could a one night stand blossom into real love

[ensign_19]

hi i am 23 yr old girl. i met a lovely guy (36 yrs) at a salsa club. he was the teacher and its the first time i have instantly been attracted to a guy. we danced and spoke for ages and there was incredible chemistry........it was electric. i am quite conservative and inhibited but i dont know what came over me that night.......i requested him to drop me home and we had such a great time chatting...........he was a gentleman and didnt make any moves on me (im used to guys just pouncing on me because i have been told i am exceptionally beautiful.....i get a lot of unwanted attention!) i even invited him up to my room ( i have never ever done this with a stranger! ever!) we spoke more and just melted into each others arms.......we made love and it was so intimate and beautiful. no other guy has ever made me feel this way or brought out the quailities that i saw in myself that night. i felt like i knew him a lifetime. he did everything right. he asked for my no. before he had to leave and has called me a couple of times requesting if i could meet with him again. he seemed such a nice and beautiful person.......i want to get to know him.

 

i want to so badly........i miss him. but im worried about what he might be thinking. would he just consider me for a physical relationship? considering i slept with him on the first night........is there a possibilty of a future together. i want a chance.. a chance for a serious relationship and love. do men think that girls who sleep with them on the first night are easy and dont consider them as a long term loving partner or want them as a girlfriend. are they judged as cheap.

[neolithic]

if i were you, i would take it very slowly. since you sorta gave away the physical mystery the first night.. i would suggest only going out every so often, just to dinner, maybe, and then making him drop you off. that way, it'll almost rebuild a mystery. he won't be able to really have you. he is a bit older though.... are you worried about that at all?

 

i don't think one night can make you into a "working girl," if you know what i'm saying.. especially if you do it right. personally, i've never had a one night stand turn into much else, but i can tell you this story.. there were strange circumstances (i was feeling a little bad about this guy i thought really liked me, but it wasn't moving forward... funny, the next day we started dating and became inseparable!). anyway, i went over to this guy's house and we had sex.. but he chased me for weeks after that, trying to make me his girlfriend. i was with the other guy, but, that might give you a male perspective on the one night stand. it doesn't ALWAYS have to be cheap.

 

but this guy is a salsa dancing teacher.. let's hope he's not one of those smooth 'latin lover' types that seduce you and make you think you're falling in love and blah blah blah.

 

the one thing i worry about the most, though, is the age difference.. it might not matter to you, though. but 13 years is a lot, especially when you're still so young.. but oh do i know the lure of the older man..

[ensign_19]

hi

i loved your reply. i know he isnt the smooth latin types because i did all the seducing ! he was very sweet. i absolutely agree with you about rebuilding a mystery because we have missed so many stages of love and courtship in between. as for older guys ....... all my past bf's have been atleast 10 yrs older than me. i seem to be attracted only to the older ones.

I hope something comes out of this........i like him so much. we are meeting up next week and its going to be so hard not to want to make love to him. i want that intimacy again but i guess that if i want some sort of relationship i have to withold. thanks so much for your message.

[shy_guy_3]

hmmm...seems kinda ummmm..interesting?

[orgasmictofu]

I have a friend who had a one night stand with a guy and ended up marrying him.

 

It's possible. I don't think it happens often, but it's possible.

 

Like it was said above, take it slow with him. Make your intentions clear.

[HellFrost666]

Yes, they can.

 

I had to reply to this because I know personally what can come from a one night stand.

 

I met my girlfriend through two friends of mine. The night I met her I was not looking for that. But there was a serious conection between us. She came home with me that night and we slept together. This was something so out of character for both of us. Neither had ever done the one night thing before.

 

Afterwards I was so confused. I wasn't sure what was going to come of it, and I was insanely infatuated with her. (This is actually why I came to this forum. I needed advice.)

 

But, that was nine months ago. I love this woman madly, and the feeling is very much mutual.

 

So yes, it can happen. Have faith.

[italianstalian]

umm.....if a girl gave it up to me the first night.....id probly lose all respect for her.................but i def call for some more.

[itsallgrand]

Sometimes they can.

 

Just be careful. Take it slow. I too worry about the age difference and the fact that you met under a teacher-student setting. You may feel you are pulling all the strings, but it never is so. He has his own life experience and intentions.

Not to sound harsh, but he has probably met many girls similiar to you. Being an instructor really teaches you a lot about human dynamics, and you pick up on who is looking for what.

 

Not trying to sound too alarmist, just being big-sisterly.

 

Good luck.

[Daddy Bear]

if he's not just a 'playa' (and only time will tell), it could turn out to be a good thing. my longest relationship started as a one-nighter and my deepest relationship had a 17-year age difference (23/41).

[HellFrost666]

umm.....if a girl gave it up to me the first night.....id probly lose all respect for her.................but i def call for some more.

 

Well How is it any different when a guy wants it the first night?

[Day_Walker]

Well I think you are confusing terms, this isnt a one night stand. A one night stand is sex and thats it, its more lust than emotion. What you had was sex the first night. It is possible that a relationship could develop it just depends what both of you want.