The Real Reason For Needing a Break......

[CaliGirl77]

After 2 years, I put my foot down (little lies/big lies/hiding things) and I get "We should take a break....I have some soul searching ahead of me and I want it to lead back to you.........it will be you and me or me alone....."

 

Am I the only one that thinks that is BS? I love him very much and I know he loves me, but perhaps he is bored? He needs some excitement? If that's the case, then tell me! Well, I told him this and he said, we just need time to think about things.

 

Am I overreacting or is there a hidden agenda?

 

I am way too beautiful (he knows this) to be single for too long.......and I will meet someone else, and I am afraid it will be too late for him.

[RayKay]

Well, honestly, I would not worry about it ending up being "too late" for him, it's a risk he evidently is willing to take, and knows full well that there are other men out there. Though, for the record, being "beautiful" is in the eye of the beholder and not the only thing people go for

 

I think he is trying to keep you on a string though, I think he wants to explore his "options" but have you there just in case they don't pan out. Sounds to me he just wants to escape owning up to his actions and responsibilities. If that is case, well honestly, maybe this is a blessing in disguise.

[CaliGirl77]

I just want to grab him and shake him and screan, "you are losing me!!!"

 

What's the saying, "outta sight, outta mind."

[Jayar]

Just not that into you... And sounds EXACTLY like my ex did/does (which RayKay can attest to)

 

I think 2 years was too long to spend on him, and I wouldn't let him back even IF he wanted back! If he wants back, just know it's cuz he tried and failed to find better... But it wasn't for lack of trying. Don't know about you but that would piss me off.

[DN]

If you think you are too beautiful to be single for long and won't be able to resist someone else then I think you should tell him that now and that you are breaking up with him permanently.

 

Or you could demonstrate that you love him and give him a little time to do his soul-searching. Decide how long you might be prepared to wait and tell him after that date you will consider the break a break-up.

[kimmie11479]

CaliGirl77: I'm in the same boat. I understand how you feel. Although, I have had chances to be with people, I'm just not ready and it's been a month 1/2 for me.

[CaliGirl77]

He just called me..........he wants to see me tonight........he says he misses me............

 

What should I do?

 

I want to honestly take this opportunity to let him know he has X amount of time and NO SEX in the meantime......

*no commitment.....NO SEX"

 

Any thoughts on this??????

 

Thanks for everyone's support.....it means alot to me.

[joyce1412]

well, like the others said, even though it seems that he misses you he certainly is keeping you on a string. he's doing what's good for him, which is keeping you on the backburner while he makes himself completely available to others.

 

If he wants back, just know it's cuz he tried and failed to find better... But it wasn't for lack of trying. Don't know about you but that would piss me off.

 

jayar is totally right. and, sadly, that's how some guys think. when i asked one of my guy friends if he would get back with his ex (she broke up with him a year ago), he thought about it for a second, and then said, completely sincerely, "i could settle for her." UGH. it's slightly pragmatic, but it's mostly scummy.

 

you can give him an ultimatum, but you HAVE to be comfortable with whatever he decides to do with it. just be prepared. so if you say, "alright, you have a month to figure it out or we're done," and he says, "well fine, i guess we're done," you're just gonna have to live with it.

 

i agree though, sex is a bad idea in the meantime. you can definitely let him know that. my ex and i had makeup sex after the first few times he tried to break up with me, and i felt like such an idiot for it later.

 

by the way, being the hottie that you are, why don't you get thee into the dating pool and find yourself some new "options," eh?

[tylercdurden2004]

I am way too beautiful (he knows this) to be single for too long.......and I will meet someone else, and I am afraid it will be too late for him.

 

True enough. But ask yourself this is the next person you meet someone you will settle for or is it something more you are looking for. Many people meet a lot of people each day. It really means nothing until you find someone you want to be with. Maybe being single for a while is what you need to figure out what it is you want.

[chai714]

What ever happened with this?