Runaway BF

[angelheart]

i'm in a very confuse relationship right now. Im here in a US base where I met my american boyfriend who is 4 years younger than me. I'm 29, from thailand, single mom and its been six mo. thats we've been dating. he is in the military and im just working a contrator co. We have a very nice time together but when he started to have friends, he started to spend more time with them than me. He invited me to go out with his buddies to hang out but there are many times that i let him do his things with them without me. Reason that i refuse to go out with them is that, I cannot relate to their topics. I can understand what they are saying but can't socialize with them and they are not talking to me either. Im still in the stage of adjusting to his culture and lifestyle. He is not inviting me out anymore, nor spend time with him. I invited him to go out but he cannot make it, cause he is hanging out with his friends. I have talked to him conflicts happening to our relationship and we compromise but still he fails. School class came,we just see each other only at school 2 times a week for 2 hours. After that no more calls or emails. Now i'm sick and tired of whats happening to our relationship and he knows it. I used to be the one dumping him, now i know he wants to dumped me cause he emailed me and wants to talk to me in person, it is obviously he wants to breakup with me. I'am waiting for him to do that but he chickened out and doesn't pursue on talking about the email he wrote. He doesn't go to class once i asked about the email or about talking. He doesn't call or email me. But when he sees me as if nothing is wrong. When I asked him about to talk it will took him a week to see me or email me. The reason I'm waiting for him to end it up, is to ask him why he wants to end it up? Is it he has no more feeling for me? I want to know his reasons and tell it directly to my face. I even hunt him to have a talk but he is not always in his room. I cannot catch him. WHY IS HE AFRAID TO TALK? It's hard for me to move on seeing him in school and not ending this up officially. Please I need ur advise.

[DN]

What do want from him? If you could have the relationship with him that you wanted what would that be?

[kariphyve]

you should go to him when you see him in class and ask him why he isnt talking to you. then you can just tell him how you feel and have it be over with, or continue

[Riley]

he's banging another chick.

[marijo2480]

Why would you want to be with someone that you don't have a good relationship with, much less good chemistry? If you've felt like dumping him before, and now the tables have turned, why don't you just let it be and move on to someone else?

 

Is it the pride, that he doesn't want you anymore, that keeps you wanting him now? This happens to a lot of people, and I don't understand it.

 

My advice to you, move on! I'm sure he's probably doing the same already, or will be soon enough anyway.

[Opiate]

Well, the problem is the fact that he is scared to break up with you because he knows that you will be emotionally crushed. He dosent want to break your heart but he also dosent want to be with you anymore. When he says he is going out with his friends, ask him where he is going and then wherever he says he is going, go there and actually see if he is over there. If he isnt then most likley he is seeing another woman. You might like or even love him but you dont deserve what he is doing to you. I would say screw it and break up with him, there are plenty more people out there. Remember there is more than just one guy that can give you a world of happyness.

[phishgirl]

I agree with Opiate. It's likely he met someone else when he was spending all that time with his friends. Even if he hasn't, it's time to move on. From your observances of how your boyfriend is behaving, he sounds like he's not ready for a committed relationship with you. And you don't deserve the cold shoulder from him, either. Continue searching for other men to date, and keep him on sidelines, if you're still interested in him. Who knows, maybe he likes the chase, and as he matures more, he'll know that although you're still interested, you're not waiting around for him. Keep your thoughts on school and others that you meet, and address his phone calls when you feel strong enough to accept his indifference. He'll notice the change within yourself, which may draw him back in the end as you venture out on your own.