Acquaintances and Friends.

[Third Wheel]

Hi everyone. Back-to-school-jitters, worries, etc..

 

How does an acquaintance become a friend?

 

Situation: Me and my "friends" have been sitting together at lunch, talking, laughing, throwing food, etc. for 2 years now. I live kind of far from our school, and the rest of them live closer together. I see a few of them on a daily basis, and we're I'm closer to them than the others, but I've been out of contact with them for the whole summer. Are there any ways to become better friends as a group (including the people I don't know as well)?

 

How do you know when a friend thinks of you as a friend, and not just an acquaintance?

 

Situation: I've known this one girl for a year and she seems pretty friendly with me. She's slightly crazy as well (randomly eats paper, carries around bags of marshmallows in her backpack :silly: ). I wanted to know if she actual considered me a friend, because she treats everyone the same way. She seems glad that I'm in her classes this upcoming year, but she also treats people she's never really met before the same way. I dunno, I just kind wanted to know.

[Jinx]

For me an acquaintance becomes a friend under a couple circumstances. The most obvious is that acquaintances you exist but you're not really necessary, you can sit eat and socialize with them but you're not invited to their main outings, and speaking or being together isn't considered needed but its okay if the opportunity arises.

 

Friends will also usually open themselves up further and have in depth conversations, and you can enjoy conversations with them. Acquaintances, you're there but there isn't as much in depth or emotional talks.

 

This leads to another point, friends there is a trust level developed as well. You expect certain things. See friends are the ones you want and love to talk with and do things with, acquaintances are nice to have around but you don't quite have that trust and bond down quite yet, and acquaintances come and go. They usually aren't as valued as friends. I'm not saying they're not valuable at all, I'm just saying usually you can chatter and be together but the togetherness and chat is limited.

 

For me and my acquaintances we accept each other. We talk but nothing emotional or in depth unless its an absolute crisis feeling and no one else is there to listen or tell. We don't feel obligated to invite them to outings though it can be nice to do at times. These are people that again are there but you don't have the same trust and bonding that you do with friends. A lot of times you will notice when one wants to become a friend. More talk, more trust, more outings, more time and effort to be with one another, its not so much a - Maybe if I feel like it but if not thats okay anyways matter.

 

Now to my point to become closer to people, encourage talking and getting to know them closer. People that are my friends now, after leading a few talks about ourselves and life you have a higher notch on knowing the person. Planning group outings or pair outings to somewhere you both want to be. Socialize when possible. Spend time when possible. It is about being close and learning about one another.