Your perception on reality versus the real world...

[Borashi]

Do you ever feel like your perception of reality differs greatly from what is real? At times I feel quite distant from everyone and everything. Socially I have a very hard time without being self conscious of myself. I'm always aiming to please everyone and when I can't (get there respect) in my mind, I fail and it just lowers my self esteem to an unhealthy level. At times I tell myself to relax, be calm, but it seems so hard to stay focused in this very moment in the present without my thoughts wandering on the past or future. I definitely feel like I need help, but I really don't know where to turn to. I also can't seem to stay consistent with any new hobby I undertake, for example last week I decided to join a gym to fight depression, anxiety, and cope with all the healthy benefits I'd get from it, but I only went twice last week. I seem to be holding myself back to a point where I fear if I keep up at the pace I'm going, I'll have so many regrets when I'm older I'll never be able to reverse the effects it'll have on my life and self esteem.

[crazyjb1189]

i sometimes feel like that, but you just have to focus on reality, and dont regret anything. Rent says it best "forget regret, or life is yours to miss" just do what you feel, and dont worry about it.

[frozenblaze]

You do have a point. In fact as time passes more people must feel like you do. Our society is filled with choices and people who dont even act as if loyalty or friendship do matter. I dont personnally think I feel as you do but then there are some times when I feel like if my mind is floating above my body while I watch my life passing in front of me. People talk and then I dont really seem to understand anything. I talk and my voice ends in a silent breath. Nothing feels like the reality and the real thing is too much pain to behold. But then some people try to be happy and change their lifes with groups like the NA or AA (some of my friends are in those associations). But then if you dont believe in changing your life by assuming that you are powerless over your destiny, there is no reason to go in those groups (that is my case, powerlessness is lame for me). I dont work out and it sure be a good thing for me since sport has never been part of my life but then i'm sober since 2 months and I begin to think that it is quite a good thing to do for the mental health part. I dont think the problem is inside, the real problem is from the outside world. Those people are causing pain and beat up the child inside of us. The whole world is uncaring, cold and egoistical, there is no reason for you to think that the problem is inside. Yeah people try to prevent suicide with psychotherapy but then if the world does not change more and more people will try to end it for good. I think that the best thing to do is to understand how bad the reality and the people are nowaday and then try to live above it by being yourself with your values and personal ethics. If they dont fit with the rest of the world that is not your problem, the only truth lies in what you think and it is the only thing that can be true for you. No religious book, no philosophy will ever help you as long as you do not personally adhere to it's teaching fully... Just be yourself and make your actions speak for your thoughts. Being noble at heart is not like being friendly with everyone and accepting the pain that life brings. Being noble at heart is to believe in yourself and in your personal moral code...