in order to prepare for a phone conversation with a girl

[workaholic]

Hi, I wanted to create a list for myself of things that I can do to prepare myself for any phone conversation with a girl that I'm interested in dating, or becoming friends with. Anyone is free to add on.

 

(1) Talk when I'm in a very positive state.

 

(2) Keep my vocal tone deep, like Barry White or Issac Hayes but not to deep that it sounds like a monotone.

 

(3) Show more interest in what she's been doing. Ask plenty questions.

 

(4) Talk about something that will get her talking.

 

(5) Dont' spend too long of a time talking with her..save that for when the two of us are in person. I would say 5 minutes of phone talk.

 

(6) Always end with "if you're not busy then how about we hang out at the _____________ after work?"

[OceanEyes]

Whoa! You sound like you're preparing for an important job interview or a speech. Take a step back and relax! She's probably going to be a bit nervous too, but you're going to come off sounding really corny if you seem like you're trying too hard, lol

 

Why would you want your voice to be low? Or lower than it normally is? What's wrong with being natural? She knows what you sound like in real life, don't you think she's going to wonder what's up with your voice if you change it over the phone?

[DiscipleOfChange]

Sounds pretty good man, although about length of conversation on the phone, if she's talking don't cut it short at 5 minutes. I'm not so sure about concentrating on speaking in a deep voice though. Speak as you normally would. Asking to hang out (i'd reccomend coffe or something) is a good idea. Questions are good. Don't ask too many but rather try to ask a combination of questions that ask new things and follow up questions. In general man, it sounds real good. Good luck

 

~Mark

[Jaela]

Here is what i would suggest;

 

1. Take a deep breath before dialing

 

2. Go wherever the conversation takes you ... be in the moment, and be natural

[heloladies21]

I'd write a couple of default topics down just in case you blank. Some stuff she said she's interested in previous conversations.

[Aueft]

I think you've got the right idea. However, I wouldn't try to keep my voice lower then it is outside the phone conversation, I've done this before, and it backfired. And don't try and stress out too much, take a deep breath, dial, and say what comes -naturally-. But, generally, yes, keep it short.

[Dreng3333]

Hey, those all sound like really good ideas, except for the voice thing. But you sound like you are very nervous about this. the key is to relax, you will find that everything will go alot smoother if you are calm, then you can think about what you are going to say and what questions to ask. If you are nervous there is a good chance that you will go blank and start studdering or somthing. take deep breaths, you'll do fine.

[easyguy]

All that preparation stuff goes out the window when you start talking. Believe me, the last thing you want to do is prepare yourself for a conversation like that.

 

Just be yourself, man. You'll find that the more you talk, the more relaxed you will become. I've been getting to be friends with this one girl. I called her up yesterday and we talked for like 10 minutes (more or less). I was a little nervous at first, but the more we talked, the more relaxed and calm I got... and I didn't prepare at all. I wanted to keep on talking to her but she had to go somewhere. Asking questions is big, but so is talking yourself. Really listen to what she's saying. If you're really paying attention, you can ask questions that segway into something else. Heck, you can talk for hours if you knew what you were doing.

 

She's a human being, dude. If you have to, take a deep breath and think of how small of thing this is. Later on, you'll laugh at how big of deal you're making this.

 

Break a leg!

[MetallicAguy]

Relax, your over-stressing this its not as hard as you think. I think my first time I was in your situation I had everything "planned" just like you, it's a bunch of crap. You'll definitely say something different unless your definitely stressing and make yourself say exactly that lol, or you'll just go with the flow say something natural and its even smoother then that "after work" line

[easyguy]

I've found that the most nerve-wracking part isn't the conversation, but those rings; the moments before she picks up the phone.

[Markers]

indeed easyguy, that's the worst. And that's probably the part where everything you have planned goes out of window.

 

If you prepare, you will screw up. Even if you could pull it off and say what you had planned, it will sound bad, practiced. Not good.

 

If you're unprepared, like suddenly just jump up and call her, and just let it flow.