Please reply.. it's short, take 2 mins! thanks!!

[misery12]

Hey, I was in a relationship with my ex for 5 months, which we were really serious about each other, close to families, and such.

Anyways, she broke up with me on monday telling me that she just felt like being frineds, and we didn't talk the next day.. until after school when she sent me an email saying how badly she wanted to be friends with me,

 

because she "loves" hanging out with me. So now we're back to takling at school, I give her space though. I do my own thing, she does hers.. and then we just hook up with some friends for 15 mins or so, and chat. We are hanging out this weekend at my house while my parents are at the cottage .. about 6 of us friends. She knows I still have feelings for her, but I told her I wont let them get in the way of us having a good time, and that made her happy.. she said okay

 

I guess I am just wondering if I should ask her if there is a chance if us ever getting back together?? I was thinking about doing it this weekend when we're all hanging out. For the past 3 days I haven't even mentioned our relationship, because that would probably push her away, or feel pressured, so I have just been cool/smart/funny and a fun guy to be around, I had her and all of her friends laughing today. And she came up to me to talk, and after school said "hey" to me on MSN.

 

I was just wondering if I should just keep doing what I am doing.. and then in some time.. ask her if there's a chance.. but how long do I wait?

I dont wnat to wait too long.. because being together for the summer would be awesome.. so many fun times could be done.. and make us stronger.. what should I say to her?? and when is a good time?

P.S = we have our prom in about a week or so... 10days.. and I was thinking of asking her.. as friends, her friends think I should ask her, and she has nobody else.

Thanks a lot!

[MetallicAguy]

Don't ask her if there's a chance of getting back together with her!! It'll make her think your desperate. Which you probably are, I don't blame you I've read all of your posts and this happened pretty recent. Is this what like the 7-8th post?

[misery12]

Yeah, man it's just tough..

I am new to the dating thing, but I do know she's the one I want.

If I don't ask her.. then what do I do, besides "not asking her"

[melrich]

I wouldn't ask her either, especially when you have sort of told her that the weekend would be free of that sort of stuff.

 

I really think the weekend away may not be a great idea with her going along. You are still emotionally pretty raw and it could be a disaster waiting to happen. Why not give yourself more time before spending a weekend away with her.

[misery12]

Oh, I am pretty stable.. right now.

I am not crying or anything, I was pretty bummed out a few days ago.. but I found my inner strength, and realized I can't love someone without loving myself.

I know my boundaries, and my limits, and I think that this weekend will be a fun time. She really wants to keep going with it, and I am looking forward to it, I am not fearing my feelings, I am not going to explode if I don't tell her.

I just need some advice on when I should say something.. or will she come to me?? and how can I increase my chances of her coming to me..

I just want a second chance.. she still seems like she has feelings for me, a little bit at least, just by the way she;s acting, and it was 5 months, she cannot just forget everything in 2 days. School is coming to an end too soon, so I dont want to put it off too long, so what is your advice besides "don't ask her" what should I do???? when.. how..thanks

[MetallicAguy]

She used to like you this is recent too showing you have potential --still. Make her have a great time around you, maybe some flirting, some teasing, show her what a fun guy you are don't be nervous I think you'll do just fine. If you break up and still try to pursue a girl, it's really not going to work, if you let her come to you it's a lot easier and faster, not as much "stressing effort".

[misery12]

So, if I show her how much fun I can be.. and what she sort of lost..

and even though she broke up with me.. I can still go out and make her laugh, she will maybe be like "why did I break up with him"

or will she think "wow he's really changed now, im glad we're friends"

[melrich]

You are going to do your head in completely if you keep trying to second guess everything.

 

Just be yourself. As MetallicAguy says try and relax and have fun. Whatever you do don't try and act. She will see through it straight away and stop trying to second guess her responses.

[misery12]

Alright, I get you now

I can do it.. I just need to get my head on straight.. I was just all wound up after it all.. I am just answering all of my questins one by one.

 

Also, our semi is coming up... it's our last dance, and I want to ask her to go, she doesnt have anyone to go with, and her friends think I should go..

we used to always play cards at school.. in the cafeteria, do you think I should do something funny.. like write something on one of the cards and deal it out, making sure she gets it in her hand, and then keep playing on..like i dont know whats going on.?

and just do it in a humouros way.. so she knows im not taking it super serious, so she doesnt feel pressured.

[sandela]

I know where you're coming from...my b/f just broke up with me 4 days ago and its hurting so bad. The best thing that I have been told (although I don't know if it feels the best right now) is to have no contact. With him being away on business til Sunday is a blessing in disguise for me - I can't pick up the phone. Everyone says wait it out - you'll know one way or the other if its meant to be. Try not to be so hopeful - it screws your head too much.

[Cecelius]

Why are you hanging around with her at all? She basically said that you're not good enough to be her b/f, but you're good enough to hang around with? How will you feel when she starts dating/hooking up with other guys?

 

If you can wall your heart off enough, fine, hang with her -- but introduce yourself to her friends, use her as social proof to other girls.

[misery12]

Yeah, I guess I am just thinking, why does she want to hang out with me.. and why doesn't she just say, we're over?

She has kept me in her life.. at least.

I am not expecting a miracle, but at least I can try, right? But don't worry, I won't sacrifice my happiness for a girl, I know it's not worth it.

I will just be a fun guy, it will all fall as it may in the end.