Angstyboi Posted July 31, 2006 Share Posted July 31, 2006 She was a very loving girlfriend, and I was really loving boyfriend. It was great, she never wanted to let me go. Eventually she started...losing it and told me she needed time to be alone. When she was ready she'll consider heavily coming back to me. She went out with a kid who was rid of within like 2 weeks. She then came back to me, still my ex, kissing me, holding my hand, everything she would do when she was my girlfriend. Last sunday she began doing the whole vunerable thing. She began to sexually expose herself and tried to fiddle with my belt, till I stopped her. I told her "I do not want you for sex, I want you for you." After that...it just seemed like held a grudge on me. She began to ignore me, I called her and she broke the news to me. She is going out with a kid younger then her, when she said 2 days before that she won't be ready for a long time. Her promises were all broken. I was crying on the phone, telling her, reminding her not to forget who I am. Instead, she put me on speaker phone so her friends and her new boyfriend including herself can laugh at me. I was getting over it but yesterday she made another low blow which was basically that I was a crummy boyfriend. She said different our whole relationship. I take it seriously when I do something that involves my time, my love, and my patience and I'm not recognized by the one person...Listen, I don't care if she's my ex. It still really HURTS. I'm really losing it, my blood boils, my fists clench and I just want to kill her! Link to comment
ButterflyWrists Posted July 31, 2006 Share Posted July 31, 2006 She isn't worth you. Leave her to do what she wants. Ignor her, don't let her know how much it is getting to you, she isn't worth your love time and attension. Go out with your friends, and try and totally forget about her. I know it hurts, and from what you've said I thik she may have just been using you Link to comment
Angstyboi Posted July 31, 2006 Author Share Posted July 31, 2006 I'm sorry but I don't care whether or not she used me because it would hurt either way. Are there any books that I can get into that can help me that anyone knows of at least? Link to comment
Slagar Posted July 31, 2006 Share Posted July 31, 2006 I'm really sorry to hear about your story JJ I don't know of any good books that may help, unfortunately. But that girl sounds like a really low-life person. You're much better off without her. Some girls just know they can have their way with guys unfortunately, and they use this to their advantage to hurt us. If she ever grows up enough to realise what she's done, she won't be proud of it. Distance yourself from her, and use this hurt to make yourself stronger. Don't talk to her, even if you want to. Don't be her friend. It's her loss, not yours. Be the bigger person, and she'll realise what she's missing out on. Work out, get fit, and focus on your own life; school, work, hobbies etc. Don't worry, you will find a loving girl one day - who truly does care for you, and what you do for her. You will find someone that truly appreciates and deserves your love. It may take some time, but this is only the beginning of your life. Wishing you all the best. Hang in there Link to comment
nottoogreen Posted July 31, 2006 Share Posted July 31, 2006 You lost a "sure expectation" and are angry. Let's call it microdepression. The solution is balance. As allways. A bit of reading will help you understand. What is depression? Depression is a mental pain caused by an imbalance between expectations and ability. To make the pain go away, one has to improve ones ability (do better) and/or change ones expectations. In other words, to avoid depression, one ought to balance ability and expectations. Balance is it, as so often in life. More in: Wicked She is not a nice person, writing her off will restore balance. Link to comment
lilac_indi Posted July 31, 2006 Share Posted July 31, 2006 she put you on speaker phone so her friends and her bf could laugh at you?! that is below the belt mate.....she is not worth your time or energy. i know its hard but i suggest you give yourself some time to heal. clearly she doesnt give a damn about you - show her that you are capable of carrying on without her. take each day as it comes. i feel your pain. my ex humiliated me as well and it took me a while to come out of the shock of it. i then realised that he must not have really loved me if he did that to me and my hurt turned to anger like you. after i experienced that only then did i realise that he is not even worthy of my hatred. dont waste your energy on her jay. look after you now - look after number one and ignore her taunts. if anything i feel sorry for her current bf! Link to comment
Caine Posted July 31, 2006 Share Posted July 31, 2006 Women can be cruel when you break up, they'll say things like, 'You were crap in bed' or 'You have a small penis' Yet it was never an issue when you were dating. If she's the kind of girl that puts you on speaker and done what she did, her new b/f probably sat there and thought, 'Oh my god what am I letting myself in for' She's stupid, she's just shown him what it will be like when they split up, and believe me, they aint gonna last long!! Don't have any contact with her, NONE. Move on and I bet you find happiness way before she does, you sound so much more grown up than her, I know it's tough but hang in there mate, you will get through this. The more you speak to her the harder it will be, I know from experience. Link to comment
Angstyboi Posted July 31, 2006 Author Share Posted July 31, 2006 She used to be a nice person, but now she's so far gone. So I really don't know what to believe. She's gone mad and has forgotten who her first true love was, how can you do that? Because I'm sure having trouble trying to forget about her and her evil words. But it's not even that I just think about, it's like she died. I can never kiss her again, hold her, anything. Yeah once I get a new girl, it won't matter probably but I can't change the fact she was my first love. My emotions are switching between hate and lust and it's driving me mad. Link to comment
lilac_indi Posted July 31, 2006 Share Posted July 31, 2006 well its natural that you are still going to have some feelings for her still. thats how i felt about my ex. i was soo in love with him but i felt hatred for him at the same time and it drove me insane to the point where that was all i could think about. it was like i lost myself in the process. first loves are hard to get over - especially when you gave them your all and they didnt appreciate it. she didnt value your worth. i failed to understand why my ex treated me the way he did after the split. he spread stories about me and he laughed behind my back. i discovered his true nature after we split up and it hurt like mad. however at the same time i felt that the breakup was the best thing for me and maybe this is the case for you as well. at least now you have realised what she is really like - now maybe someone better will come along and treat you with the love and respect you deserve? Link to comment
nottoogreen Posted July 31, 2006 Share Posted July 31, 2006 All I can say, get over her and find a new girl. Your true love will come. Link to comment
Angstyboi Posted August 1, 2006 Author Share Posted August 1, 2006 I want something from her now. My friend told her and she said fine but she doesn't want to see me. I guess it's an honor, I mean if she really didn't care she wouldn't mind seeing me now would she? Link to comment
nottoogreen Posted August 1, 2006 Share Posted August 1, 2006 A smart man will take a no for a no. Link to comment
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