arguing in public and at home

[SeaBisquit]

Is it normal to have alot of little agruments in a relationship over little things that don't mean much?

[Scout]

Hmmm...that's really subjective, we'd have to understand what you term as "little" and "don't mean much."

 

But based on the title of your post...have you ever seen the SNL skit "The Couple That Should Divorce" lol...they constantly argue in public.

[robowarrior]

A lot of people constantly put darkness and hatred into eachothers lives. Small arguments can lead to BIG break ups. Do you go into a relationship with the thought 'im with this person so he/she can make me unhappy?' Nope, we should live for eachothers happyness and not for eachothers misery, and thats 'essensially a BIG thing' right? Well thereforeeee only put LOVE and LIGHT into eachothers lives, i want you to read betty eadie's near death experience , she really had an amazing insight on this link removed its really worth reading, and if you read plz tell me what you think.

[SeaBisquit]

LOL.... no Scout I haven't but I apreciate your good humor!

[SeaBisquit]

ok so here are the little things we agrue about.

 

1. we go grocery shopping I buy the wrong flavor of juice. I was suppose to buy pineapple. I bought bananna-pineapple.

2. I make him coffee. the coffee has coffee grinds in it.

3. he doesn't like how i use the tube of toothpaste.

4. he doesn't like the smell of my hairspray

5. I walk to slow

6. I talk to much

 

 

there are alot more but those are just some examples...

[sasha12]

If he argues with you over alot of little things imagine what it will be like when he argues with you over big things.

[SeaBisquit]

I believe that all relationships have disagreements it is hard for two people two agree on everything. However, for someone to constantly critisize or humiliate you in public is not consider normal behavior.

[shes2smart]

1. we go grocery shopping I buy the wrong flavor of juice. I was suppose to buy pineapple. I bought bananna-pineapple.

2. I make him coffee. the coffee has coffee grinds in it.

3. he doesn't like how i use the tube of toothpaste.

4. he doesn't like the smell of my hairspray

5. I walk to slow

6. I talk to much

 

Wow. You're right, that's all little stuff and not worth constant bickering.

 

Coupla possibilities:

 

1. He's a very nit-picky person and has to have everything just so (his way).

 

2. It's not about the juice, coffee, toothpaste, hairspray, etc. It's about power & control. As in, he wants the power & control. (wants things his way)

 

3. You're not compatible with each other.

 

4. As my therapist once told me, "Some people just like to b****" (or complain, or argue, or bicker)

 

So, if you like being nit-picked & controlled or you like to argue all the time, this could be the ideal relationship for you.

 

If you don't like any of those things (and I don't think there are many people who truly like being nit-picked over small stuff), then you either try to work it out or you move on to someone else who is more accepting of you as you are.

[brando]

I once read that if you expect arguments to be a normal part of a realtionship then they will.

 

I think that the things he argues about are an outlet for something else. Have you two tried any type of counselling ????

 

 

It sounds like there is a communication problem. Saying things mean and not saying what he means.

 

It isn't normal to argue like this, it will destroy the love between you two.

[Scout]

Was he single for a long time before you two got together? I know that when I've been single for an extended period of time, it's hard to adjust to the fact I have to accommodate a new person. I mean, even down to the coffee, yes. My boyfriend likes it strong and I've commented on that, and I also told him he walks too fast, lol.

 

But if you truly feel that he picks on you a great deal, don't ignore that feeling. Talk to him about it.