Interested in a guy who is already taken =S

[Ated]

I really like this guy. But he has a gf. A long term one too. 2.5 years... I mean, i REALLY like him... and i think that he flirts with me, but it might be just me thinking that he is flirting because i like him that much. I mean, OF COURSE i won't do anything to make him cheat or whatevr. In fact, the reason i like him a lot is he has a lot of qualities i like in a man. HE is sporty, smart, good-looking and on top of that, LOYAL. Unlucky for me, im not the girl in his life...

 

I just dunno what to do. I admit that i do flirt with him consiously. I actually feel guilty about it. BUt i cant help it. I'm at uni now. His gf is his highschool love. I DUnno... i mean... erh! i just feel bummed. He is a VERY rare gem... HARD TO FIND in deed.

 

SOmeitmes i ven think maybe i should just wait for him. But that is silly. I mean, I should let him go u know? Hes happy... why should i interfere. I just cant get him outta my head is all. I feel like im in highschool again. You know? butterflies in the stomach? heheh *sigh*

[djedix]

Actully he's not a rare find... there are plenty of guys like him. You just are obessing over him.

[Ated]

YEh and thats the thing... i dunno why... DAMMnit... I wish i didnt find him attractive i mean, why him in particualr? maybe its cos my other girlfriends think hes hot as well. MAN, i want a guy like that...

[kellbell]

Also, it boils down you always want what you can't have. I had a crush on a guy who was in a 4-year relationship. I mean there was some harmless flirting but I bartend, so I flirt with everyone. I ended up going out with another dude who was available. You might want to do the same.

[Ated]

Yeah, its weird. The thing is, i just miss the affection. I mean, i am happy with or without someone. I just wish that if i do have someone it would be like him. The thing is, he has almost everything i lookfor. The guys that i do actually wanna date are all taken (of course lol)... argh,...

[djedix]

You want what you can't have...

 

"all the guys i want are taken" You just need to look harder.. a

 

The last thing you want to do is ruin his relationship, because if you make moves on him and persue him, that's exactly what you'll be doing..

 

Only reason i'm so intrested in this is because i dated a girl who was intrested in someone that was taken, and as soon as he broke up with his g/f, she was all over him... and I was left to the dust. not fun.

[MetallicAguy]

Plus since he has a gf, that makes him more attractive to you. What is so attractive about that?

[Ated]

Djedix:

 

I KNOW how bad it would be. Thats y i feel guilty and all that. I would NEVER make him cheat or whatver. I wouldnt pursue him. I told u i feel guilty just flirting... *sigh* u know i wish i would get over it to be honest. but yeh... this guys got a hold of me. so strange! 0X

[djedix]

I think if a 'hot' enuff guy, who acted the same way, gave you attention, you'd froget about him quickly...

 

I'll go out on a limb and say that guys in relationships act diffrently... they care more... that makes them more attractive to girls who like that... then the run of the mill single guy.

[arwen]

Hey girl!

 

I was in exactly the same place over a year ago. I am sure there was this huge chemistry, he'd stare at me in secret and somehow turn even more shy around me. But he was together with his gf for 5 years. He avoided me a bit, and he and I never really got to know each other.

 

I have had relationships since, but none of them could eliminate this severe crush until two months ago. At this moment I like a co-worker, who is single, shy and kind of flirty (staring, turning back to glance at me, smiles, twinkle eyes... *sigh*).

 

I know where you are, and I know it can fade away.

 

Take care and don't drive yourself nuts over him!

 

Ilse.

[Ated]

hahahha YEh he winks at me too!! and this smirk on his face... OH! its melting!.... YEh thats the only solution i see, ME getting over it. I think i will... but yeh, i just do find it diffucult to control. Its funny cos he turns me on when he winks and smirks at me. I mean, he knows hes hot, but hes not up-himself aboiut it. I love it! I think its such a turn on... man oh man...

[cichlid]

Haha...he's in a relationship. Give it up. He probably flirts with other girls too.

[BellaDonna]

he has a gf. A long term one too. 2.5 years... I mean, i REALLY like him... and i think that he flirts with me,

 

 

he winks at me too!! and this smirk on his face

 

You've glorified him to be something better than he really is. Think about it: would you really want him if he's a flirter? Even if you could have him, you couldn't stop him from flirting with others. Being very flirtatious with other women while in a serious relationship is not necessarily a good quality in a man.

 

As other posters have said, he probably flirts with many women. He may know that you like him and it just gives him a self-esteem boost.

 

It's ok to think he's attractive and admire some qualities, but don't get too caught up.

 

Focus on people that you can have- so the admiration will be recriprocal.

 

BellaDonna