feeling useless

[steff]

i know i have writen about this before, but i still feel useless and totally unwanted.

 

i finished my year 12, and got my score the other day, which isnt that good, and i doubt that i will be even able to get into my tafe course, because im .5 under what is needed

 

i still dont have a job, and have handed out countless resumes, and had a number of interviews, i have one tomorrow to be a swimming teacher at my local gym. yet im doubtfull that i will get the job.

 

all my friends and family are always asking me "so when are u getting a job? why arnt u working yet? where are you working?" and it just makes me feel totally useless that i cant get a job and that no one wants to give me a chance. even though ive had private school education, i live in a good neighbourhood, im a really nice person, and really do try to work hard.

 

the guy that i like - james - hasnt contacted me in over a week, which makes me feel like he just doesnt even want a friendship with me, i have to contact all of my friends, because it seems like they dont even have the time for me...

 

i feel useless and unwanted, when ever i think about it, i cry, because i want to be a 'someone' be someone that is uselfull and can help people or at lest press two bottons to get something to work...

 

is there something about me that makes people not want to employ me? or spend time with me?

 

please help, it really is hurting me inside.

[ocrob]

I have said this once before and I will say it to you. You are so young and just starting out. Your resume can't have too much on it, but make sure that it reads well. Get help on your resume. It takes a long time to get a job and just read and get counseling on how to interview. Have a great big smile and show you are a people person. It is ok to fake it, I have done that for years. lol Learn the questions they will ask and answer with confidence. At your age, they are not asking you to fill a CEO position. Just show them that you are all about customer service and that you are motivated to learn and move forward. Turnover is so costly to businesses and they want someone that will stich around. Make it clear you will do whatever it takes to succeed and have a smile on your face. This is not rocket science and just your beginning. All that an emplyer wants at your age is someone with a good attitude. They realize you have no experience and are only concerned about having a good employee that want to grow with the business. I can't say that I am successful at this point, but I know how to interview. If you need pointers, please write me and I will be glad to give you my advice. I used to interview people and I have been hired at many companies. Let's just say I am a pro at getting hired, but not getting hired at the right companies.lol At this point, we just need to get you started. You can do it and I will help. It will be my pleasure. It's sad to say, but most interviews ask the same things and you just need to know how to answer. I will be more than happy to help you. Good luck! And always, always take the advice of a mentor. I have a great one and he has helped a lot.

 

ocrob

[acuraman]

What other kinds of jobs have you been applying to? It will take time, so don't get discouraged that you don't have a job at this moment. Don't worry about what others think of you because you don't have a job.

 

When you go in for interviews, tell them what they want to hear. Make yourself sound like you are the best candidate for that position and one last important thing, be CONFIDENT. When you have doubts about yourself during the interview, the interviewer will pick that up.

 

As with your friends situation, find new friends that will give you more attention than the ones you have now.

[registered]

is there something about me that makes people not want to employ me? or spend time with me?

In life we have to love ourselves...if we don't love who we are then this will be evident in our demeanour - body language, attitudes and actions.

Unfortunately people find it difficult to relate to people who appear downhearted, sad, lonely, disappointed.

What is more, if we pretend to put on a brave face this is just as ineffective.

 

So basically I am saying that these things are all a matter of having a positive mind and a love for yourself. We usually need these things before we get anything else.

 

Instead of feeling "useless and unwanted" you should instead feel "unutilised and free from the chains of other people".

You are just out of high school and have so much opportunity ahead. You need to be patient and cannot expect things to change immediately. It's about putting in the hard work over a long period of time and you will be rewarded.

 

even though ive had private school education, i live in a good neighbourhood, im a really nice person, and really do try to work hard.

Those things won't get you a job or anything else for that matter. It is all in your hands and is all a matter or having a positive and hopeful attitude and seizing every opportunity you are given.

 

I am glad that you have been applying for jobs - Good luck with this new one. Your time will come.

Ocrob and acuraman have offered some excellent advice, make sure you take it

 

If you need more help go back and read that other thread you started! It is full of useful advice and guidance. Make sure you go back and read it all!!!

 

Good luck and take care.

[PocoDiablo]

I think you need to go to link removed and buy a book on how to interview well. It's a skill like anything else, and you have to learn how to do it! Just pick one that is high-ranked and has a lot of good customer reviews.

 

Sidenote: It's so stupid how you go to school for 12 years and they never teach you HOW to get a job. Doh. Stupid schools!

 

If people don't want to hang out with you, there is obviously something you are doing as well. Hey, social skills are HARD! Again, go buy a book on how to be social, how to flirt, whatever. All you have to do is develop your personal skills. Yes, it takes time, but we all have to do it.

 

And of course when you hang out with people, remember to smile (as mentioned!) and talk about happy things or - better yet - ask people questions about themselves. You'll learn a lot if you ask questions.