Girlfriend has IBS, help!

[Hollyj]

27 minutes ago, Batya33 said:

I don't think I have IBS but I have stomach issues and one of my best friends has IBS so I understand about the bathroom, etc.  I also don't do rollercoasters (related to the stomach issues, sort of) and my husband does so in that way if he wants to do rollercoasters I'll come to the amusement park and now he and my son go, or he goes with his friends.  But I do my utmost not to let my digestive issues hamper our vacations.  Sometimes I don't eat the same food as him and my son, but I have natural and medicinal ways to deal with it and I'm careful not to get "hangry".  Vacations can sometimes be challenging for me food-wise but my goal is to travel and explore and make the best of it.  

This sounds like "more" than IBS issues.

It makes me nauseous thinking about a rollercoaster.   

[Rose Mosse]

Resentment is when you're unsettled and unhappy with a situation too and sometimes it's hard to realize especially if you're in denial and torn about having sympathy or empathy for someone and wanting to do the right thing (instead of torturing each other with endless debates about IBS and what the meaning of happiness is while on vacation). It's painful for both people involved. 

You may not outwardly make her feel bad for what she's going through but that resentment is simmering under the surface while you plot to end the relationship because you're not happy. It is OKAY to not be happy in a relationship. And it is okay to question it and make a decision based on whether you can resolve those issues. Don't toy around or jerk anyone around. Once that decision is made it's final.

She can't stop IBS at the push of a button or when she likes and if you feel it's inhibiting you from living your life fully or you aren't able to do what you would like to do with a partner, then end it and don't be afraid of taking that responsibility or being the one to call a spade a spade. There's no competition or medal given out for who is the most loving and understanding in an incompatible and unhappy relationship. Both end up being unhappy. Do what's right for you.

If you break up with her be honest and tactful and just be clear that you are not compatible and no longer interested. Don't leave anyone hanging or hopeful that you still see something in that person. We all have limits and it's up to us to realize what those limits are in relationships. Don't beat yourself up so much about it. Both of you will go on to live happy(ier) and more fulfilling lives without each other if it ends. You are not responsible for her happiness either if it ends. Just be honest and clear and don't go back and forth.

[Jensy]

On 3/19/2021 at 3:44 PM, Seraphim said:

I don’t use my husband as an emotional punching bag because I have IBS. I am REAL bad as I get older . I just tell him if he is driving I have to find a bathroom PRONTO as in last week. That isn’t abusing anyone. 

My gf is the opposite she tends to not be able to go to the toilet. Do you eat things knowing they will not agree with you? 

[boltnrun]

What treatment has her doctor recommended? Is she on a special diet? Has her doctor told her to drink lots of water, eats foods with fiber and take something like Miralax when she's constipated? 

[Seraphim]

1 hour ago, Jensy said:

My gf is the opposite she tends to not be able to go to the toilet. Do you eat things knowing they will not agree with you? 

I have yes because I love them. So I eat them now and again.  But sometimes it is a crapshoot you don’t know what’s going to affected you. Like I can eat a salad one day and I could eat at 53 days in a row but then the next time it could give me violent diarrhoea for days . Somethings I can normally eat sometimes don’t agree with me. And I never know when that will be.