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i cant shake these feelings

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i hope this is in the right forum. i also hope i dont bore anyone to death.


alittle backround about me. im a 28 yearold male whos been single for about 2 years. i havent dated since the "ex", i havent even been interested in dating to be honest. after she bailed i was left a pile of insicurities about myself. since the pile was left and the fire was started

ive been feeding it ever since. although girls have crossed my path i always had the thought in my head that i wasnt good enough or why would they be interested in me? some may very well have been. ive never been a "go get em" type of guy. yet the guy who kinda just sits back and observes. although ive been told im "attractive" i never feel it.

all my past girlfirends have been very attractive women or should i say "they fit my prototype". its always been a case of who approached me. im just very unsure of how to approach a women. on to my other issues that certainly involve all the above.


july 4th. got the call from acouple buddies to come over to a party in town. showered up and put some clothes on and off i went. i get there......and almost imdeiatly find my self making eye contact with a girl i had never seen before. i asked my friend who it was after alittle while.

come to find out its a friend of his fiances. she came to the party with them.

she introduced herself later in the night with a handshake. i found her to be amazingly beautiful. the night went on and we just got closer. it was an immediate attraction for me and i hope i can believe when she tells me it was the same for her. we ended the night with a wonderful kissing session that was about as intimate as can be. we talked alittle, kissed alittle more and she left for the night. i laid in bed hardly able to sleep.

i felt the girl ive been waiting for just entered my life. i was like a kid in a candy store. i did receive her phone number. we two days later.

she told me how wonderfull she thought i was, i told her the same.

she also told me she was sorta in the tailends of a 6 year long relationship. she also told me that what happened lastnight happened for a reason.....she felt swepped off her feet and didnt feel any regret at all.

we have talked. we saw eachother this pastweekend again. basically spent the hole day/night together at a friends house opening party.

the night ended the very same way. i was left heart pounding wondering if this was the girl. ive since found out that she is really braking it off with this other guy. we have talked since and again all i wanted to tell her was how i felt about her. she told me straight out that she doesnt want anything from her 6year relationship to cloud what might become of ours.

she also told me that i am not the reason why she is finally breaking it off. she says they just have become to differant people over the years and they just want differant things in life. i dont know him and have never met him. i have known her for about 2 weeks.


i feel guilty, scared, nervous, sceptical and just about everyother emotion a unconfident guy can feel. what if this backfires??!!!!

seriously i am riding this rollercoaster of what if's, what hows, what whens.

im nervous she may not like "me" once she gets to know me. i never inteneded to "help" break a breaking relationship. i would hate for her to find "qualities" about me she may not like......or eventually not like. i suppose in the end thats what happened to most my ex's.

i cant believe i can be so happy but yet feel so many other emotions about meeting a girl.


thanks anyone who read this long post. if anyone has been there. or has an answer or advice. i would really appreciate it.

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Personally, I am not down with taking another man's girl, but whats done is done.


Proceed with caution. If she could date someone for 6 years and cheat on them him with a guy she just met, she can easily do the same to you. I also dont buy that crap about her not dumping him for you.

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be careful and take it slow!!


Dont give her everything at once, get to know her a bit more...


Being with someone for six yrs is a loong time, and Im surprised she wants to jump into another relationship that soon!

Id be very skeptical.


Trust me, Im speaking from experience: I met this guy couple yrs ago, when I met him, he broke up with his gf of 5 yrs about a week before. We liked eachother ALOT and spend ALOT of time together, got really close, fell in love etc. About a yr and a half later he kinda started drifting away, and things just kinda changed between us, later on he broke up with me because he wanted to be on his own since he has never really been single.


Im just saying that girls are weird, we want our freedom but at the same time security of a relationship. Dont fall for her, close your heart for at least couple months or so, let her do her own thing and let her know that you dont wnat her to jump into a relationship cuz it WILL backfire, trust me.


Im happy though, that you have found a girl that you really really like, so keep in touch, but try to make it a more of a friendship level first for a while before you jump into a commitment.

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