Why am i still infatuated by him?

[Karibo]

Have you ever been infatuated with someone who you know is totally no good for you, but nonetheless you keep thinking about them over and over?

 

Me and this guy have had flirtations for over two years and sometimes we have ended back at his house and have gona all the way, but I know that he is not right for me. I know I do not even think he is a nice guy at times, but nonetheless I keep fantasising about him, dreaming about seeing him again as we seem to both be EXTREMELY attracted to each other. There was a time (before I really knew him) where i did think he was smeone special, but know I know for sure he is not. I have been trying to avoid where he hangs out because I cannot seem to get past him. it seems that my mind knows for sure that he is definetly not suitable for me, but my heart daydreams and fantasises about him and my body wants him. It's extremely frustrating and sometimes very upsetting because I just wanna forget about him, but whenever I see him the attraction is still extremely strong from both sides and I can feel the sparks from the other side of the room!

 

Why do I still feel infatuated by him, even though i know he is not right for me and sometimes think he's not a very nice guy?

[teacup]

i've been asking myself the same questions.

 

i should be running like hell in the opposite direction.

[ravens_folly]

That happens!

I know I was workong for a guy that was sexually harassing me and had a girlfriend, but for some reason I still liked him...

when I quit there I felt like talking to him and wanting him and wanting to go back, but then I just thought about all the bad things and how it just wasn't worth it. and how stupid it was to think like that. It happens just the same though... its just we are longing for something that we just don't have any maybe they have it, but logically we know they don't!!!!!!!!

 

It just takes time, its like an addiction. Best way to quit is cold turkey!

[Lady Bugg]

It's called "chemistry"....some people just have it..other people don't.

Sex is a powerful addiction. When you relate to someone in a very primal way...and it's GOOD..it can be VERY hard to let it go. Namely because finding someone else you have that intense attraction for is not easy. I have felt that for maybe 2 men in my life. I think many people stay in unhealthy relationships way too long simply because the sex is good..NOT because the rest of the relationship is good..or right.

 

Finding that perfect combo of both is also hard....so a lot of people figure they'll stick with what's giving them the most sstisfaction. The sex.

 

I know your frustration..but I agree with the last poster....it's like any other addiction. Cold turkey is the best remedy ....

[Kyoshiro Ogari]

This discourages me, it lets me know that nice guys have no shot vs. powerful attraction. I've experienced it and see it, there comes a guy who is just right for the girl, but then there is another guy where the attraction is so powerful that nothing can stop it except a nice trip to Siberia. The sad thing is, attraction can be so powerful that it destroys logic and common sense. There is nothing abnormal about it, it is just a powerful feeling that you have to try to conquer... if you really want to.

[Karibo]

Lol cold turkey hasn't really worked so far as I have been avoiding the club where I keep bumping into this guy, only to have him show up at the new one i've been going to!