Strip club.....really can careless

[hurtwou]

Ok well my boyfriend really loves me, he would do anything for me....He never hurt me.....Last night his friends and him went to a strip club....I trust him completely maybe a little to much...I really didnt care that he was going...is that weird or what? I mean he didnt hide it from me he told me right off the bat. I told him to be good, and I know he did. Now my question is, should I be mad over it. Im not, but I dont want him to think he can do whatever he wants, even though I wasnt mad about it this time....

[BellaDonna]

If you're not mad over it- then don't feel like you "should" be. Do what works for you as a couple. Listen to your own feelings.

 

If he makes a habit of it and it really starts to bother you- then that's a different story.

 

 

BellaDonna

[DN]

I agree with BellaDonna. There is no 'right' way to feel over this sort of thing. Whatever your feelings they are valid. So are his of course. The thing that counts is if you can find a compromise when your feelings about something are opposite to his.

[ShySoul]

Trust is vital to a relationship, and it sounds like you two have that. If you don't feel like you should be mad, then don't be mad. Follow your gut, it is usually right. If something starts to seem off, then you should be concerned and talk it over with him. But if you don't have a problem, don't try to convince yourself that there should be one. Things can be hard enough as it is without creating extra issues to deal with.

[habitual_loser]

Strip clubs are excessively lame. For some reason it's sort of a rite of passage for some people to convince all their friends to go with them to one. Drinks are expensive, nudity really isn't that big a deal, and the places stink. It's generally too loud to talk.

 

I wouldn't be worried about it unless he starts making return trips.^^

[ShySoul]

Drinks are expensive, nudity really isn't that big a deal, and the places stink. It's generally too loud to talk.

 

Don't think people go for the drinks, the smell, or to talk.

[BellaDonna]

Quote:

Drinks are expensive, nudity really isn't that big a deal, and the places stink. It's generally too loud to talk.

 

 

 

Don't think people go for the drinks, the smell, or to talk.

 

 

LOL! Yeah I must agree with ShySoul on that one.

[DN]

Drinks are expensive, nudity really isn't that big a deal, and the places stink. It's generally too loud to talk.

 

Don't think people go for the drinks, the smell, or to talk.

 

Really? I thought it was similar to the people who buy Playboy for the articles. It's not the nudity, it's the intellectual conversation one finds in such places.

[RayKay]

Why would you "be mad" if you don't feel mad?

 

For some people strip clubs are not something they mind their partner going to now and then, or occasionally, for others it is. And for others it is considered disloyal.

 

If you are okay with it, and trust him, then I don't see any reason why you "should be mad". If you DID have a problem with it though, then you should talk and communicate with him about compromises or your feelings and not "not be mad" just to be "the cool girlfriend" when it does bother you.

[Bethany]

I think it's something he wanted to experience ' just for a look'. I have been in the same position too but I went to see the Chippendales and it kind of put things in perspective.

[Vanilla]

if you're not mad- hey why worry?!

 

personally im not up for my boyfriend going to stripclubs and he isnt up for me going to them either- so thats what works for us. we discuss things we expect from eachother, what we think on porn, strip clubs, cheating etc etc. we agree on stuff.

 

as long as you two agree on things and are happy! to each their own!!

[santacruzen]

It doesn't bother me at all of my husband goes to a strip club. If he went every night it might but just an occastional outing is no big deal. It's just something fun he likes to do with the guys. Not a big deal at all. I have even been to a strip club with him and his brother before and to be completely honest, it isnt' a big deal. Those girls in there don't care a flip about anyone unless they are handing them money and even when they are getting money, then they just take the cash, smile and keep dancing and nothing else. btw, if the strip club does get your SO going, take advantage of the benefits when they get home.

[Luciana]

I wouldn't be so sure. Some girls do care about some clients, sit with them and make plans to see them after work...$$$

 

It wouldn't work for me to have my BF or husband needing to see other naked women to get his kicks. I do not want my husband to get a hard on because he is thinking of f*** someone else who is totally naked in front of them. NO thanks. Why not go the next step and join a swingers club? Then he can not only look with your approval he can also sample it....

 

But some women don't care. Whatever makes you happy.

[Boricua7]

It wouldn't work for me to have my BF or husband needing to see other naked women to get his kicks. I do not want my husband to get a hard on because he is thinking of f****** someone else who is totally naked in front of them. NO thanks.

 

This isn't necessarily true. If you were to go to a swinger's club would you be thinking about "f******" the guy that's strutting his stuff. Most women who go to swinger's clubs are there to appreciate the male form. Guys are the same. Yes, some guys are horn dogs and fantisize but NOT all of them.

 

Look, there's no reason for you to be mad. You're lucky to have someone who loves you and doesn't hide things from you. If you know there's nothing behind this, why be mad? He obviously cares about you very much so there really is nothing to worry about. Just because you were cool about him going to a strip club doesn't mean he's going to think he can get away with murder. If this is bothering you so much, tell him. You'll see that more-than-likely he went for nothing more than a good time with the boys.

[Boricua7]

It doesn't bother me at all of my husband goes to a strip club. If he went every night it might but just an occastional outing is no big deal...if the strip club does get your SO going, take advantage of the benefits when they get home.

 

I agree with santacruzen. If he goes every weekend then you should worry and be upset. Otherwise, like santacruzen said, take advantage!