Lansing Posted April 11, 2006 Share Posted April 11, 2006 Whenever I hear a girl say "Oh, your so sweet" or "oh, how cute", or "you are so cute" or "that was so cute",etc, I now cringe! When I was younger, I thought it was a compliment, but, then I realized over time that some girls meant it like "oh my, you are so lame"..... With this recent girl I was dating I brushed her hair in the car (like.. stroked it a bit... kind of like petting a dog.. haha)..and she was like "ohh, that is sweet.. thank you" or something. I was kind of taken aback... and I was like "excuse me?" and she said "oh.. that was nice.. thanks...."..... Soo.. I took it later that she actually did enjoy it, and felt like it was a bit of "intimate" connection... But, still, when I hear girls say it, I think "oh no.. I just did something lame...." or "oh no, she doesn't know what to say so she said that".... I am curious to hear from girls and guys on this. Link to comment
goodquestion Posted April 11, 2006 Share Posted April 11, 2006 yeah, it means "ur so lame" ... always let the chick initiate contact, it's self control. If she hasn't touched you in anyway during a date, like brush up against you, touch your hand, something ... she's still not comfortable, and not totally interested in you. If you initiate touch before they do, it usually freaks them out, I mean 99.999999999% of the time it freaks them out ... later,peace Link to comment
Ross_K Posted April 11, 2006 Share Posted April 11, 2006 Seems like they basically see you as a nice guy. I've had that sort of stuff said to me before. Link to comment
iceberg21 Posted April 11, 2006 Share Posted April 11, 2006 yeah, it means "ur so lame" ... always let the chick initiate contact, it's self control. If she hasn't touched you in anyway during a date, like brush up against you, touch your hand, something ... she's still not comfortable, and not totally interested in you. If you initiate touch before they do, it usually freaks them out, I mean 99.999999999% of the time it freaks them out ... later,peace I disagree to a point. Not saying thats not ever true, but I've dated plenty of girls who don't really break the touch barrier, then out of nowhere say "Why haven't you kissed me yet?" So I think some forwardness has to be initiated by the guy in most repects. You don't need to go all out, but I mean open a door for her, put your hand on the small of her back and "lead" her so to speak. There's plenty of things a guy can do to initiate contact without going creepy. Link to comment
Lansing Posted April 11, 2006 Author Share Posted April 11, 2006 ohhh... I should have said that I had kissed this girl already..... Do some girls really want a "sweet" guy?"? Link to comment
Ross_K Posted April 11, 2006 Share Posted April 11, 2006 Some of them on the net say they do, but from my offline experience no girls seem to. Girls want someone who can protect them, someone who is a 'man'. They're not really going to want someone that they see as a sweet little puppy. Link to comment
Ash Posted April 11, 2006 Share Posted April 11, 2006 I always take that kind of comment at face value. If the girl doesn't mean it that way then she should be saying what she means, anything else is misleading. If girls are saying things like that when they think something you're doing is lame, then you're just not be straight up. Sometimes you can tell by the tone at which it is said. FWIW, from what I know, most girls love having their hair brushed and stroked. So I suspect her comments were genuine. Link to comment
SLMitchell918 Posted April 11, 2006 Share Posted April 11, 2006 A lot of girls love having their hair brushed or stroked - or pretty much anything that is thoughtful. I don't know a girl that doesn't. Things like that make them feel special. I've never said that to any partner as a lame comment. I think she meant it as though it was thoughtful of you and thank you. Link to comment
Markers Posted April 11, 2006 Share Posted April 11, 2006 it's all about how she says it, it's pretty obvious when it means good.. but many times you just get that fake smile and "oh so cute". Link to comment
orgasmictofu Posted April 11, 2006 Share Posted April 11, 2006 A lot of girls love having their hair brushed or stroked - or pretty much anything that is thoughtful. I don't know a girl that doesn't. I HATE having my hair touched. I got this intense hate from my mom. She never liked being touched on the head, it's demeaning she says, like patting a dog. As for the "aww, that's so cute" comments, if I say something is cute, I say it because it's true. It's not an insult, at all. Link to comment
heythere1234 Posted April 12, 2006 Share Posted April 12, 2006 I mean, I'm not putting you down so don't take it that way, but I really do think you're just overanalyzing terminology here, rather that looking at the big picture. Every woman has her own mannerisms and terminology that she uses. Me, I'm not really into the mushy crap so much. (I think that last one will probably get bleeped, but let's just say it rymes with brap,k?) But if she said it's sweet she probably thinks it's sweet. However, if it came accross forced, then maybe it was because your sudden-fly-by-hair-stroking, came out a bit abrupt and forced, too. And on the 'sweet' guy issue, I love men who are sweet to me, I just love men better who can do that and manage not to be effeminite while they're doing it. My mother and I share a theory on the whole "NICE GUY" issue. (This isn't directed to you necessarily, but you may want to keep this in mind when you hear another guy complain that he's "Too nice...") When a woman doesn't like a man (regardless of the reason), she wants to make him go away (ASAP), but doesn't want to make him angry in case he turns into a crazy stalker. So she tries to soften the blow by saying (you guessed it!) "You're a nice guy, but...". Look, maybe the guy is really a bitter angry creep, and not a nice guy at all. But she's not going to tell him so, because of her aforementioned fear of him turning into a crazy angry bitter stalker. So, you see guys if you're one who's been told "you're nice, but..." A LOT, you should stop complaining that women don't like nice guys, because I can assure you that we in fact do! The reality is probably that you are NOT nice. Link to comment
heythere1234 Posted April 12, 2006 Share Posted April 12, 2006 If the guy is bitter it's b/c he's been burned by freaking women in the past and thereforeeee has shunned the true niceness he may have had. lol, well it's kind of like which came first, the chicken or the egg! Link to comment
itsallgrand Posted April 12, 2006 Share Posted April 12, 2006 You have to go with your gut. Yeah, some women say all kinds of things that they don't mean or mean in a not so kind way. But it could be genuine, or just something to say. I know for myself, I like to talk a lot. A man may do something very sweet, and I'll want to say something...anything...to acknowledge it. Sometimes it comes out wrong, sometimes I should just shut up. You really do have to go with your gut and the person addressing you. Link to comment
TheWriter1 Posted April 12, 2006 Share Posted April 12, 2006 i hate stuff like that and know exactly how you feel, when i was young i used to think that was good so i did the brushing of hair all the time...wow big mistake... i cringe too when they say you're quite the charmer aren't you!! or you are the cutest!!! but then again im so paranoid of things like that going on that i haven't made the first move on a girl in a LONG time, probably missing out on a couple encounters...oh well no big deal Link to comment
yeawutever Posted April 13, 2006 Share Posted April 13, 2006 Do some girls really want a "sweet" guy?"? Hell yea, who would wnat to be treated like crap, I sure wouldn't. And if you're not gonna be nice, but show off and brag too much about yourself, or be a blabber-mouth type, then there would be one word only, OUT. Link to comment
Chika Posted April 15, 2006 Share Posted April 15, 2006 No Way,, i over use the word 'cute' & 'sweet' all the time. And personally i prefer cute and sweet guys they are so adorable seeeee hehehe. Link to comment
Luscious_Soup Posted April 15, 2006 Share Posted April 15, 2006 MEH!!! Of coarse its not a compliment!!! Being told "Oooh...your so sweet" is more like...What the hell are you doing? Link to comment
heythere1234 Posted April 15, 2006 Share Posted April 15, 2006 MEH!!! Of coarse its not a compliment!!! Being told "Oooh...your so sweet" is more like...What the hell are you doing? lol, That's just silly! Link to comment
Massari Posted April 16, 2006 Share Posted April 16, 2006 I say you did great on your date. especially if you have kissed that girl already which ppl seemed to have missed that! When I went on my first date with my GF she was telling me.. aww sweeet .. cute.. all this! I didn't touch her hair but I did touch the hand a little. and we didn't kiss until the 3rd date. but the "you are cute comment and you are sweet comments seemed like a compliment rather than ohhh back off now creep! dun worry about it you're doing great. Link to comment
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