women's menstrual cycle

[monsieur]

I hope this doesn't offend anyone, but it is a serious question that has been on my mind.

 

Is there a point in the monthly cycle, or a range of time, when women feel more receptive to falling in love or becoming infatuated with a guy? Conversely, is there a part of the month where meet ups for the hope of love are much less likely to be successful?

 

Do women long for love more the week before menstruation, or the week after? two weeks after?

 

I need to make a potentially life changing move in a relationship I have, and I woulld hate to doom my chances by picking the wrong time for mood and chemistry reasons. thanks so much for any thoughts

[the yang to the worlds yin]

i know that around our menstrual cycle, many woman tend to have a raise in their sex drive, thats for sure. but as far as being more prone or repeled by love, i'm guessing not so much.

[monsieur]

thanks for the reply, when you say 'around' do you mean just before AND just after?

 

... and as far as sex drive goes, it seems to me (correct me if Im wrong), but if a girl can't possibly imagine having sex with a guy (even if it is a concept for the far ahead future), then his chances of getting her to love him are slim, but if she feels a 'drive' toward him, her feelings toward him may be that much more open to the potential of love..... so a guy trying to emotionally connect with a girl for the first time might have a better chance at these times? am I at all possibly right?

 

This is such an important thing for me because I may only have one chance, so every possible thing must be perfect for the situation, if I blow this move it will change everything in my life forever.

[the yang to the worlds yin]

it may be different depending on the woman. usually for me, it's the week before and the week of. but if your girlfriend has bad menstrual cycles, aka cramps, and irritability, i'm guessing it would be an awful time to ask her anything important. why not wait till her emotions and hormones are more settled down?

[RayKay]

Um....around ovulation a women will tend to have a spike in her sex drive, and sometimes during certain points of her cycle can feel I suppose more close to her partner then at other times, but I really don't think it effect's the willingness to fall in love or be in a relationship or not. Not in my experience anyway.

 

If so, what would happen a week later when she was no longer in that mood!?!

[monsieur]

well, it seems to me a psychological 'mindset' is a factor in relationships, if two people end up together, things change..... example, a couple that never could see each other together share an intimate moment for who knows what reason, and from then on they both see each other in a different light, ... and vice versa, a situation where a women might really like a guy, but he does something somehow that she doesn't see attractive one day, and that changes her mindset for him forever and his chances are extremely reduced

 

 

So if a person can just get over that initial stage to where intimacy is possible in both of their mindsets, it wouldn't then matter as much where the rest of the month went for her moods.... but if a guy picked the wrong time to try and woo a girl's heart, and she felt adverse to it at the time, that impression would stay with both of them and may doom any possible relationship forever.

[CarnelianButterfly]

If you feel your chances are so slim that you have to rely on a hormonal change in the woman of interest then you really need to reevaluate your goals in this relationship. Because frankly if I were the woman involved and found out you used my menstrual cycle as a tool to insinuate yourself on my life I would not only feel angry but used. Don't forget that that blood chemistry will change in a few days and the initial response can be totally contrary to her actual feelings. The fact is women are hormonally driven to sex during certain times and if you use that as a way to make her feel committed to you that really is a small and manipulative method to get someone affections.

[the yang to the worlds yin]

LOL, i think your over-thinking this buddy. if she likes you, she's gonna like you no matter what time of the month it is.

[monsieur]

thanks

 

and carnelian, I don't think it is manipulative at all..... you make it sound like the woman is hopeless to her hormones that if timed right it is foolproof not to fail

 

well, the reality is, this is so important to me I just want everything to be perfect for the best chance..... .we've all had those kinds of days where if your mood is not perfect you might feel more rude or less friendly etc...... so what is wrong with trying to make sure every possible thing is right for the mood? this is very very important life changing stuff, if I make a move and fail, even if it is just because the day I chose she was in a grumpy mood, then that failure will carry over forever..... conversely, if I make a move on a day that she is in a positive mood and open and friendly feeling inside, and I get 'in' just a little bit more, this can carry over to better things and would be a start to something great

[lgirl]

generally speaking, 2wks before menstruation women's sex drive goes UP, UP, UP (it coincides with the body's last-ditch attempt to get pregnant that month!); one week/few days before menstruation you are just NOT interested in men, love, relationships (period! no pun intended!! lol). it's like you go off it as your womb starts breaking down its lining and bleeding starts (of course being raddled with painful water retention, swollen breasts, and your whole body generally s-l-o-w-i-n-g down + spotty outbreaks and mood swings kinda gets the majority of women out of the mood); during menstruation you feel closer to your partner and need lashings of TLC.

 

hope that answers your question

 

HOWEVER, it varies from woman to woman. you cannot 'get in' as you put it, depending on where a woman is in her cycle: she either likes you or she doesn't - you can't influence the outcome and any man who thinks he can get the better of a woman's menstrual cycle is a FOOL!! it's a loser's game, pal, LOL. these are hormonal changes we're talking about, not complete mind-personality changes.

[monsieur]

thanks lgirl, that is great information

 

so the TLC part during menstruation, if you are single and a guy you like is there for you at this time, and does something heartwarming, would you feel that there would be a better chance that he would touch your heart at this time? or no difference?

[CarnelianButterfly]

Is said woman still the one you've been obsessing over and has told you "JUST FRIENDS"?

[monsieur]

and your post answered something very important, you said just before that you would not be interested in relationships or men or anything.... .so this confirms what I thought.... if I tried a huge move at this point I am likely to fail and ruin everything

[lgirl]

you got it! but in order for you to 'track' the 'best' time you would have to obsessively chart her periods, monitor them for a few months to see what pattern her cycle has etc, and that is plain SCARY and TOO WEIRD for any man to do, no matter how interested he is in a girl. you would scare her off BIG time if you took that approach and look like a total PSYCHO. if i were you, i'd save this info for when you're in a r/shp and can show yr understanding to yr gf.

 

your intentions are too open to misinterpretation, which could really screw things up for you in the long term. i cannot emphasise enough how freaked out any woman would be to discover you'd been monitoring her periods.

 

capisce?

[monsieur]

ok thanks

 

actually she makes that part of it easy for me, because she is very open about it, she told me that she is pms-ing the last couple of days and that her period is coming this week... that is what got me thinking of it in the first place

[lgirl]

okay, one final bit of advice and i mean this in the nicest way: BACK OFF from her periods. it will irritate the hell out of her if you start getting involved in them. i used to have a friend who would tell me when he thought i was getting my period b/c he became fairly adept at knowing when. this would BUG me to death whenever he said it, so if you want to put her off you, keep going on about her cycle - you will talk yourself right out of a date!! lol. let her OWN her periods herself. let her initiate conversation about them, but if i were you unless you're in a long-term r/shp with a woman, stay out of it (i'm telling you for your own good!)

[monsieur]

thanks, and actually I hardly say a word back on the topic to her, she is the one that brings it up and actually goes on a bit about it

 

thanks for the advice though, I will definitely tread lightly if at all

 

and I will wait until after her 'pms' time and a little bit longer before making any 'bold moves'

 

 

thanks again

[Belgian girl]

also don't forget that a cyclus is not always 4 weeks mine are mostly 6weeks, so I guess I feel at my best (relationships, sexuality,..) in the middle, about 3 weeks after my menstruation I know that around the ovulation it's the perfect flirt-moment and time to feel who is a possible partner (slogan from Always )Good luck!

[iamteddybearfeelmecuddle]

If you feel your chances are so slim that you have to rely on a hormonal change in the woman of interest then you really need to reevaluate your goals in this relationship. Because frankly if I were the woman involved and found out you used my menstrual cycle as a tool to insinuate yourself on my life I would not only feel angry but used. Don't forget that that blood chemistry will change in a few days and the initial response can be totally contrary to her actual feelings. The fact is women are hormonally driven to sex during certain times and if you use that as a way to make her feel committed to you that really is a small and manipulative method to get someone affections.

 

I have to say I tend to agree with carnelian.

[monsieur]

Don't forget that that blood chemistry will change in a few days and the initial response can be totally contrary to her actual feelings.

 

 

that is exactly my reasoning though, I don't want to pick the 'bad day' and get the 'initial response ... contrary to her actual feelings'. I want a day when her actual feelings are not being clouded by anxiety or stress or feelings of not wanting intimacy.

 

If I come pour out my soul I don't want it to be at a time when her mood might be less receptive and take it the wrong way perhaps, just because she is on edge that day.

 

It's not a case of 'find a day when she is weak and vulnerable and trick her into something she doesn't want'... more just 'find a day where she is feeling good about herself and relationships' and hope to go from there on a good note

[CarnelianButterfly]

Female emotions are not totally driven by their cycle. Some women are more prone to hormonal fluctuations and emotional changes, but we are all DIFFERENT. This said: drop the menstruation crap, its not going to do anything but freak her out. Its not normal that you are even contemplating this.

[Dako]

I never noticed much change in women at that time, despite the hoopla about PMS and all that. I think most women just get in tune with the cycle and aren't emotionally bound by it.

[lgirl]

monsieur,

 

It's not a case of 'find a day when she is weak and vulnerable and trick her into something she doesn't want'... more just 'find a day where she is feeling good about herself and relationships' and hope to go from there on a good note

but that could be ANY day!!!! hormones do influence how we feel, but they don't CHANGE how we feel. ie the effects are only temporary. the point is if a girl isn't interested in you, her fluctuating hormone levels won't change that. also you cannot predict how a woman's going to feel: we are all different. i really think if you're relying on picking a 'good' day with this girl, then (sorry) but it sounds like you don't stand much of a chance in the 1st place. also, as i said before if she found out you were even taking this line, she would be seriously OFF YOU. you are barking up the wrong tree and making yourself sound freaky...

[OceanEyes]

Is there a point in the monthly cycle, or a range of time, when women feel more receptive to falling in love or becoming infatuated with a guy?

 

No.

 

Conversely, is there a part of the month where meet ups for the hope of love are much less likely to be successful?

 

No.

 

Do women long for love more the week before menstruation, or the week after? two weeks after?

 

No.

 

A woman's menstrual cycle, unless she's insanely imbalanced, will have absolutely no affect whatsoever on who/ why/ what/ where/ when she chooses to be in love.

 

A woman's personality and preferences WILL play a role.

[Dako]

As a guy, this seems odd to try and exploit such a minor influence.

To me the appearance of an aqua string showed Auntie Flo had arrived.

External events, like how a guy treats her, are more influencial.