am i wrong to think the way im thinking?

[hcochick]

ok so me and my boyfriend went through the whole pregnancy scare. and now i cant help myself but think of how i would really like to have a baby with him at some point in our lives. well he is 19 and im 16 and totally not ready at this age. we are so in love so i know that we will have a lasting relationship. he doesnt like kids. im hoping he will get over this. but is it wrong for me to be having day dreams about us having a baby together?

[Shadows Light]

You are menstrating... that means nature is taking its course. While you are menstrating... the rest of your body will be preparing you, or encouraging you to "procreate".

 

So, Yes... its perfectly natural for you to DAY-DREAM of having babies.

 

But then again.. I day dream of winning the lottery and what I'd do with my winnings. Yeah.. ok lofty ambition and wishful thinking.

 

I also day dreamed of the day I'd graduate from college and what it would feel like to walk accross that stage. I set a goal... and through trial and tribulation attained it. Took some doing. Went through the process. Finsihed highschool.. and then moved on to college. Wasn't as straight and narrow of a plan that I took.. many twists and turns... a bumpy uphill struggle. But I did it.

 

Having a baby. Yes. Very normal for you to wish.. to day dream. But at the same time, very carefully think... of all the things you need to put in place to raise that child. You need to create and safe/secure environment for it to grow in. That means you will have to find a good paying job that will be able to support not only you..but a child.

 

Dreaming about the 2.5 kids, loving husband, with the 3 bedroom white picket fence Ranch home in Suburbia, the mini-van, excellent careers is GREAT GOAL setting.

 

Now you just have to start day dreaming about the process/path you will take to get there.

 

 

By the way.... I am happy that it was only a pregnancy scare. You aren't ready for that yet. Make sure you find appropriate contraceptive measures so that you can minimize these stressful times.

[darkblue]

One day, you may well find yourself with suitable financial and social circumstances, which allow you to have children.

You are too young just now. And though it is healthy, and normal to day-dream - let your future be your priority.

 

Make sure you get where you want to be, before reproducing new life; with better chances, and everything you can give them.

 

Take care.

[StarBrite]

Oh hun, sadly the others are right. It's a great thought to be a mommy and daddy, a family. But the sad part is, things are almost never how you imagine. And life is far from perfect. My boyfriend is 17, and I'm 20. We have a son. After I got pregnant he went through alot of changes(he was 16 at the time). And then after our baby was born, he went through even more and still is. Parenthood to me feels like you completely lose control of what you originally thought life was. Bills stack up, theres a lot of late nights with no sleep, and alot more love you have to dish out. The hardest part for us right now is because he's still in school and that puts a damper on things. On the other hand, he also works two part time jobs and I work a full time one just to try and make ends me. (Thank goodness it's christmas time!)

 

Anyway. You're definitely not wrong to think about it. At least you're working up to being prepared. But think about how much better it'd be if you were older, married, good jobs. And most importantly, that he wants kids too. Thats going to be something as a couple you're going to have to talk about and work through with your relationship and right now you have plenty of time to do it. I always tell another girl I know that wants kids, after you have one, it's not about you or your man anymore, it's about your child and will be for the rest of your life. Mostly though, have fun being a kid yourself for now. It doesn't last long.

[Young1]

 

Hey listen don't worry thats so normal to want a baby. What's there not to like in a baby. I might not be as wise as some but i say you still got years and so does he to make up both of your minds to have kids.

[the yang to the worlds yin]

he's young, i can understand him not wanting kids just yet. and the above poster was right, menstration can make you think many out of the ordinary things. but just remember, a baby's not just cute and cuddly. it takes up a LOT of time, money, resources. at your age it's just not worth it

[ShySoul]

It is perfectly natural to dream of having a baby one day. Most people dream of that. I'm a guy and I've dreamed of having my own kid for years. And you never know, it may just be with this guy. So keep having those dreams.

 

However, it is important not to rush into it. Make sure that you are ready to have a child, both financially and emotionally. Don't get so lost in the desire to have a child that you have it before you are in the right position to support it.