How can you tell when "it's" there?

[DaXMan]

Hey everyone - I know I haven't been here all summer. Pretty much, I just wanted to clear my memory and improve myself (mainly in regard to women). I feel a lot more laid back and confident and things seem to be working.

 

Anyway, there is this one girl I've been talking to everyday lately. I won't write out the big long story on her (that may take a couple of hours lol), but I've known her for a couple years.

 

At first, we had a very "up and down"personal relationship (not dating), but last year, our connection got better. In hte middle of the year, I really thought she liked me, but said no when I asked her out (seemed unsure).

 

Nevertheless, after improving myself over the summer, me and her really hit it off. We have talked, either in person at school or on AIM virtually every day since last Sunday. I get a lot of laughs out of her and I think things are going well. However, I am unsure what the "it" sign is where you know it's going to happen. Like, if there is one, how does it hit you or how does it work?

 

I know my question may not really make sense, but I doubt every guy asks a girl out and is praying she says yes (like it's a wish), as I think some guys just know it's going to happen.

 

Any help is really appreciated.

[HellFrost666]

When "it" is there, you will know. If you have to question if it's there or not, it's probably not there.

[Caldus]

If you have to question if it's there or not, it's probably not there.

[Guarana Galrok]

I doubt every guy asks a girl out and is praying she says yes (like it's a wish)

I've never heard of a guy not doing this, maybe I'm just nieve. I know I'm always wishing.

[heloladies21]

You should be talking to lots of other girls.

[Markers]

When "it" is there, you will know. If you have to question if it's there or not, it's probably not there.

 

I wouldn't count on that, many have bad self confidence and they'll automatically assume that nobody's into them because they don't see enough attractive qualities in themselves.

 

Also, if you hang around a girl a lot and you're into her, you don't see things objectively. You count every glance she gives you, but you also count the times she's not looking at you. And obviously in class for example, a girl cannot look at you all the time (because there's the class).

 

Example: The girl's standing in a corridor, and she starts walking towards you. You hope and assume that she's coming to you because there's nobody else in the corridor, however, she says hi and smiles and even blushes but walks past you and goes through door. You assume she's not into you, because she didn't come to talk to you, which is what you expected. You don't remember what else she did, say hi, smile and blush, all because she didn't do what you expected her to do. Maybe she tried to chat you up but chickened out.

 

You gotta think hard if you want to do "is she into me or not?", and the best way to find out is to take direct approach, like asking her out.

[asdf]

i couldn't point out a number of ways to tell if she's interested, but to be honest, it's not really worth the effort to know. the real important thing is to learn how to generate and keep her interested.

 

and when it all comes down to it, be yourself, don't be afraid to show her you're interested (don't have to tell her, but don't be afraid to show her) and just don't be scared. if that doesn't work out, then you're probably not a fit.

[DaXMan]

Thanks for the advice everyone!

 

I am trying to to over-analyze anymore (old habit, but I still do it sometimes). It Homeoming wasn't coming up in a little over a month, I'd definitely be pursuing other girls.

 

 

I see what you're saying Markers, with the "expectations." Very good point. I'll see what happens with this.

[Budman]

What is "it"?

 

Do you mean attraction?

[JJRadical]

When "it" is there, you will know. If you have to question if it's there or not, it's probably not there.

+1

 

Talking to her everyday...hmmm...usually not a good sign...

 

 

...i like your use of the pronoun "it" however...you see "it" will be there...when you are "it"...you've made progress over the summer but your still relying on "strategizing"...if you had "it"...you wouldn't worry to much about her...getting girls isn't a plan or a strategy..."it's" a state of mind.