1st email from the ex

[LL1979]

well its been 3 months since the ex left me in her dust (we were in love) to canoodle with another, and i've applied nc throughout. her aunt contacted me a month ago, and now the ex herself just emailed a couple of days ago.

 

the tone of the email is pretty much

"hi, how are you? been meaning to email. you dont have to reply, i hope youre well, etc etc"

 

its pretty neutral, so what do i do? And what's SHE doing?

[DN]

I would ask her why she wants to know - not aggressively but to ask what is the point of her contacting you.

[bobo85]

She's testing you. She wants to see if you still have feelings for her. You can contact her but make the email sound friendly. Talk about the present and future. NOT ABOUT THE PAST.

[music_girl]

i say reply. it's rude to not answer an email so let's go for politeness

 

maybe she's testing you so i agree with bobo85, talk to her as if she was a friend

 

hope it helped

[Venturer]

nah, what's the point in replying?

[kadvati79]

nah, what's the point in replying?

 

Whats the point in doing anything ever when it comes to the heart

 

Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Just be sure you actually WANT to head down this road, which in all probability, will ned up in heartache again.

[LL1979]

Its a type of situation thats reported a lot on these forums. But she ran off with someone else, why should I even listen to her? I'd like to give her another chance if she truly wanted it, but I don't want her to think I'm a pushover. What to do...

[Trex]

I think you should answer her, but keep it very upbeat (friendly) and brief. I never believe in being rude. Take it from there. I think enough time has passed for you to start a new relationship with her (even if it's just friends for now)--- if you're totally healed from the break-up of course.

 

If you can become friends again and you can date others and be busy and just talk and see each other occasionally while building the friendship , who's to say she might not want to get back together down the road??? I think anything is possible here. But you have to go in with NO expectations, and make sure you're heart is prepared for rejection. That's a tall order for a lot of people, but I still say if you're strong enough, anything can happen.

 

If it hurts too much, stay away from her!!! Answer the email and be polite, but don't do anything more. It all depends on how you feel...

[LL1979]

I decided not to ignore her - thought that would seem petty. So I wrote a brief text saying hi, I'm fine, hope your well, etc. Light. I got one back a while later from her, telling me how her day was, glad I was doing well, etc. Nothing unusual (apart from the fact she was contacting me at all). That's it. So, I guess its back to NC for me, until she strikes again...