Venturer Posted January 26, 2006 Share Posted January 26, 2006 Hey all, Before I begin, I have to say that I've (unintentionally) built up a reputation around my social circles that I'm a "nice guy"... and by the way, that certainly hasn't helped me with women. Of course, I am nice to people when there is no reason to be mad at them, but it is the LABEL that I have a problem with. I know that "girls go for bad boys" is only a half-truth, and rest assured people - I'm NOT trying to turn myself into a jerk or an a$$hole . However, I still have trouble getting rid of this "nice guy" label, which has followed me for quite a few years. In certain contexts - like when the girl is dating me - I'm prepared for this and have a nice comeback for it. But in this specific case, it doesn't even have anything to do with dating! And the worst part is, the girl made a comment in front of other people and thus made me look like a wuss. Me and my friends along with some girls were watching the NFL playoff games, and I am a Washington Redskins fan. I was saying to some guy who was sitting next to this girl: "yeah, the redskins lost to the seahawks, but it was a good hard fought game and I'm still proud of the redskins for making the playoffs this year." And the girl goes in a condescending way, "oh, you are such a nice guy for saying that." And other girls who were looking on gave her a knowing look, and looked at me like a wuss. Comment seems innocent enough, but the truth is it made my blood boil! I absolutely hate it when a girl says to me in a condescending way "you are such a nice guy", "that's so sweet of you", and "you're so nice" ... such patronizing is INSULTING and it makes me mad! I felt like calling her a b*tch and all kinds of names, but of course that won't do any good and would make a scene and look even worse. So I didn't mouth off to her or anything. I just calmly said "well what can I say, I'm a loyal fan." But I felt that was weak and she didn't get the message. So next time a girl calls me "nice", what is a good comeback that you would come up with? Men: can help give me some ideas, especially if you've experienced this? Women: I know how girls can be catty, so is there anything I can say that would make her feel as such, and at the same time would DROP the "nice nice" comments forever? Ideas welcome! PS. Advice for women - if you ever want to keep a guy who has self-respect - be it friend or lover: NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER EVER call him a "nice guy"! Link to comment
Dako Posted January 26, 2006 Share Posted January 26, 2006 That gentle curse bugs me sometimes. Link to comment
RayKay Posted January 26, 2006 Share Posted January 26, 2006 I am sorry, I can't comment on your thread as I am rooting for the Seahawks.... Tough question Venturer. I am not sure what you could come back to someone on that when they are clearly being patronizing. If someone is doing it that way, I would just ask her something along the lines of "who peed in your cornflakes this morning?". Gets the point accross she is being catty, without really giving her much to retort on...and to someone kinda outside, it would be seen as funny, rather then bitter. To her, she'll know you were calling her out on being cranky or whatever. Link to comment
Venturer Posted January 26, 2006 Author Share Posted January 26, 2006 Nice one, Raykay... everyone, let's keep the comebacks coming! I can tell this is gonna be fun! Link to comment
Dako Posted January 26, 2006 Share Posted January 26, 2006 You don't sweat much, considering! Link to comment
DN Posted January 26, 2006 Share Posted January 26, 2006 Keep a deadpan expression on your face, look into her eyes for about five seconds, look her up and down (without concentrating on her chest!!), and then deliberately turn away and talk to someone else. Link to comment
Derek Posted January 26, 2006 Share Posted January 26, 2006 choices like sarcasm... "yeah I'm a *nice* guy" ... rolls eyes... self-deprecation person... "it's true, I am a nice guy, but yet you love me!" Don't have good answers really. You are who you are until you change I guess. Link to comment
Venturer Posted January 26, 2006 Author Share Posted January 26, 2006 Derek: You are who you are until you change I guess. True true. I am changing, indeed, though... with much mental and physical effort. The NEXT girl who calls me a nice guy is in for a REAL surprise. *evil laughter* Link to comment
Pressfit Posted January 26, 2006 Share Posted January 26, 2006 How about..."And you're not." Or... "I thought you were." There's probably not a whole lot to say as a retort to something like this and it's really not worthwhile. About all I would have to do in a case like this is shoot a glance at them with my eyes. Sounds to me more as an vain attempt to keep you in that particular place within the 'pecking order' of the group. Because you have built a place within it from past behavior. And now they see you're trying to change. Link to comment
Venturer Posted January 26, 2006 Author Share Posted January 26, 2006 Pressfit: "And you're not" That's an awesome comeback... yet so simple.. why didnt I think of it! I might actually use this one... and if she gets snappy or something, I'll then use Raykay's Link to comment
Mattie Posted January 26, 2006 Share Posted January 26, 2006 I know EXACTLY what you mean. It is VERY annoying. It depends on the girl I'm with and the situation, but I often make a joke and say: "The last girl didn't say that...(pause)...then again, I did shoot her." Link to comment
ravens_folly Posted January 26, 2006 Share Posted January 26, 2006 If they said something like that like " your so nice for saying that' and being all condescending, just saying somehting and say it right egoistically " yeah I know, aren't I though?' and then give a little laugh like you know it... haha and give a great big grin. that would surely piss them off. Link to comment
Relationship Coach Posted January 27, 2006 Share Posted January 27, 2006 I would respond to "you're such a nice guy" with "I know, even though I'm surrounded by mean and nasty people I still manage to remain true to myself." Link to comment
hosswhispra Posted January 27, 2006 Share Posted January 27, 2006 Venturer, I actually like nice guys, seriously...I always wonder where they are and I wish I could find 'me' one. However, I know what you mean--People always say to me: "You're so nice,"or how about this one: Why are you so nice??? That one pisses me off more. But then I look at it this way---at least they're not telling me: You're such a b*tch... hosswhispra Link to comment
Venturer Posted January 27, 2006 Author Share Posted January 27, 2006 hosswhispra, you too?! gosh, I think we might be made for each other! Link to comment
shelbymustang_fan Posted January 27, 2006 Share Posted January 27, 2006 Hey Venturer, I've been in that boat before. Next time I think I'll respond by being extra nice..."Aww, thats so sweet, its the nicest thing anybody's ever said to me." .... and say it dead-seriously with a great big smile. It should really p*ss her off. You are who you are. I was not raised to be an A**, so I'm not about to become one. Link to comment
nikki blu Posted January 27, 2006 Share Posted January 27, 2006 Shake your head side to side and look at her with pity, "Wow...and I really thought you had good taste" Walk away... Link to comment
LotusFlower Posted January 27, 2006 Share Posted January 27, 2006 how about..."right...my ex didn't think i was so nice when i burried her in the backyard"...or..."and I see your a horrible judge of character" or for the nice guy who is really a nice guy... "well, when you want to have a family and your stranded on teh street in your leathers when some long haired manly A-hole left you, you'll remember how nice I am" or..."Yeah, my mother raised me right, didn't yours?" Link to comment
Venturer Posted January 27, 2006 Author Share Posted January 27, 2006 "Yeah, my mother raised me right, didn't yours?" YEOW! That one is NITRO! Link to comment
ComputerGuy Posted February 4, 2006 Share Posted February 4, 2006 Shake your head side to side and look at her with pity, "Wow...and I really thought you had good taste" Walk away... I like this one Link to comment
wlfpack81 Posted February 4, 2006 Share Posted February 4, 2006 Sad that it's to the point we have to find a comeback when someone says you're too nice Link to comment
jurupa Posted February 5, 2006 Share Posted February 5, 2006 I know this a smartass comeback, but it should throw any girl for a loop: And your such a nice girl Say it sarcasticly and strech out the "such" some. You can add things to it, like: "And your such a nice girl I am sure your mom raised you right" or "Your such a nice girl you should buy me a drink since your all so nice". remember its how you say your comeback that does the damage and not the words that you nesseccarry use, that make the comeback good. But I did like this one a lot tho: "Yeah, my mother raised me right, didn't yours?" Or you can reply to the girl that said your "too nice" with a big sarcastic "thank you". You can say "I love you too" when the girl says it, that should get her as well. I know I am evil, but I tend to be a smartass and like to get girls off their guard. Link to comment
traz Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 "lol, I'm not a nice guy, you're just a b*tch Link to comment
Bethany Posted February 8, 2006 Share Posted February 8, 2006 "lol, I'm not a nice guy, you're just a b*tch lol I like it Link to comment
PrettyBoy Posted February 14, 2006 Share Posted February 14, 2006 Traz is absolutely right, ive been there - it works seriously ... "Well ... your a b*tch." really works. I have been there; I'm not being a jerk, I am just saying, and thats what you'll be doing. Don't say it like an a*ss just very 'matter of factly'. Im telling you if you do this most of the people there (including her if she has a good sense of humor) will laugh. It's a nice comback but besides that it shows your funny and assertive. So now you'll be the "funny assertive nice guy" - Women seem to like that Link to comment
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