hello

[Jacked]

New guy here. I need advice from you people pls. Ok, here it goes:

 

My wife and I ran away and got married (eloped) in 2002

Her Father didn't like me and my Father didn't like her. They have been enemies for more then 40 yrs now. When i asked her father why he did not approve of me he said " Your great grandfather did something to my grandfather and ever since then i don't like you and your family"

 

Anyways, We have been broken up twice and have gotten back together again. The reason why we broke up was because of the families (Both sides)

 

We were really close to signing the divorce papers and she started crying and told me that she did not want to go through this and still loved me. My feelings started coming back for her and now i don't know what to tell my family about her being in my life again. No one approves of her not my family, my friends and other people that i know. Some people told me to follow my heart and this is our last strike were already on strike 2. When we were separated for 1 year i did not miss her knowing the fact that we were still keeping in touch and we were still sleeping together. She told me that she wants to leave town and start a brand new life with me. I wish i could pack up and leave but i can't. My parents are old and they need me to be there for them as much as i can. It really scares me that if we do move in together i'll feel like i'm no longer there for my parents. Also, her parents were trying to hook her up with some other guy and she did not like him because she's still in love with me. After all that's happened, do I love her still? I ask that question everyday and i don't know the answer. But i know when we start living together we will get attched really fast.

 

Any advice on what to do?

[Beyondthesea]

If you two really loved one another, it wouldn't matter to you what your parents say.

 

My family didn't approve of my boyfriend (now fiance) at first, and you know what? I told them that he came with me, and if they didn't like it, then I wouldn't see them anymore, period.

 

If you really love her, tell your parents it's too bad for them and you will be with who you want. They don't have to like the idea, but it's your life. Period.

[robowarrior]

Love > hatred.

 

You have my blessing to marry her and be happy. That those two have a quarrel is none of your bussiness. If they start nagging about it, just say LOOK that you two (grandparents) have an argument together is none of mine or her bussiness, she is not him ok, i love her and am married to her and i will not stand for it that you insult my wife.

 

You are the Man you have to defend your wife and your style of life.

[screwedup]

I agree with Beyondthesea. It's your life. You choose whom you want to spend your life with.

 

A friend of mine was dating this guy who's 20 years older than her. Guy was divorced and had a kid. Her dad was so mad at her. "If you marry him, i am not your father anymore". But, the always-a-good-daughter girl knew what she wanted for her life, and they got married. She told me that's the best decision she ever made for her life. Guess what, her dad accepts the guy now. What else can he do?

[Mr Mister1]

Have to say it's pretty childish to take something that your grandfather did out on you. I saw both lots of parents should grow up!

 

I agree with everyone else, you shouldn't go against what you want just because of their petty and immature demands. Don't disown them as such just tell them that's what you're doing and it's their problem if they don't like it. If they need you to be there for them I'd say they'll backflip on the old threats.

[Jennster]

This sounds like Romeo and Juliet with the two families quarelling. Please don't let it end that way! Metaphorically speaking of course I think you first need to figure if you really love this woman or not - regardless of the family situation. DO YOU LOVE HER? If you do, then stay true to the committment you made to her. Sure you have to be there to take care of your family...but they are not being much of a family by rejecting the woman you chose to spend the rest of your life with.

[Jacked]

Thank you for all your advice. I thought about it and YES i will spend my life with her and protect her.

 

Thanks again.