Living in hell. Help !!!

[tina_chang202000]

My friend Linda who has asked me for advises. But I

think that all of your helps and advises to her would

be better than mine.

 

My friend is living in hell !!! Please help !!!

 

Linda dated Rick 12 years ago. They were very poor and

don't have any thing ... even a car to go to work. He has

lied to her that he has never marriage before.

 

After dating Rick 3 years, he confessed and would like

to marry to Linda. He said that he has two kids and his

wife left him. According to him, his wife (Rose) took

the kids at age 2 and unborn back to China because of

her visa problem plus they had a big argument. He said

that Rose has problem with immigration papers so that

she cannot come back to USA again. According to him,

Rose's parents are very successful so they took good

care of her and the kids and he lost contact with her.

Linda has agreed and they got married.

 

Three years after married, Linda and Rick have some

extra money with their hard working and earning. He

secretly connected with his ex-wife and have sent money

for them. a couple years later, Linda found out, but it

is still ok with her to support his family.

 

Rick has 3 kids with Linda at age 6, 4 and 2 now. Linda

and Rick have worked hard to raise 3 kids here in US and

his secret supports for his ex-wife and 2 kids at age 15

and 13 in China.

 

Now, he went back to China and filled out the papers for

his ex-wife and the kids come to USA. Linda and Rick

have 2 houses, one of the house they put the sign for

sale. Now, he doesnot want to sell so that his ex and

the 2 kids can stay there.

 

Rick has mental abused Linda by separated her with her

family and her friends. He has banned all of her family

members cannot come to their house. He has put a spy

equipments on the phone. He also has printed all the

phone ID numbers from his fax machine every time he got

home.

 

Linda feels depress and very upset about the facts. They

have some arguments recently and he told her that she can

get out their house whenever she wants. He said that

Linda is stupid and his ex-wife has a lot of talents that

he didnot see before.

 

Linda's family has requested him and her for the marriage

license a long time ago. But he has refused to have it

with the reason that it's his owned family matter and he

has loved Linda. Now, Linda doesnot have a paper to prove

that she is his wife. However, his ex-wife and him still

have the married license.

 

Linda loves her kids a lot. And Rick knows her weakness,

he said that if Linda loves her kids, she should be quiet

and let him raise total 2 wives and 5 kids. Linda is a

stay home wife for one year now. Before that, she and Rick

worked hard to run their two businesses.

 

He got one of his kids to US now. He has some problems

with the younger kid because she was born in China. Now,

Rick has tried to apply for his ex wife with the employment

visa so that Rose can come to USA with the

younger kid.

 

 

My questions:

 

1. Can he be charged if he will live with two wives?

2. Can police of USA immigration do any thing to him?

3. Should Linda leave him?

4. Will Linda get 1/2 of their properties if she doesnot

have the married license?

 

5. What do you do if you are Linda?

[Aura Seeker]

By law, they are married. They have been together several years, and have built businesses and raised children.

 

I would think that she should first contact a lawyer and find out what her legal standing would be.

 

She does not have to put up with him having two wives. It is not legal. And even if there are no papers on one, morally he is responsible.

 

I would advise your friend to seek legal counsel.

 

From what you have said, he sounds very mean and inconsiderate to her feelings. Not a good place for her to be.

 

JMO

 

A

[EmptySoul]

wow. im not sure about the legal stuff, but it sounds like lindas husband has serious issues. i see no way that she can be happy living with someone like that. if the children's mother is so unhappy, how are lindas children ever going to be happy. linda's husband has lied way too much for anything to work, even if he did fess up. no matter what linda feels for this man, it would be better for her and her children to get out of this twisted man's life. he pretty much has another wife, he has kids, and hes taking control over linda's life too. even when you get married you still have to have your friends and family and your own identity and who you are. it seems this man is taking all this away. i really think it would be the best thing for her and her children to LEAVE. i hope she makes a wise decision soon...