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So let me catch you up.. I was with my ex for 5 years engaged to be married and all. we broke up a year ago tomarrow. Me and him started i guess you could say "seeing" each other again about a 2 months ago. everything was going great. Until he just recently got a new job and it was better paying so he decided to go out and get a new BMW and he thought he was the "man" now for having on as soon as he got it he came over and showed me the new car and then 2 days later he met this girl. I guess he is now seeing her b/c he has not called me since he got the new car or met this girl. Its been 5 days that i have not talked to him. Well about a half hour ago he called me out of the blue and asked for a friend of mine's (male) phone number,and that was it then he was like ok ill talk to you later bye... What the hell was that.. I dont get it we have been sleeping together for now 2 months and he gets a new car and a new girl and i mean nothing again.... I can take his games anymore . he has hurt me one too many times. why does he think he can keep doing this to me. what am i doing wrong that he just does not want to work things out? how do i get over this feeling that he gives me that im alway depressed and i feel like there is no reason for me to go on?

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I read another post by you, some people there suggested you NC, and you know what that would have prevented?, that you had answered the phone and very much let him know you were there when he checked on you.

 

It's not your fault he doesn't want to work things out, you can't control his mind, but see?, bad things come with good things too, yes, he's saying he doesn't want a relationship with you BUT you are seeing he exchanges you for a new car and a new girl, all too easily, what does that says about him?, what is that telling you about the kind of person he is?.

 

I understand how you feel, it seems impossible to move away from a person who has been with us for many years, we think we can forgive, we think we can just ignore the red flags all over the place, we remember the good things and think it can always be the same again, we try to be strong, we have hope, faith, and it just doesn't happen, something always puts us back into reality.

The reality is you can remain like this for years, on and off, suffering and having good times every so often, or you can decide that no matter what you won't allow this to keep happening to you.

 

In my case I was extreme, it got to a point when I decided I would rather be alone forever than to settle, and things changed incredibly, new things came and I realized the right things do happen to us if we want them to.

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He keeps on doing it to you, because you are allowing him to get away with what he's doing. He knows that you are available to him, anytime he wishes and this is likely to be why, he acts the way he does.

 

NC I reckon. Know it's hard, been there, done that and worn the t-shirt, but who wants a guy who only wants you, when he aint got nothing better to do.

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