omg... what the heck did i do wrong???

[sasha12]

I was seeing this guy for over a year. We were friends in the past and ageed that neither one of us wanted to be in a serious relationship at this time. I thought it was cool to have a good guy friend and we talked and hung out together quite a bit. I knew that he was seeing other people and at times I wanted the relationship to become more serious. I felt that someday we would make a really good match.

 

I wasn't going out with anyone else just mostly hangin out with him. We talked on the phone pretty much everyday. I was feeling lonely so I went to stay with a guy that I had knew before and ended up staying with him for over a week.

 

When I got home he was really pissed that I had been with someone else and refused to talk to me. Now he has moved some girl into house in only a matter of weeks and is having a seriously commited realtionship with her. I really don't understand. He got pissed when i was with someone else, he told me he didn't want a serious relationship with anyone, but now he has her living with him and they only knew each for a month. Where did I go wrong?

[Goodfun88]

It just wasn't meant to be. If he had really been into you, you guys would have been in a relationship a long time ago. Don't dwell on it, but remember if someone says they doesn't want a serious relationship right now, they may just be meaning they don't want a serious relationship with you. Good luck and I hope you find someone who is worth your time!

[RayKay]

Here are my thoughts on "what went wrong" in some possible scenarios:

 

1) It's not that he did not want a serious relationship - he just did not want one with you. If he did with you, it would of happened long ago.

 

2) He felt things were getting more serious between you two and becoming more exclusive, and then you went off with someone else for a week. Even though there was no formal agreement, he felt hurt by it and felt it was a betrayal.

 

2) He used you dating someone else as an excuse to end it, even though he was doing the same (do you know he was for sure)?

 

3) Assuming he was dating others, he decided what was good for the goose was not for the gander.

[SilverManic]

You either need to talk to him about it and tell him what you've told us, or forget about him. The thing is with some people it's one rule for them and another for you but it shouldn't be like that. I'm sorry this happened to you, I hope you feel better soon.

Take care and good luck,

~S.

[Süsser Tod]

I think there is more to the story than what you said on that short post, and the timeframe is not very detailed.

 

I do think that he wanted a relationship with you, but that initial agreement of not wanting a relationship got in the way. His attitude after you spent a week with the other guy shows that he felt more than being your friend, and don't know why, but the new girl sounds like a rebound.

[annie24]

Sasha - I remember some of your previous posts about this relationship and it seemed like there were a lot of things wrong. There seemed to be a lot of conflict from the beginning. Maybe you should go back and re-read all your posts.

 

I agree with a previous poster - maybe things just weren't meant to be with this man.

[sasha12]

i liked him alot but just never said it because i knew he was playing the field. i just don't understand how he could move her in so quickly. they have only known each other a few weeks. i really felt that he was the guy for me and i wanted to just be friends for awhile to make that we really like each other. i was only gone for one week.

[annie24]

i liked him alot but just never said it because i knew he was playing the field. i just don't understand how he could move her in so quickly. they have only known each other a few weeks. i really felt that he was the guy for me and i wanted to just be friends for awhile to make that we really like each other. i was only gone for one week.

 

In my opinion.... the cold hard truth is that he probably didn't like you as much as you liked him.

 

I think you should have been more clear about your intentions of having a serious relationship early on. Don't settle for less than you want.