because I later want to talk to him about what i heard and he starts telling me i should trust him. And i do because he's a very nice guy and also very honest, but a week ago i was talking to him and i'm always used to ask him playfully "how much do u like me??" and he usually answered "alot gurl!" but last week i asked and to my surprise he said "i dont know" and i felt really bad as soon as i heard that, then i asked again and he said he was confused and he needed time to get his feelings straightended out because he was very confused and it was all because of our differences and that i did not trust him. Then the next day i called him and he answered; we talked and decided to give each other a second chance and right now i dont know if it will work out but for the moment everything is going just fine BUT I feel really bad because i really cant tell if he's like that because he dont like me or because he's unexperienced, i mean he tells me that he has never said "I love you" to a girl because he bieleves love is when you are willing to do anything impossible for that person. He's a very honest, sweet, and nice guy, and i think i already fell in love for him and it would hurt me if we broke up so i wanna know what yall friends think because I REALLY NEED ADVICES OR OPINIONS PLEASE ANSWER ME IF YOU CAN!!!!!!!!!!

[InaneCathode]

Quit trying to gain approval from guys and learn to love yourself.

 

I live in Colorado myself, mountains.

[Momene]

I have a daughter just turned 16, so can shed a bit of light on this. Firstly, I wouldn't say "older guys do this" or "younger guys do that". Believe me, there are 15 year old boys who are very experienced in relationships and 40 year olds that don't have a clue. Whilst I'm way of my daughter dating "older guys", I'd feel more comfortable if she were dating a 20 year old virgin than a 16 year old with a trail of unwanted pregnancies.

 

I'm afraid some boys and men who really should know better will tell you what you want to hear for all the wrong reasons. Martin at least seems honest.

 

Other thing is, you're 15 and dating, great. You will date some jerks and a lot of boys who are good but not really quite right for you long term. You don't have to meet your life partner in the next 5 minutes. I was nearly 34 when I met my wife.

 

Good luck.

[wayne]

It sucks being your age in this country.

 

The only older guys that will date you are the ones reckless enough to ignore the law. They're generally not good boyfriend material, and people willing to disregard one law might be willing to disregard other laws... such as those against threatening, injuring, or even killing people.

 

Guys your age are clueless. They're not actually stupid, they're just badly educated. They're also not good boyfriend material.

 

You've been badly educated too. Those endless summers you had off from school don't seem so nice when you're 15 and still have to be a kid.

 

And you've got three more years of this crap. I'd try reading to fill up the endless hours. Maybe studying so you can graduate early, go to college, and meet smarter and more clueful guys. Or just reading to improve your mind so you'll do better when you're finally turned loose at 18 to start your real education.

[Momene]

Maybe SOME older guys who aren't sexually experienced themselves will date younger girls, as they're intimidated by experienced girls of their own age.

 

Also, I thought that the age of consent was 18 in some states but lower in others. In England, it is 16 country-wide. Also I've seen some posts on here that suggest that liquor laws are more strictly enforced in the US.

 

As a dad of a 16-year-old girl, I'd naturally feel worried about her dating a much older guy but would also worry about her dating a jerk of comparable age.

[Elisette]

we already broke up

[Budman]

Elisette, I have one thing to ask of you,

 

Instead of focusing on "marriage" focus on enjoying the relationship.

 

You seemed to focused on "having it work out" and less focused on enjoying each others company.

 

My fiance and I when we met we were not looking for Husband or wife (I was looking for a wife perse, but not with her for reasons I won't go into). Anyway, you personally need to gain some love for yourself. You need to be ok with being single, and be ok with you.