I can't go on without him, how do I get him back?

[AmeNM]

Okay here is the situation, my boyfriend (ex now) kept accussing me of cheating on him, and I wasn't! He stayed at my apartment one day when I went to work and went through all my stuff! I had a box full of crap I don't use or even look at, but he didn't like what he saw in there! There were condoms in there that I was given a long time ago by my OBGYN! I just recently moved to that apartment, so when I moved out of my parents house I just throw everything in a box, don't thinking I was going to be in a very serious relationship! He thinks those condoms are for a specific person and won't listen to a word I say! No I would like some male opinions on what to do! I love him w/ all my heart and am miserable without him! PLEASE HELP!

[segagirl]

Hi before I reply, can you tell me if this is the current boyfriend you discussed in the post from earlier today?

[kdreger]

Nothing is more unattractive then jealousy to the point that it's beyond reason. You have to remember though that the reason he is jealous is because he is insecure in the relationship or with himself. Nothing you can do about that. He'll find reasons to be jealous in anything. If a guy ever calls there (even if he's calling to sell you something) your boyfriend will react. Some poor SOB could be calling to sell you hand lotion and get the third degree from your guy.

 

Trust me, if he doesn't change, you'll get sick of it and him. It just gets exhausting after awhile. You just get tired of the emotional ups and downs.

 

What you might want to do is take the "insulted" stance. If he implies something tell him that you're insulted that he could think that. You have to be tough with him because he's not going to clue in otherwise. Show him the door and tell him that you care about him but you need a relationship based on trust. If he can't trust you then you might as well leave.

[raggamuffin]

Why on earth would you put up with someone going through your private things. I know couples dont generally hide things from eachother but there is a limit. He should trust you enough not to go through all of your stuff. It will only get worse though, the more you let it go on the worse it will get. My advice would be to break up with him because if hes jealous about small things imagine the big IMPORTANT things and how he might react.

[Versa]

Hi there, I know about long distance relationships as I have done it twice before. Because of the long distance thing I also know about trusting my other half, sometimes it is hard but one thing that kept me from doing (or saying anything stupid) was "With out trust you don't have anything" If I couldn't trust my girl friend then there was no point to the relationship.

 

This is just me, but it may be angle you haven't thought of before...

 

Good luck with your situation, and just remember sometimes you have to look after yourself before others.