What do you guyz reckon???

[KandiBabe]

I'm just curious what you guys think about this.

 

I am quite... unique in the "love" department. I tend to see guyz as more toys then actually like them. I don't like sweet guys I find that really boring. Most guyz know me more as a "sex toy" even though I'm a virgin. I don't really care because well just because of the way I've been brought up (lolz my cousin). I pretty much go out with guyz then get bored of them and dump them. I don't know why I get bored I think it's because I just like variety. I tried staying single and was quite happy single until my friends got me with this guy I like but I wasn't quite ready to lose my singel-ness and now it feels sorta like I've lost my freedom. I still like the guy but well yeah. Also I tend to get things from guys then get rid of them. My ex gave me a present (it was goregous) but then I dumped him 5 days later but that was because I was bored and well yeah. What do you guys recon about all this, this is my first thread by the way so I hope I did ok lolz.

 

Luv Ya All

 

ME

[tmp0620]

I reckon you're 14 and you've got a lot to learn. Things will change with you guaranteed.

 

A lot of people go through b/f's or g/f's quickly because they are afraid of being dumped or rejected and are protecting themselves from that pain. Is that what you're doing? I have no idea.

 

What did you expect us to think about this?

[mystik]

I reckon you're 14 and you've got a lot to learn.

 

Ditto...

 

You can't treat people as objects, because they're not. If you don't like them, don't use them for things. You should take a closer look at yourself and wonder why you get bored. Maybe it's not them, but you. Are you scared or insecure about really genuinely liking a guy? Maybe you dump them first because you're afraid they'll get to know you and then they'll dump you.

 

You don't seem to find anything wrong just dumping guys as if they have no feelings, especially after getting gifts from them... maybe you should start caring about these people's feelings.

 

You have a pretty 'nonchalent, whatever, noncaring' attitude about your reputation as well dumping people. Getting dumped hurts, whether you think so or not. In fact, you seem pretty proud about being "unique" like this.

 

I'm not trying to bash you, but you're asking what we think...so there you have it. We can't make you less bored...

 

So yeah, What did you expect us to think about this?

[tmp0620]

"You have a pretty 'nonchalent, whatever, noncaring' attitude about your reputation as well dumping people"

 

Yes... could this attitude maybe be a cover up? Maybe something to hide behind? You feel like you have to be in control or someone might take advantage of you?

 

Like Mystik, I don't want to bash you but being insecure with yourself, having low self esteem, being afraid of commitment or whatever other issues you may have, they are never an excuse to treat other people like "toys".

 

Take a step back and be willing to criticize yourself.

 

I have a sneaky suspicion that you may have posted this for a laugh, but I have a feeling some of these things may hit home.

[KandiBabe]

No I did not just do this for a laugh, no i am not scared of being dumped, it makes no difference to me, no i am not insecure and no i do not appreciate being critised.

[Kitz]

Hey, I used to have the same problem. When I was in my 15 I was a full afraid-of-commitment-party-girl... I didnt exactly think of guys as "toys" as such, (although there were a few times... like hooking up with 3 - 4 guys in the same night, i'd hook up with one, get bored and then just move on to a new person), and if I ended up liking someone enough to actually go out with them, i'd end up getting bored, feel trapped and frustrated, like i'd lost my freedom (as you said) and every single relationship, for some weird reason, lasted exactly 3 weeks before I couldnt stand it anymore and broke up with them.

 

I think my problem was that I craved the excitement of meeting/hookup up with someone new, I liked the variety and meeting new people is (always) alot easier when you're single! I had more time to spend with friends and for myself.. Eventually I ended up getting a bit of a skanky reputation (and luckily for me & my reputation people didnt know the half of it) and on new years I made a resoloution to end it. ;D

 

I was trying to figure out why I was like this (that?) and I thought what it all came down to is that when I was 15 I got really drunk and lost my virginity to this guy 9 years older than me (yes, really REALLY gross, I know.. I didnt even know that we were doing it until halfway through) and, by some really gross reason I started liking him and became "bedbuddies" with him, he proceeded to string me along and then one day I walked in on him screwing my friend at a party and it fully messed me up.

 

I dont know if the other posters here are right about you but they're right about me; I know I was really insecure, had low self esteem, and never let myself really get close to anyone because I was afraid of them doing the same thing to me. Has anyone messed you around in the past?

 

All I can say is that you'll grow out of it... I stuck to my NYR and now i'm with this absoloutley amazing guy who I love, and i've been with him for ages now And as for your dillema... I say if you like being single and that works for you, stay single! If you like the guy there is such a thing as friends with benefits, you know. ;D haha.

[mystik]

No I did not just do this for a laugh, no i am not scared of being dumped, it makes no difference to me, no i am not insecure and no i do not appreciate being critised.

 

You asked us what we thought, so we told you. It wasn't meant to be only critism, they were suggestions as we didn't have much to go on.

 

What did you want us to say? Good for you? We were trying to help to see why you did this, because you asked. You asked for an opinion, and now are angry because it's not what you wanted. Most people aren't cool with being seen as a sex toy, yet you don't care at all. In fact, you don't seem to care about much.

 

Seriously, what did you want us to say?

 

Bottom line is, you can't help the fact that you get bored. Sure, enjoy being single, it's certainly fun and at your age, you SHOULD be having fun...You should be enjoying life to the fullest, meeting as many people as you can.

 

but do NOT take things from guys and just dump them because you feel like they are your TOYS. NO ONE is a toy. People have feelings.

[Tesseract_Witch]

Wow, you sound like the female version of the male stereotype. Interesting. But, I agree with IronLion85; you have to develop a commitment that you intend to keep. Human creatures lives, not soil, is being exhausted here!

[Tesseract_Witch]

Indeed, this is one of those things that aggravates me exceptionally; how can you ask for an opinion, and not anticipate some CONSTRUCTIVE criticism? Not all criticism is negatively implied, but when it is, it is stated for a reason. You must be much younger than me than I thought. Odd, I was 14 a mere ten days ago. Or otherwise you are far too oblivious as to get out of your own way to allow those attempting to assist you do so. Do not take this the wrong way, it is not intended to be an affront to you, merely enlightenment. Be open-minded and be wary of other people--even if they are dry as bone.

[KandiBabe]

Thanx!!! You post means alot to me, it's really helpful!!!!!

 

And to the other peoples I didn't mean I acrually use them, I do care about there feelings, I try to do it in the nicest way, one of my exes got really upset nd I was bawling for ages so I do care about what they feel and I do try and give them a good reason, what I meant was I just go through a lot of them and get bored easily.

 

Luv Ya All

 

ME

[Momene]

Right, at 14 I'd never even dated. It isn't an age to expect lifelong commitment. After all, you'll change a lot in the next 10 years. When someone comes along who you'll want to stick with, you'll soon know.

 

Good luck.