Once in a while I feel disgusted by my g/f, is that normal??

[carefreebear_so]

Hey, all

Okay, so it's been 3 years relation so far and though I do still love her, part of me wants me to just leave her and get all my stuff. At the beginning I didn't feel this way, she was just everything I look for, sweet, outgoing, understable, lister, curious. Now I dunno, this image is gone ever since last year when it happened. Basically last year, one time she came so drunk, I mean overly drunk, and got all trashy, well I thought it's normal to people to at times get that way, thought I never do, but oh well. And then the unexpected, I got screamed and then punched multiple times, then one came right in my eyes, which got black the next day. , totally shocked and sad afterwards. I was thinking "damn what did I do to deserve, what", I was thinking that maybe I must be a failure, a loser. She did apologize the next day, well I wanna to leave right there and get all my things, but since she beg me not to, that it wasn't gonna happened again, that she was drunk, and well since I so madly in love (she's my first g/f anyways, the only serious relation I had), I just thought ok, I'll give her one more chance.

One year later noe, I still can't get over it and at times I'm even disgusted by her. Like at first, I was okay by it, I thought that well it was just a stupid mistake, but now I dunno, it's like it's really starting to kick in and now I'm still feeling like getting all my stuff and leaving. Yet at the same time I don't want to, I love her.

Ok, help, what do I do? Leave now, but I'm a love!!!!!!!!

[DN]

If she has never done that sort of thing again but has been a great girlfriend then it is time you properly forgive her and got past this. I understand how hurt and humiliated you were and would not have blamed you had you left her at the time. But you did not and to do so now would hardly be fair. And it might also be something you would regret if you love her.

 

If this continues to haunt you and you cannot let it go, then maybe you should try some couple's counselling.

[carefreebear_so]

Yes, unfortunately I madly in love. I know it was only that one time, but it's like that image I had in her is gone. I mean, you treat that person good, you're nice, and well you expect the same from them. I'm guessing any guy would have left her already, would not have put up with it.

But yea, I have though about couple couseling, planning to talk to her about it.

[DN]

This is a cliché, but no one is perfect and in any relationship there comes a time when you realise that. For you, it happened in a somewhat traumatic way. But now you know that she is just like the rest of us and has imperfections - what is important is that you look past the imperfections, the mistakes and that one incident to the person that she is beyond all that. The person you love is still there.

[SilverManic]

I agree with DN, we all make mistakes. Everyone deserves a second chance. She hasn't done it again, alchol makes people do stupid things.

~S.

[heythere1234]

I think it was a one time thing, and you're still resentful over it because it never got resolved for you. You all should try couples counseling as somone said, or maybe you just go alone to get help getting over it. but if you can't get over it, then you should maybe just get out. No one's perfect and if it was only that one thing, then a lot worse has been done by better women.

[itsallgrand]

Do you ever feel afraid of her? Is your relationship good overall - just this resentment ?

 

It really depends on how you feel. One year is a long time. Why is it you have not been able to truly forgive her ?

 

How old are the two of you?