Seeking Advice: Dealing with Relationship Challenges and Struggles

[NorseGypsy]

For context: I know I ruined any chances at dating her; when we were still in high school, I asked her out and didn't get an answer. Should've taken the hint. (I did not) Instead, when I went on vacation I said something really cringey: "If you dont tell me now, I might die in a plane crash!" I hate thinking about that, she ended up saying no (for good reason, jesus christ). I asked if we could still be friends, she said "Yes, of course."

We still hang out, in fact we just went camping with a few other friends this past week. I thought I was finally getting over her, I was moving on, but we were bunking in a tent, and we were up late at night talking to each other. Then it hit me like a ton of bricks; I still like her. I know she doesn't like me back, I know there's no chance. I know Im stupid. Then on the ride back home, love songs were playing continuously, then I went to work and overheard my coworkers talk about their love life going great, then I had a mental breakdown at work. I know Im dumb and stupid and dont matter to anyone, I just wish my brain would shut up sometimes. Idk what to do anymore, it has not been a good week for me.

[Wiseman2]

Sorry you're disappointed. Start dating other girls. This one is leading you on if she knows you want to date, but friendzones you.  Don't beat yourself up. Just move on to other girls.

[Batya33]

I can relate and many others can too -unrequited crushes/love etc. It's not fair and it does happen and very often over time it fades.  For now I'd avoid situations where you are in close contact with her so you can get space and time.  

Coworkers will talk, people will talk - the path of comparison is a dangerous one.  You have no idea what goes on behind closed doors.  Some are truly happy, some are truly not, and then a huge gray area.

I'm sorry you're upset and disappointed.  Get busy as Wiseman suggested. I agree.

[Big Stan]

10 hours ago, Wiseman2 said:

Sorry you're disappointed. Start dating other girls. This one is leading you on if she knows you want to date, but friendzones you.  Don't beat yourself up. Just move on to other girls.

I disagree with her leading him on. She told him no in what sounds like very clear terms. He suggest friends after and there’s no reason she shouldn’t take him at his word. 
 

It’s not like he asked her out and she gave a “maybe someday” or left the door open in the future type answer.  She told him she was not interested and now it’s on him to accept that answer or move on if he cannot shut his own feelings off  

 

No one is really in the wrong or in the right here, it’s not about that.  OP cannot help the way he feels but neither can she.  He needs to decide for himself if he can get over his feelings and enjoy a friendship or if he needs to move on.  My advice to him is move on, it’s pretty clear his feelings for this girl are still lingering.  I don’t really believe in the friend zone as a concept anyways, no one puts you there but you.  
 

If you like someone make it clear you like them and ask them out  shoot your shot and respect the answer you get.  If that answer is no you cannot offer friendship in hopes they will change their mind.  That’s not fair to them and it’s not fair to you.  She is not using him she is under the impression he feels the same way she does, that they are friends.  That’s not fair to either party and she’s not in the wrong.