Girlfriend and I don't talk as much.

[rong]

I feel really bad. we have been togeather for almost a year. She has done so much for me but when it comes to talking it seems like I have nothing to say. We go to the same college and we spend most of our time togeather. So everything we experience is usually togeather. I can't talk to her about what happened during the day because its either class which is pretty mundane or the time that we have already spent together. Alas I am stuck here watching her do the crossword and not saying a word. Its like we have nothing to talk about. She is the one usually talking and it makes this realationship almost one sided. I want to contribute but I really don't have much to say. What am I to do? What am I to talk about?

She get angry and me afterwards because I didn't say anything while she was just sitting there.

[DN]

Try doing things together - the crossword for example, or playing games, going for a walk, other activities. That way you can have fun and the talk will flow more naturally.

[LiquidCherry]

You could talk to her about something interesting that you learned in class or something funny that happened. Or snuggle up and take a shot at that crossword with her. But you don't always have to have a conversation to enjoy spending time with someone. Sometimes just having the company is nice.

[NJRon]

In my relationships when this has happened, it has been the result of me not pursuing my own interests. Spending too much time together and not enough time apart doing our own thing. Not that we should avoid each other, but it's important that I have separate interests that I value.

[RayKay]

Maybe it's time to not only do some things together - like take a dance class or work out together, but also pursue some activities separate - be it with friends, or joining a intramural team or training club, art class, or something.

 

It's great to do things together, but having your own separate passions also brings more to the relationship as well in it makes you more well rounded, interdependent (rather then codependent) and you can learn from one another.

 

Right now it sounds like you are stuck in a routine and very dependent on one another. Some "quiet" is normal, to just be able to sit and do your own thing (reading/crosswords) without talking, but it should feel like a comfortable silence, rather then one that is there as there is nothing to talk about.

 

As my boyfriend said, we have enough "sames" and common interests to have fun together and enough "differences" and different interests to learn from one another and keep things interesting.