Why women say...

[mikeoutthere]

That they want a man who is sensitive, but do not understand that someone who is gentle and thoughtful can also get hurt very easy when his feeling are not returned or betrayed by the one he trusts ?...and also being sensitive thus not mean being weak, it is just a way how someone relates with others and his perception of the distinction between right and wrong, his responsibility to someone he cares about and harm that he can cause to others…Has nothing to do with acting like a wimp in need of attention who just wants a someone to unload the responsibility for himself on her…What do you think ???

[yeawutever]

Wow, I got caught off guard on that one. I don't really know. All I can say is that it depends on the girl. People vary in their likes and tastes.

[CarnelianButterfly]

I don't think being sensitive is being weak. I've seen the macho guys go at their c*ck fights over women, sports, or whatever. I'd much rather have the guy who'se patient and willing to discuss things calmly and like an adult. I think being sensitive means you are very aware of how others feel and that effects you. I also think sensitive people can have a great affect on others. Like you said, being sensitive also means you're more prone to hurt. They really are both definitions of sensitive, but that really doesn't mean all emotionally perseptive people are emotionally touchy, or vice versa. Many people think they go hand in hand, but I think there are a lot of easily offend people that have no clue how to relate to the emotions of others.

[BillyJean714]

I dated two guys in the past who were considered sensitive. Just because sensitive is a trait that a person admires and looks for in a partner, doesn't mean that sensitive will be the same for everyone. People are so complex in their personalities, likes/dislikes that it really depends on the bond/chemistry that two people feel towards one another.

 

Guy #1 - I had a crush on was sensitive. Once I got to know him, I didn't really like him because he had a "crowd pleaser" mentality that I didn't like, but he was a good person.

 

Guy #2 - was also sensitive. I liked him more because we had similar values.

 

It really depends on each of the individual persons involved and how many things in common they share with one another other than just being sensitive.

[Momene]

Being a sensitive bloke is very hard, although I guess it's easier in the US than England. Seems to work well being a dad, though.

[friscodj]

Welcome to ENA mikeoutthere!

 

You're trying to figure out women...which is like trying to figure out the meaning of life...

 

OK Mike, what's really going on? What is motivating you to ask such a question? Have you been hurt recently because you were considered too sensitive? We can help you with a specific situation, but a profound question like the one you asked is too much for anyone!

[GottaLetItBurn]

Umm dude this is one of the realizations a young man has when he tells all his friends that he doesn't understand woman and kicks himself because he thought he did. Then all his friends say to him that they still don't understand their girlfriends.

 

The thing about it is that men will never understand woman, or you will probably find one in your life and marry her. Woman are mans greatest challange. Even the guys that get all the girls don't get them, so don't be frustrated.

 

I do know one thing for sure, all of it is going to confuse you if you don't understand this one concept about relationships.

 

It's all a game, you have to play it right. If you suck up to a girl too much than your not a challange, and she will dump you. You just got to get into her emotions and she'll do what you want.

[TheFallenShadow]

Heck i am older and still dont understand the ways of a woman's heart, i thought i understood, but that was foolish on my part. A womans heart is like the ocean, and with it, it changes from moment to moment, and so sometimes, it is heard to understand when they say things that hurt you and they dont realize it, or they do realize it and do so because they know they can. As for them not understanding, well i think at times both genders do things, or say things, that neither understand, which leads to so many misunderstandings and misgivings that shouldnt not have been in the first place.

The best thing to do is have open lines of cimmunications with each other, but dont ever be made to feel less then you are. Because if you do, then you have given the other person the power to do so.

[eleanorrigby1]

I think women have it written into their DNA to not know what the f**k they want! I am a woman myself! lol! We change our minds so often, depending on our mood, how much sleep we had, our period!

 

We can be so contradictory! I think women generally say they want a sensitive man in touch with their feminine side, but as these types of men are so rare we have limited experience with them and so are kind of lost when faced with one, we don't know how to take it.

 

Its like a woman who goes out with horrible bastards and complains she wants a nice guy, she eventually meets a nice guy and she complains he is boring..

 

We say we want a man to be a man! we want rescuing, a handsome prince, and then we accuse them of being sexist! lol!

 

We say we want chivalry but then say that by opening the door for us you are being patronising! We say we want equal rights, equal pay, but then say its the man's DUTY to pay for dinner.

 

I think as humans we can't be figured out and sometimes we dont want something, or someone just 'because'.

 

I have broken up with a guy in the past, he was lovely, handsome, sweet, kind and adored me, and yet I just didn't want him, it didnt feel 'right' I broke his heart not maliciously but I am sure he will hate me forever, he cried and I felt awful but I couldn't explain to you why I didnt love him or make him feel any better about the fact. I am sure he went away wondering what he had done wrong, or what he hadn't done right.

 

Basically if you just be yourself, the right girl will come along eventually

[RayKay]

I agree with BillyJeans comments above though..

 

Just because sensitive is a trait that a person admires and looks for in a partner, doesn't mean that sensitive will be the same for everyone. People are so complex in their personalities, likes/dislikes that it really depends on the bond/chemistry that two people feel towards one another.

 

It really depends on each of the individual persons involved and how many things in common they share with one another other than just being sensitive.

 

My boyfriend is what I consider a sensitive sort, he considers himself the same. I actually DO love that aspect of him, and no I do not consider him whimpy at all.

 

I think it makes us very compatible actually, as I am sensitive as well, and we have a very good understanding in that sense of one another's personality and feelings. What I love about us is we both are very compassionate, respectful and thoughtful of one another and share similar priorities and outlooks on life.

 

However he also has a whole complexity/personality to him that is what is attractive and compatible with me, not just that he is sensitive. Sometimes you can't explain it, it just all has to fit and feel right. And it's not just girls/women whom require that, I know plenty of men whom need that "rightness" too!

[shyanne]

being sensitive doesn't mean your weak.... it means your a great person and you care about others... don't let anyone tell you anything different

[Shadows Light]

To the OP. Sensitivitiy does not equate to weakness. And if your GF, lady love said u were weak... I am sure there may be "OTHER" issues at play here asside from your caring sweet nature.

 

For instance... If your sensitivity extends to feeling sorry for someone elses plight that you'll clean out your bank account to help somone else in need.. while your BILLS are due.. I'd say.. your sensitivity is a problem.

 

If your sensitivitiy extends to helping others more than yourself or your own family.. I"d say you have a problem. ie.. they always tell you on airplanes to put on your AIR MASK first and then help someone else with thiers.

 

Whats really missing is what exactly is the nature of the problem or issue. What was said.

 

Sometimes we get hung up on the semantics on ONE SENTENCE someone utters and we miss the whole context in which it was said.

 

Grin... and aye, I am a women.. and I am prone to change my mind. Many times. My perogative. Data changes all the time... as data comes in... it is synthesized and analysed.. stuff will change accordingly.

[friscodj]

For some reason, I really like this post! I feel a lot of personal truth in it perhaps...

[BillyJean714]

Being sensitive isn't a bad thing. The most important thing to look at is how well two people 'click' together. There will be women who are a bit more insensitive, and some guys like that. There will be women who are sensitive, some guys like it, some don't.

 

There's always a person for everyone.

 

This post reminds me of a story that I heard about before. It was about this interacial couple. The guy was a color blinded caucasian guy, who married an African American lady who was blind. It was cute because they both appeared to be very sensitive, and they were just so right for each other. Anyway, thought it was a cute story.

 

No sweat. Just don't think about you being sensitive or not. You just have to be YOU. If a girl can't accept it, her loss.

[yeawutever]

We say we want a man to be a man! we want rescuing, a handsome prince, and then we accuse them of being sexist! lol!

 

We say we want chivalry but then say that by opening the door for us you are being patronising! We say we want equal rights, equal pay, but then say its the man's DUTY to pay for dinner.

 

Lol, nice post. Oh yea, reminds me of Cinderella, pure fantasy. If we were to base on that story, it would suggest we do nothing, just lay there waiting for Mr. handsome to come by and knock on the door, and just basically depend on him.

As for the dinner, I think it would apply equal, if it's $60 for two people, then both of you bring $30 and just use it for yourself!!!!!!

Back to reality check!!!! What guy would want a poor needy girl who depends on him. Same thing applies to use girls, why would I want a need guy!!!!!!!!

[Skippy]

Women want what they cannot get.

Women take for granted what they have

Isnt that what men are like to?? It is nature.

I suppose that it is game that is played. Give them a little to taste and then dont give any.

It is a teasting game

Sensitivity doesnt mean weak, but i can mean that people will evenually lose respect for you when they think you are too sensitive.

[AntiLove_SuperStar]

Do you mean.. that women who want a sensitive man should also respect the fact that he can get hurt easily and should tread extra carefully..I agree with you.

Its not so good if one partner is a lot more sensitive than the other.

[ajaxajax]

I also like the post from eleanorrigby1. I may not be a woman but maybe it could be true about them.

 

Sad thing is the post also states that women may not actually be truthful within themselves about what they really want out of a man. And being a man yet to have a gf, it also enraged me a bit because I get all those suggestions like

- you have to be a tanned, tall muscular model or sports star to make women love you and want to be with you

- or you have to be wealthy to make them see you as a worthy partner

- or you'll be seen as a man only if you can "fund them, fight over them and (make love to) them with the best um equipment" better than any other male

 

I know deep down in my own heart that women would be horrified for me to suggest that falling for such men are locked within their own DNA, but it just keeps happening among people I know and in the media. And I'm also considered quite attractive, stocky/muscular, on my way to a very well paid profession, tough (if necessary) and kind hearted. Feminism has happened in many places but I feel many women still fall for those stereotypes of men. Feminism also made me confused about whether it is revenge against literally every man over the mistakes of other men made against women.

 

I would say that women not being truthful within themselves - whether or not part of their DNA - is the biggest reason why I still feel bitter about women in general and the setbacks I'd need to go through in life just to have them see me in a good light!

[Momene]

Might I also suggest that the girls you've come accross are rather shallow. They're not all like that but, unfortunately some are. Also many men are, too.

 

The shallow ones can have each other!

[ajaxajax]

Momene, damn straight I suppose. I feel shallowness is rampant among women - but unfortunately for me and for women, it's even more rampant among men. Couldn't understand why the heck good decent women go out with AND MARRY very shallow men who appear decent! Wouldn't call them men, I would call them monsters!

[Momene]

Momene, damn straight I suppose. I feel shallowness is rampant among women - but unfortunately for me and for women, it's even more rampant among men. Couldn't understand why the heck good decent women go out with AND MARRY very shallow men who appear decent! Wouldn't call them men, I would call them monsters!

Sometimes it's difficult to see through people. Some people have learned how to turn on the charm but there's just no depth to them underneath. Some people develop depth as they get older. I like to think I have.

 

Good luck.