friendsforlife Posted February 21, 2006 Share Posted February 21, 2006 well i just writing this cus this will be the last thing i say or do. im now going to end my life for the best, to all my friends dont cry just be happy, i love yous all but i just dont want yous to see me down like i am now, i have been faking a smile fo a long time hoping i will feel better soon but i am worse than ever. i have the gun ready now i just need to pull the triger. there is nothing in this world that can make me happy again, im sick of crying every night, im sick of been like this, im sick of life, so i love yous all, good bye Link to comment
Dako Posted February 21, 2006 Share Posted February 21, 2006 Why? You just got here! At least tell us your story first. What's the rush? Link to comment
Mrocza Posted February 21, 2006 Share Posted February 21, 2006 Why are you sick of life? Since you're here to say good bye I think you owe us an explaination. Nothing is so bad that you have to end your life- NOTHING. Believe me. It's a permament solution to a non-permanent problem. Maybe you're really depressed, maybe you hate your life, but a lot of people get down. A lot of people have problems...and a lot of people have contemplated the same choice- and decided against it. You are a valuable person. You were put on this earth for a reason, privilaged with so many things, and although life may have had it's setbacks and you may not have gotten a winning hand, you have no right to decide to end your life. That is not part of life. You've probably been this low befroe. And you've probably been this low for a long time...and you know what? If you let yourself, you'll KEEP feeling this low. Believe me, I know. It's hard, but you have to face the fact that it starts with you and it won't change without YOU. You need to be around to do that. We'll be here to support you 110% in every aspect except this one. This is not the answer. You are worth more than this!! You have people who love you, people you love. You have that real smile lurking underneathe ready to come out- if you give us a chance, give YOURSELF that chance, you'll be pleasantly surprised. Link to comment
Scout Posted February 21, 2006 Share Posted February 21, 2006 But that's what friends are for...to be there and support you when you're NOT happy. Do you feel your friends won't or can't support you? What about your family? Are you really going to just end your life without even turning to someone in your family and simply saying, "I need you right how. I'm at a very low point, and just can't do this on my own. I need your support." Because let me tell you, if you don't do that AND you kill yourself, forever after your family and friends will wonder why you didn't come to them first. They'll never, ever get that out of their head. Is that really the kind of anguish you want to put them through? It sounds like you actually care about these people. I'm sure you don't want them to hurt for the rest of their lives. But if you're having a hard time expressing some of these things to them, maybe you could run it by us first. No one here knows you, your secrets are safe with us. Maybe if you just explain a little bit about what you're going through, we can give some objective feedback. I hope you will. I really, really do. Link to comment
theantibarbie23 Posted February 21, 2006 Share Posted February 21, 2006 Please think about what you are doing. I tried to commit suicide on more than one occasion as a teenager and if I had suceeded I would of missed out on so many wonderful experiences... I am so greatful that I wasn't successful now. You might think things would be better for you this way but depression often keeps us from seeing anything other than the immediate pain. It's not worth it. Link to comment
Meow18 Posted February 21, 2006 Share Posted February 21, 2006 Please tell us your story. At least give us a chance. Maybe just maybe we can help you. Link to comment
ShySoul Posted February 21, 2006 Share Posted February 21, 2006 Talk to us. We want to know what the problem is. What's going on in your life? Why do you feel this way? On many occasions I have wanted to be done with life. Figured no one cared about me and that nothing I did mattered. I figured that if I was to die, no one would even care. Life was empty and cold. I walked alone for a long time. But I saw that there is always hope. There is always a better day coming. Whatever has you down, don't let it get you this depressed. Talk to us about it and we can help you. Honestly, this site saved me when I fault as you do. Give us a chance to help you out. Link to comment
friendsforlife Posted February 21, 2006 Author Share Posted February 21, 2006 my dad died when i was younger, my sis has depression, mum is very sick, family is all over the place (on drugs and all) and the dont want anything to do with me, i cut my self i feel nothing anymore, i cant tell me family or friends i dont want them seeing me down like this i dont want to be remembered for the chick that was depressed all the time Link to comment
Scout Posted February 21, 2006 Share Posted February 21, 2006 Well, you won't always be the "chick who is depressed all the time" if you start to work on that. It sounds to me like you feel you've sort of exhausted the resources of your friends' support. And that you don't have family members to turn to. In other words, you need a solid support system in place, and that's a little shaky right now. Certainly the folks here at eNotalone can provide some of that for you. Like I said, it's a great place to come and talk with others. But also, I'm wondering if you've talked to a counselor or teacher at school who can give you some much-needed adult support. Have you? Link to comment
Meow18 Posted February 21, 2006 Share Posted February 21, 2006 So, are you wanting to do this for you, or for your family? Because honestly, I can't see your family being happy about it. In fact, it might just make things worse for them. First having to deal with the loss of your father, and then the loss of you. And if you are doing it for yourself, what about your family? Do you think it's going to help your sister's depression? Trust me, life will get better. Everyone has obstacles. So many people have felt like giving up more than once. But you have to be strong. You have to find something worth living for. Do you get a long with your sister? You should try to develop a good relationship with her cause from the sounds of it, you both need each other. And do yourself a favor and get help. Find someone you trust and talk to them about how you feel! If you end your life now, you will be remembered as the girl who was depressed. What else would anyone remember about you? Depression is usually what leads to suicide. We are here to help you. Please talk to us and really consider this. We will always be here for you. Link to comment
friendsforlife Posted February 21, 2006 Author Share Posted February 21, 2006 yes i have but it did nothing. so it would be for the best if i end my life, to stop me from al this pain i feel inside Link to comment
friendsforlife Posted February 21, 2006 Author Share Posted February 21, 2006 i cant tell my sis i dont want to bring her done even more, she already doesnt eat and is realli skinny. im doing it for me and them coz i dont want them seeing me like this and i can take this pain i feel anymore Link to comment
Scout Posted February 21, 2006 Share Posted February 21, 2006 Do you mind if I ask for more details on who you've talked to about your depression and inner pain? What they said, what they suggested? Link to comment
Mrocza Posted February 21, 2006 Share Posted February 21, 2006 You've been through a lot. You have family problems, and no one's family life is perfect, I can vouch for that. However, that is no reason to give up hope for YOURSELF. Even if you don't want to tell your friends about your problems, how do you think they feel? Do you think they're in this friendship just for the good times? I'm positive they would stand behind you 100% and support you through this tough time. Thats what friends are for. Everyone has problems- it's no reason to want to end your life. Think fo all the things you've accomplished, the good things you've done, the good memories- granted, there have been bad ones too - we all know that or we wouldnt be here at enotalone But it's all a part of life. Maybe you don't want to admit you have a problem to your friends but trust us, there is no such thing as a problem-free life. Depression is a common thing, and although you may be embarrassed it's a serious issue. It matters too. If you need a friend to talk to about anything, you have all of us here on enotalone totally on your side. We care about you because you ARE important. Believe me. Link to comment
friendsforlife Posted February 21, 2006 Author Share Posted February 21, 2006 i went to the mental health place and they just bored me and made me feel worse. i cant member wot they said, i think it was something like this "your still young go out hang out with your friends, make life the most of it" but it didnt help Link to comment
Mrocza Posted February 21, 2006 Share Posted February 21, 2006 Go see a counsellor. Go to your family doctor and get a referral to a psychiatrist/psychologist. Link to comment
friendsforlife Posted February 21, 2006 Author Share Posted February 21, 2006 sorry i cant take it no more, im ended my life now. sorry Link to comment
KissMe_KillMe Posted February 21, 2006 Share Posted February 21, 2006 i am sorry about everything, but seriously dont be dumb!!! i am not gonna be exactly nice like everyone else.. i hate "suicidals" its just plain retarded! i know things are going bad and all but thats a really pathetic reason to shoot yourself in the head... take a look in the mirror and ask yourself what the * * * * your doing! dont be another teen stratedgic. Link to comment
Scout Posted February 21, 2006 Share Posted February 21, 2006 It sucks when we're younger and the adults in our life let us down, or can't give us the help we need when we're struggling with feelings of sadness. Unfortunately, I can personally attest to this, as I was basically on my own as a teenager. I often thought about killing myself, too. It all seemed so hopeless. I couldn't imagine that one day I would be a happier person. But something kept me from doing that. A little inner voice, something...kept telling me that good things were in store for my life. And you know what? That little voice was right. I'm not saying I didn't go through years of struggle. I sure did. But I got through it and I learned I'm a survivor. What's more, it gave me an incredible amount of empathy and compassion towards others - people and animals. Today, I'm very involved in animal rights issues, but I also like to think I've made a difference in some people's lives from time to time. Who knows? Maybe one day you'll do something for someone that will completely change the way they think about something and this will make a profound effect in some way. You play a key role on this planet, and as you get older, your purpose and what makes you really happy will be revealed to you. There is a great deal still to unfold in your life. Stick out these hard times. I know you have the strength to do so. It will be worth it, I promise. I'm not saying it won't be hard as hell sometimes - like now - but you've got more strength then you realize. And you can always, always talk to us here about your problems. If we didn't care, we wouldn't be here. It's as simple as that. And maybe at some point, you'll help someone else here that comes to this site. Link to comment
Scout Posted February 21, 2006 Share Posted February 21, 2006 sorry i cant take it no more, im ended my life now. sorry So nothing we're saying is helpful at all? Are we boring you too like the mental health place did? If so, I'm very sad to hear that. The people on here really care, and it seems you don't see that. And you don't see that your friends care...or your family...you just want to do your thing, even if it breaks a lot of hearts. I truly hope you change your mind about that. You're not just hurting yourself - you're going to hurt a whole lot of other people in the process. Is that what you really want? Link to comment
NKP Posted February 21, 2006 Share Posted February 21, 2006 i also lost my dad he killed himself and sincehe did that my family has been all over the place since then too. i planed to kill myself today aswell but then i reliesed that i could never put all the people i love in so much pain, if you realli do love your family and friends you would stay and try recover for them, please stay, dont do it please Link to comment
NKP Posted February 21, 2006 Share Posted February 21, 2006 hey hun are you still alive, reply please we all want to help you ok Link to comment
KissMe_KillMe Posted February 21, 2006 Share Posted February 21, 2006 i highly doubt she did most poeple who tell other what they are going to do is just a cry out for help.. and if she does end her life i feel sorry that she feels thats the only way out! Link to comment
friendsforlife Posted February 21, 2006 Author Share Posted February 21, 2006 yes i am still here, i chicken out Link to comment
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