alcoholica

[walkingwithaghost]

hey people, im seeing this guy. he has a lot of problems mentally and emotionally. i like him very very much. basically he's really smart he got a 1600 on the sats, but has like problems that can come along with being really intelligent.

 

also he had a really bad childhood. i dont mean to be blunt but in the interest of saving time he was a child actor and in some movies and a tv show. and he was molested by a priest when he was 10. anyway.

 

when he's drunk we hang out he tells me how much he likes me. he said he wanted to get married and have kids. all his friends were shocked when he said this (so i dont think he says this sort of thing to girls often)

 

he texts me all this like "i love you" stuff when he's drunk.

 

he stopped talking to me like a couple weeks ago and i called him to ask what was wrong and he said he thought i was out of his league so thats why he wasnt calling me. i'm more attractive then he is. plus he has no money. since then things have been pretty cool.

 

but sometimes if i text him he ignores me. and doesnt text me back until i ask if something is wrong then he'll text me back. we've only been hanging out since march... also like we're not having sex. i told him ive never had sex with anyone, hes 22, i'm 21. i dont think he cares about that. but we fooled around on tuesday and he left wens morning at like 6 am (after drinking my bottle of smirnoff) he didn't wanna sleep over which is weird cause he always wants to sleep over. but, while we were fooling around he said we'd prolly have sex in six months and i laughed and said more like six days. then when he left he said "see you in six days" then i just texted him now asking if he wanted to hang out tonight and he didnt text me back... i know he likes me a lot, but why is he ignoring me like this? he's probably afraid to get attached to me. but maybe he's annoyed we havent had sex or done more than we've done??? he really wanted me to give him head but i wasnt ready. do you think he's like "this is BS"??? also he said once "i like you, if i didn't like you i would have stonewalled you (ignored you) ive done that to you before" so do you think he's ignoring me cause he's annoyed/frustrated we're not doing more?

 

uh help.

[annie24]

I think that this guy has a lot of problems. Don't get sucked into them. His flakiness probably stems from his drinking and maybe not having a real direction in life. If he can't hold down a job and make and save some money, how will he ever find the mental focus to keep a girl?

 

I think that you should leave him alone. He sounds like a total trainwreck. I've dated these types before Stay away!!!

[walkingwithaghost]

he has a job. we met at work. he graduated from nyu last year. this is like his year off where he's trying to decide what to do next.

[annie24]

he stopped talking to me like a couple weeks ago and i called him to ask what was wrong and he said he thought i was out of his league so thats why he wasnt calling me. i'm more attractive then he is. plus he has no money. since then things have been pretty cool.

 

well, you said he is broke. I didn't necessarily assume he didn't have a job, just the one he had wasn't paying for his drinking habit. If he didn't drink, he wouldn't be broke.

 

Anyways, this man sounds full of excuses - bad childhood, no money, child actor, drinks a lot, fear of getting involed, you're too good looking for him, blah blah blah. Are those really good excuses not to return your text if he is truly interested in you?

 

It sounds to me, to put it quite bluntly, that he has a lot of problems to work out and that he's "just not that into you." Not because you aren't awesome and hot woman, but because he has so many problems, he can't really be into ANYONE until he gets his head on straight.

[itsallgrand]

Yeah, he's a trainwreck.

 

Don't stare too long.....

[Empathy]

I don't know the guy so I can't tell you what his intentions are. But going on what you've told me...don't invest too much into this person. Don't get your hopes up that anything will be lasting because you're only going to fall harder if and when things don't work out.

[walkingwithaghost]

its over. i asked him if he wanted to be my bf. he said no. he said i seem like a really good person and am still ok and he would only * * * * me up. he said he's a scum bag and cant be someone's first serious relationship. he said he doesnt think he can fall in love again. so its over. i feel sad. but its true. he has his own * * * *ing problems and i dont hate him. its a very sad situation. very very sad. considering everything that happened to him. he said i was ok and he was damaged goods. he wasn't lying and making up excuses about why he didnt want to be with me. he was telling the truth. and he's right. thats why its so sad.

[annie24]

breaksups are always hard. I know it hurts now, but you know this... the breakup is really for the best. you deserve someone who has their life together. this man doesn't.

 

think about it - when you were a little girl, did you always hope to meet a man with tons of emotional problems, drinks too much, and ignores you? was that what you always hoped for? No. Don't forget your standards. You deserve a great guy.

[btbt]

Yeah, this guy doesn't seem like much a winner. It doesn't have anything to do with his child acting, his lack of money, drinking etc. (okay, his drinking is a big problem), but if he's not calling you or responding to your calls and texts, you should drop him like a hot potato. Don't make excuses for him because he has a difficult background. If he were a really "with it" guy, but didn't call you back etc., you'd be out of there already.