BI and doing w/o

[ctigerx4]

Where to begin? I am a 30yo bisexual woman. I discovered this my first expirience when i was 18yo. I have had many different expieriences with other woman in life. never any serious. mostly for fun and fulfillment.

I am on my 5th marriage to a man that is great to my kids and myself. But i still feel something is missing. I had my last bisexual expierience nearly 2 and a half yrs ago. my last husband didn't approve and saw it as cheating. my husband now sees it the same way. I have only had one of my marriages that approved, and didn't mind at all. he like me sharing with him. since then i have missed it. I have tried to discuss how i feel and crave being with woman on occation with my husband , but it is not a topic to discuss. it is what i call a non negotionable. I stay away from bars and drinking other than at home. to avoid any connection with woman. and i isolate myself to be sure that i will be faithful. But the desire is still there. I can't explain why, becouse i never cared to know why i liked that. i just went with it and have always been open about it.

My husband knows if i venture out w/o him while he works at night that anything could happen, and he accepts that i am that way. but has told me if he ever found that i CHEATED on him with a man or a woman he would leave me. This is very hard for me to stay faithful. mostly becouse i have cut out alot of what i enjoy to be with him. as i have done befor.

any advise could be helpful at this point. Mind you i have been remaried for less than 2 wks. been with him for 11 months now.

[segagirl]

actually its late now, and i should hold my temper here. First i am a 30 year old women, successful, respected and devoted to the people whom love me. And i have not even been married once. 5 times. holy shit. And you are looking for advice on how to control your sex drive. First i say how about having some respect for yourself and looking into some outside assistance. you are looking for something you cannot find, peace of mind, complete self-involved luxury. Ever wonder why you dont stay married long? I dont. Try at least in this case to put your lust away and show some self control. If you wanted to be with a woman, then you should have committed yourself to a woman, but you married a man..so all you're gettin is dick my friend.

[Gilgamesh]

I dont see this as a bi or lesbian issue, i see it as a simple lack of commitment issue, no different then if i was to cheat on my partner because their is this sexy secretary at the office.

 

If you dont get satisfaction from your husband, well, talk to him about it, if you arent satisfied with any man, then why marry them over and over?

[ctigerx4]

In my defence i guess i should say why i have been married so many times, I only see one out of all the last 4 as my fault.

My first husband i was 19 young and dumb, he went to prison 3 mo into the marriage for sleeping with a 12 yo girl. I had to divorce him. My second husband Whom i was devoted to beat me and drank every day. It wasn't until the last beating that landed him in the hospital and me in jail. for stabbing him that it ended, and my 3rd husband was my stupidity for being bored after 4 yrs of an open relationship and lies that i had enough.

My 4th husband cared more for drugs and a party life w/o me, and after living in my car with my kids w/o him for 2 wks i met my now husband. whom i love very much and he does satisfy me. but that don't mean the craveings arn't still there. I like to have fun and be adventurous now and then. preferably with my husband.