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How to not put a girl on a pedestal???


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I met this girl a few nights back.. things went super smoothly. The vibe was great between us. She stared in my eyes when I was talking but seemed a bit shy when she talked (like, she was nervous... she didn't keep eye contact as much when she was talking...)...

 

Anyway, I am pretty sure she is interested and I am asking her out for this weekend. However, what I am worried about is that I like her almost too much! She seems like a great girl but I hardly know much about her so I know that I am just magnifying the things that I do know. So, part of me just wants to step back and realize I don't know her well. But, another part of me doesn't want to ruin that chemistry/spark but trying to analyze the situation.

 

I guess I am a little worried that date two might not go as smooth for some reason. But, I am looking forward/excited to see her again.

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Hi there,

 

It sounds like a you are a bit infacutated with her and that is okay. It is a common feeling one experiences in the very beginning of a relationship. The key is to start off slow, build the friendship foundation, and REALLY get aquinated with the person. That way when the infactuation wears off (it does usually between 60-120 days) after the relatonship begins, you both can move successfully into the next phase of the relationship.

 

Here is some info on Infactuation:

 

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dude - don't set yourself up for failure!

 

its ok to like her. She's not a flawless being, but its OK to be into her.

 

Over-analysing is never a good idea...

 

i suggest going out again but with NO expectations.

 

That way a great time will be a pleasant surprise, a mediocre time will be perfectly acceptable, and if things aren't going well, you weren't expecting anything one way or the other so you'll be better able to think on your feet.

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Just realize that she is just another human being like you, no more or no less special. Which also means that she shouldn't get any special treatment if you aren't getting any back. Dating and relationships should be equal, not a guy treating a girl like a princess, because you will end up putting her on a pedastle and she will lose respect for you if that happens. Make sure your needs are being met by her too.

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yeah.. I guess, I just felt like she was really digging me also and a part of me was thinking she was maybe too into me... haha... Anyway, I am not going to focus on her... There are some other girls I met recently also so I will keep in touch with everyone and see how it goes. I just don't want her to think I am her "perfect man" as I feel like then I could do something small to disappoint her. I am trying to go into it with an open mind to have fun though...

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You know, all you have to do is realize that she may *not* meet all your standards. Find out more about her. If she's a good person, then it'll work out fine. But don't kiss up to her just because YOU like her. Get to know her.

 

For all you know she could be an axe murderer!

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