Drugs and my relationship

[itsallgrand]

If he binges when you leave - you know you need to leave him - it is not your fault!

 

I know how difficult it is to walk away from someone who is an addict. We feel guilty. We want to help.

You'll get over that, I promise you. Right now you just need to get out and rebuild your self-esteem.

You'll be no good to anybody if you destroy your life with drugs, or end up in a morgue. And, yes, this is a matter of life or death, though it may not seem so now.

 

There's a big lesson here though: every person is responsible for themself.

You can only choose for you.

He must make his own choices and mistakes, as horrible as his choices may be.

 

You need to stop doing the drugs 'once in a blue moon'. Surround yourself with people who care and will call you on your drug use.

[Anna.]

candy, you cannot admit someone else to a rehab facility. You have to have an amazing case for them being a danger to themselves AND then they can only keep them 72 hours. Someone literally has to be going to commit suicide before the state will keep them against their will.

 

(where I live, anyway)

[Salty]

It'sallgrand' your advice was a real eye opener. I really have to start caring about myself ! Its just his friends and him kept drilling in my head that i'm doing all this for myself when really i was doing it for him and I have to start being the "crazy self absorbed bi***" like his friends say i am but now for myself .

[Salty]

My boyfriend called and i read him what i wrote and now hes mad because i didnt include the fact that when i used to do e i would get it for him. and that i did acid infront of him and that i went behind his back and told people not to give acid to him because i knew how addictive and dangerous it is. He is blind right now he is a fing addict I don't think I can deal with this anymore it's annoying me now more than hurting me!

[candy604]

he's an addict and will ruin his life with drugs. he's just in denial right now

 

go find someone else.

 

for rehab? oh i didn't know that..i'm not sure what the laws here are ( in vancouver, canada).

[southerngirl]

Like I said you need to just get out of the situation.

 

If you really want to get off the drugs you are going to have to change who you hang out with, I know thats hard... You are going to have to put yourself above all others for a while. Be selfish..

 

Let him sink or swim on his own. TAke back your life before your life takes you.... Thats real

 

 

Ive been there... I dont want to get to personal on here, but I know all about all that.. I have one step brother thats so messed up on crack cocaine right now that he doesnt care about anyone not even himself. His two kids are being raised by my father and step mom because he is unfit and his 'wife' is no different.

 

Im telling you this is not the path you want to take...

 

Your not talking about smoking weed or drinking... YOur talking about some hard stuff here... Get away save yourself.. Enroll in college cut that crazyness out of your system.. Think of your future..

 

You can do anything that you want to do. YOu can be anything that you want to be.... The next five years in your life will determine all of it. What you do with those years.... where you go after highschool (if you graduate) that is all up to you.

 

Do you want to be one of those losers on tv that are so strung out they have nothing to be proud of? thats real...

 

Or do you want to be the strong independent woman that I know you can be... Look to your heart.. where do you want to be in your future because Ill tell you there are many fish in the sea... YOu may love him yes but he is here to teach you a lesson in life.. Think of it as trying on a pair of shoes.. That 'relationship' pair of shoes starts to pinch your toes and you outgrow them what do you do? YOu take yourself to the store and buy some new shoes..

 

 

From what your saying you already see this is not something you want to be involved in. So I believe your soul whispers... do you listen? The rest is up to you.

[Salty]

Southern girl Props to that!

[itsallgrand]

Hey, I'm glad your eyes are opening!

 

southerngirl is right. You're gonna have to be strong and rise up above all this nonsense. You could argue and mess around with the bf for years and simply go in circles. So you need to step out and away from it all.

 

If they call you a 'self-absorbed byatch' , well, let them. You're not. What you did in the past is over. Forget about it. All that matters is what you choose NOW.

 

Do you have some friends who are drug-free and away from that scene?

[Salty]

i did but I lost them when i started going out with my boyfriend and started doing drugs

[itsallgrand]

Maybe you could re-connect with one or a few of them, and set to work at making some new friends and finding some new things to do.

 

btw: if that is you in the avatar, you are very pretty. You sound like a smart person, too, and interesting.

I wish the best of luck in this. You're going to be amazed at how much better things can be without all this stress in your life.

 

take care

[maasikus]

Have you both considered drug rehabilitation? Don't waste away doing drugs... You need to get out of this habit ASAP. The good news is that you want to quit anyway. Being with friends who do it is just going to make it very hard for you. If need be, you should break up with this guy. Because, as I said earlier, being with others doing drugs will just bring in more temptation for you.

I do not mean to sound rude, but I want you to understand that this is serious. I do not think you are controlling him in anyway.

 

Unless you really understand what drugs do to you, you will still have the temptation. So, please seek professional help before it is too late.

 

Maasikus

[Salty]

We just broke up - i'm numb right now...in shock i don't know if i can do this.

[candy604]

Good for you and don't go back, don't talk to him. You need to care for yourself and get yourself back on track.

[Anna.]

You can do it! That is SO cool that you did that

We're here to support you.

[PRSOV]

You have made the right decision for yourself.

 

I just hope he gets the help needed.

[southerngirl]

Girl, you can do this!!!! Im proud of you! Stick strong and dont take him back. WE are here for you, if you want to pm me do it, Ill be happy to talk more if you ever need someone supportive, i have been there and wont judge ya.

 

its really a good thing you broke up.. you may not feel that way now and may not for a long time but it really is good. Now, concentrate on getting your life back on track away from him.

[Salty]

I'm talking to him on msn he's acting as if we havent broken up and hes getting mad about how i wont get him acid and how its the last drug he will ever do... i know hes in denial and that acid is just going to make him fall back into his holdways and a few new ones but hes guilt tripping me into getting him acid and i dont want to be the one who can be responsible for ruining his life and hes not seeing liket hat because i have done acid twice before once infront of him! i just wish i hadnt made those mistakes but there is no going back in time i cant take that back but i did apologise but like every addict he finds a reason or excuse for doing drugs again....even using my mistakes! do i have the right to say no to him after all my mistakes after doing it infront of him no matter how sorry i am?

[candy604]

if you know its wrong, don't give it to him. He's just addicted to it and yes, you have a right to say no though you made a mistake. DRUGS ARE BAD PERIOD.

[Anna.]

Don't let him play games like this with you. Tell him you're not gonna facilitate HIS bad habits.

And don't ever let any man throw your past mistakes up in your face EVER. My Mamma taught me that.

You are trying to be better person and he doesn't even care, he wants you right down in the dirt with him. Every heard, "Misery loves company?" He doesn't respect that you are trying to get your life together and clean.

 

you don't play with acd anyway. Like I said that's one of the very few things I never did, b/c I was scared of it. I've heard some bad stories. I had to turn my friends down before to, like we'd be hanging out and they'd want me to take them to get something, and they make you feel like your being immature or petty, but don't listen. They don't understand that they are putting you in the middle of their addictions.

Besides, if you give your ex-bf some acid, and he has a reaction and dies or something crazy, YOU can be held at fault legally.