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I am doing it to night


lmtyler
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What is your plan?

 

I quit my job 5 years ago to take care of my moher while she was dying. Two weeks after she died my sister told me that my mother hated me and always had. Then my father got sick and I have been taking care of him. He is diabetic and had his leg amputed 6 months ago and it still isn't healed. Now my sister has kicked me out of my fathers house and I have no job no money and no place to go

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Oh this is so difficult to hear, I am so sorry, you have been through so much, and I know you are so low right now, but the only way is up from here... you have the courage to take this new setback on after all you have been through... go anywhere, even if you don't have one religious bone in your body, go to a church tell them what's happened in your life, they will give you shelter and a help you get a new start... you can do this after all the strength you have shown getting to this point, sometimes we just have to hit the bottom to find our way up..don't you agree?.

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well, you're family may not like you, and I'm so sorry that your sister was so immature and uncaring to tell you that your mother felt a certain way, but that does not change the fact that you did take care of her, that is commendable...and if your family doesn't like, it hurts, but that's okay. For today, you are in a really bad emotional place, and that's just right now, but you have a courage, you do, you are not a coward, you've had some hard knocks, maybe you made some choices you regret, but YOU are still here... someone loves you, even it's just a "higher power" because you are still here and that means there is always options and YOU derseve to seek them out... what would you like to do or where would you be if you could snap your fingers and be there?? What are YOUR dreams?

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Oh this is so difficult to hear, I am so sorry, you have been through so much, and I know you are so low right now, but the only way is up from here... you have the courage to take this new setback on after all you have been through... go anywhere, even if you don't have one religious bone in your body, go to a church tell them what's happened in your life, they will give you shelter and a help you get a new start... you can do this after all the strength you have shown getting to this point, sometimes we just have to hit the bottom to find our way up..don't you agree?.

I have been at the bottom for years. Churches are just a buncg of hypicrites. My dad is the president of his church and my sister is the church secretery and look how they treat their own family

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Oh this is so difficult to hear, I am so sorry, you have been through so much, and I know you are so low right now, but the only way is up from here... you have the courage to take this new setback on after all you have been through... go anywhere, even if you don't have one religious bone in your body, go to a church tell them what's happened in your life, they will give you shelter and a help you get a new start... you can do this after all the strength you have shown getting to this point, sometimes we just have to hit the bottom to find our way up..don't you agree?.

If I could be anywhere I would snap my fingers and be in heaven with my mother. I have no dreams anymore

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Oh, I feel for you, I can feel your sadness... I know what you are saying about churches, (there's a lot of insincerity out there, you're right about that) but God won't let you down, if you pick yourself up..

 

at least give yourself a chance...that is what your mother would want for you...

 

you have an opportunity here to prove everyone wrong and rise above this a little at a time...YOU have the potential to have the strength to honor your mother's memory and live FOR HER...

 

you can painfully and carefully pick yourself up, even if it's just to "counter level" for now, just a little... and drag yourself to where you can make it one more day, one day at a time, walk into an AA meeting, even if you are not an alcoholic, walk in, go up to someone and say, "I'm thinking of ending it, and need someone to talk to".. you can find these meetings by calling information for AA or look on the internet and it will tell you of a meeting right near you, you'll be in a room with people who have overcome the deepest darkest lows..and they will understand your pain.. they will, would you consider trying this?

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Seeing as it is your father's house and you were primary carer of both parents for 5 years, does she have any legal right to kick you out? It may or may not give you legal rights to stay in the home. I think you should seek legal advise before doing any thing drastic.

 

I'm interested to know why she kicked you out after you have given up 5 long hard years of your life? This just doesn't seem fair or right to me.

 

Seek legal advice... There is always something to live for,to fight for.

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Ending it thats such a selfish act you know? why would you want to hurt your family and friends for? I am not telling you not to do it, its your coice and no one can change that, but i just dont know why you would want to hurt your loved ones? some of them may even get depression, would you want them to feel like yo do right now? Befor you do end your life please just think about it, why not talk change the date till next week and talk to all of as here first. well its your choice but please make the right one

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It always darkest before the dawn.

 

Knowing that you can end it gives you power but actually doing it - makes you powerless.

 

Hang in there man, you'll get through this and the day will come when you will thank your lucky stars that did. I can guarentee this.

 

 

"I like living. I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable, racked with sorrow, but through it all I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing."

Agatha Christie

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Ending it thats such a selfish act you know? why would you want to hurt your family and friends for? I am not telling you not to do it, its your coice and no one can change that, but i just dont know why you would want to hurt your loved ones? some of them may even get depression, would you want them to feel like yo do right now? Befor you do end your life please just think about it, why not talk change the date till next week and talk to all of as here first. well its your choice but please make the right one
What about the years of hurt and pain they have caused me. I can never remember a christmas of thanksgiving that i didn't go to bed without crying. Now I have no where to live and i am on the streets and they could not be happier. Not wanting to hurt them woule be the last reason that would stop me. I know that they would be very happy if I did it. If fact there is nothing that would make them happier
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Seeing as it is your father's house and you were primary carer of both parents for 5 years, does she have any legal right to kick you out? It may or may not give you legal rights to stay in the home. I think you should seek legal advise before doing any thing drastic.

 

I'm interested to know why she kicked you out after you have given up 5 long hard years of your life? This just doesn't seem fair or right to me.

 

Seek legal advice... There is always something to live for,to fight for.

She has power of attorney and can do whatever she wants. She kicked me out so that she can get my dad to write me out of his will. She has already gotten him to write my brother out so how she gets everything and he will be dead in six months. He is diabetic and there is no one there to fix his meals. He has foot ulcers and there is no one there to do his dressings. He will be dead and she will have everything.
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okay, you're a strong person, you've been through so much, we can not choose our families, but we can choose how we respond to them, and this sister of yours, well she speaks a different emotional language than you, and will never fully understand you.. so let go of her, them, and put your Dad in god's hands... your mother will watch over him from heaven, trust this, and make her proud, pick yourself up,

 

go into an AA meeting, that is a room full of people who have no place to go, kicked out of thier own homes, facing there own issues, and making an effort to gain a new life, YOU deserve the same... Even if you do NOT have a drinking problem, someone, anyone in a meeting will be willing to "help you help yourself"... You can do this, no more being a victim to your family, that is over, you are stopping that right now, by making a choice to put one painful foot in front of the other and be a hero.. and prove them all wrong, by not "ending it" but by "beginning a new life against all odds"...

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Every xmas night i always go to bed crying aswell, i cry myself to sleep every night but what is killing yourself going to do? NOTHING. I have tried to end mylife but all i did was hurt everyone around me

 

What about the years of hurt and pain they have caused me. I can never remember a christmas of thanksgiving that i didn't go to bed without crying. Now I have no where to live and i am on the streets and they could not be happier. Not wanting to hurt them woule be the last reason that would stop me. I know that they would be very happy if I did it. If fact there is nothing that would make them happier
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Take it from someone who lost a very dear friend to suicide... it is not worth it, think, you have the rest of your life, you can still make things go up from here. You could turn your life around, it could be a life that you've always wanted. You have no one holding you back at all.

 

People will mourn your death. Believe me. I hope you change your mind about this. I truly do.

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You came have come, hold back the knife until we have jad time to help,

Why is your own blood doing this to you and your brothers,

 

facts thats whats needed here facts, the why, how and what,

 

I have siad here many many times

 

Be like me and stand when others would fall.

 

This is the time and place, this is where you stand when all the world is telling you to fall. It dos not matter if you win or lose what matters is the standing and fighting for whats right.

 

If yours sisters aim is just welth and greed at your expence then do not stand for it. Make as much nouse as you can,

 

Shame her into doing whats right, shes in a charch, print plyers and hand them out at her meetings, tell EVRY ONE! whats shes doing, do see the clocal papaers and tell them, they will love this stuff, right to tv

 

shame thats your best tool here

 

let me know how you get

 

 

"If I could be anywhere I would snap my fingers and be in heaven with my mother. I have no dreams anymore"

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Please don't harm yourself, because I care about every living human. I know what it's like to be suicaidal, I get that way every few months or so. You have reasons to not want to live, but think of reasons to live. If I was you I'd move into a mental hospital until I get back on my feet. They can help you feel better, give you food and shelter, and you can make caring friends. I'm too young to check myself into a center, but I plan to once I turn 18 and still have problems. I've been in a metal hospital due to my schozophrenia a couple times, and I always had fun in them. Please, think of the kind people like me who care about you, don't think of your fmaily. I hate my family, and have good reason to. Both my parents are alcoholics and drug users and they both swear all the time. I hate seeing people do such bad things, even to myself, but it's no reason to end your life. I wish I could meet you in person to help you, but that won't be possible. The only help I can offer is my words, and I hope they're powerful enough to make you feel better. You see, I have a couple mental disorders that make people feel uncomfertable around me, but the few who do stick around will say I'm the kindest person they know. Please, if you end your life you'll miss out on a lot of fun later on. Just give it one last chance and try to meet more people. I'm sure you'll find someone who'll be able to help you.

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  • 2 weeks later...
I am ending it tonight. I have sent my email to everyone telling them why. I don't want to be talked out of it I just want someone to know
Please don't do it.

I've read your thread and what happened with your mom, your brother, you, then your dad and your sister w/ power of attorney privelege.

I tend to agree w others that you should continue to fight.

Not for money, though that in itself isn't an evil thing, but it's a tool to grease the daily skids of life... what you need to take care of your dad!

I'm hoping you will do the right thing, and not abandon your helpless father.

I'm not even going to pretend that I understand your situation, but there are people on this site, including a n00b like me, that would be more than happy to just help you find some more clarity to your actual circumstances and situation.

You don't need Agreement, Just Clarity.

Please don't do what you were thinking of, there IS another way out of this.

Prayers for lmtyler, straight up.

You don't know us, and I don't know anyone either, but we're pullin for you bud, whether you like it or not.

C'mon buddy, 100 years from now, who's gonna care? We have a VERY limited time to make our mark, so c'mon man, you know what to do.

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