HOW do I break up with him?

[jaxlo]

We've been together for about a year and a half now and I've been really unhappy. It's like I have no self esteem with him and when I pick a fight he turns it around and makes me feel guilty.

I can't break up with him though, I really just want to wait until I know I'll be out of this small city. But that's unhealthy so anyway, how do I go about this?

[dopexile]

Well since you've been with him for at least a year and half you owe him the decency of letting him know it's over. It would be best to just tell him in person but if you can't then I guess a letter or email would be better than nothing. Don't spell things out for him and make judgemental statements... just tell him you want to date other people. And after that just walk away and don't look back. Don't contact him and if he tries to contact you ignore him.

[Skippy]

Stop using him. Breakup with him. As you said, you dont love him.

How? in person and tell hm that you are not happy in your relationship.

[renaissancewoman101]

If you have lost your feelings for him, dont drag things out and break up with him. It will hurt more for him and for you if you drag things out. Also, it is better to be the breaker than the breakee, that I do know. When I was going out with my ex, I lost my feelings for him and I didnt know what to do. So, I dragged out the relationship for a few months, put him thorough hell by ignoring him, not spending time with him, hanging out with an old ex of mines, etc. Finally he went and got the guts and broke up with me and I was devastated even though I had lost my feelings for him.

[alteer]

Stop using him. Breakup with him. As you said, you dont love him.

How? in person and tell hm that you are not happy in your relationship.

 

I agree. You do need to break up with him if you don't love him. Sooner rather than later. And yes, you should do it in person. Being dumped hurts but being dumped any other way is like hell. You've had quite a lengthy relationship and that's the most decent way to do it.

[Tigris]

Tell him you haven't been happy in the relationship for a while and it's time for you to move on.

 

Good luck

[shamus]

dont break up via email. sit him down, look him in the eye.

dont do like my ex did to me.

look him in the eye, be kind. my ex did it via text message.

dont string him along and give him false hope. i was told a month later that she missed me, we talked about getting together, i said ok and agreed to counseling but lets keep it between us and not air dirty laundry. focus on us. she took this wrong and later backed out. then that weekend called and texted me still, then accused me of a new lover, only for me 2 find out 2 weeks later that she had the new lover.

 

tell him to his face, he may cry, whine, beg, but let him. at least i could respect my ex then. and let it end. if i hadnt been led on, i probably would have been in a better place today instead the false hope really messed with my head.

 

so just tell him. there is no easy way to do it. but there is a right way, and there is a way to do it where he can at least respect you later on

[itsallgrand]

You can do this. I agree with the others.

 

Be prepared to be met with a lot of emotionality. Expect the unexpected. Be clear about your feelings: but leave out the messy details. He does not need to hear of things he can not change now (breaking up is a bad time to bring up issues, since you are leaving and there is no chance of fixing them).

 

Answer his questions honestly.

Consider his feelings foremost.

Do not let it linger into a long drawn out affair. Keep it clean and try to leave on a positive note.

 

good luck.