Once In A While

[xblondyx]

Well this post concerns me and a past ex of mine. I guess we are kinda friends, we don't talk in person but we speak everyday over MSN (he is always the one who initiates conversation).

 

Anyway, like I said me and this ex talk practically everyday and sometimes we get this good humored banter going which is really good considering what we had been through in the past.

 

Rolling back to about 3/4 weeks ago, this guy said he still had a few feeling for me. I just brushed this comment aside as many people have told me to leave the past in the past.

 

Today, well about 25 minutes ago, we were talking on MSN. He started the conversation and it was just a normal start to a chat. He was asking what I had been doing today and i told him i had been sunbathing and that i was all red from the sun. He kept saying "haha" so i was like "well at least i'll have a tan" and he was like "bet you get all peely skin" and i was like ok i'll hold you to that bet blah blah blah and he kept bringing it up in later conversation.

 

Then a few minutes later he goes so hows the redness? and I said it was going down, no sign of peelyness. He was like "bet you a shag it goes peely".

This kinda gobsmacked me. I didn't know what to say back so i just put "lol" and then he said he was just joking and now he's gone all quiet.

 

I really like it how we get along so well and i still do have feelings for him but i'd rather keep that quiet so we can still be friends as i want him in my life. But sometimes he says things like he just said then the conversation gets all stilted and we end up not talking.

 

I just wonder what this guys thinking. Does he still have feelings for me? Or does he just want to be friends?

 

Anyone got a clue?

[AwdreeHpburn]

maybe he just wants a shag???

[Q10]

He wants you physically and doesn't want you emotionally, so he's testing his chances with you with jokes so hoping it won't effect your friendship if he asks it in a jokingly way.

[xblondyx]

Well a few weeks ago he asked me to be his friend, with benefits. I didn't say i would or i wouldn't as i was confused but then he called it off saying it may be weird and we may get attached again....then he goes and says this.

[flower99]

You are wondering if he still has feelings for you? Well I'm thinking yes

1. he initates conversations with you daily - 2. He told you he does

I think the reason your conversations get all ackward & stop is cause you haven't discussed the issue of feelings, but to me he seems to subtly try to bring it up to see where you stand.

next time he says something like that, make a joke back about him likeing you & wanting you... get on the topic & find out what's up.

[flower99]

Oh wait, he asked about friends with benefits

I think he may just be testing to see what he can get from you & retracted the question when you didn't agree.

[xblondyx]

I'm confused you see. I tried to start up a conversation about our past feelings the other day but he told me that he would prefer never to talk about it.

So basically its ok for him to want sex from me but i can't talk to him about anything :S men.....who needs em ay?!?!

[kellbell]

Hi Blondy,

 

I am sure he would still like to have a shag with you but it is my belief he is testing you. Remember he is your ex and any kind of sexual relations with him might make things extremely hard for you and he may reap all the benefits of having that kind of relationship with no strings attached.

 

If I were you, I would refrain from talking to him on MSN for awhile. He initiates it because he knows you will take the bait. I can see this getting out of hand and can cause you pain. If you are confused, you best bet is to not do anything at all. Enjoy your summer girl!

[nottoogreen]

Hi xblondyx

 

He is ready for a shag anytime. He may have feelings for you but don't count on it and it does not really matter as you have split up a while ago and the fundamentals between you have not changed.

 

Better tell him "no thanks" when he talks suggestive. Perhaps it is better to keep the conversations shorter and less frequent. I think he will stop when you reject him a few times.

 

Should you think of to continue with him, beware of the fundamentals.

[xblondyx]

Thanks everyone i've decided to cut contact for a bit, he can talk to me, i will be civil but won't be overly nice to him so that the conversation will not last for long.

To be honest, if i did get into a FWB relationship with him it would screw me up big style as i loved this guy and he f**ked me around. I'm just gonna continue with my life - the sun is shining and i'm happy!!

[flower99]

Good choice hun!!! I think that is the best choice, stick to it

best of luck to you