I would like some help getting back together with my first love

[Squamates]

Yea you are right. I honestly think I am going to give it a few more months, maybe a year, date other people, then reach out if she is single. I just need to get over her first, move on. She says she wants me in her life, hopefully one day she truly will.

[SGH]

Yea you are right. I honestly think I am going to give it a few more months, maybe a year, date other people, then reach out if she is single. I just need to get over her first, move on. She says she wants me in her life, hopefully one day she truly will.

 

There's definitely a greater possibility that she will, but again, don't move forward thinking that what you do will lead to her. Don't be in a rush to date and sleep with others either. It's not fair to women who may actually be interested in you if you date them when you're completely hung up on your ex. Seeing a therapist of some kind could be helpful as well. It will give you a space to talk about your true thoughts and feelings as much as you please to someone who is bound by confidentiality. Likely, you have a lot of processing to do before you will start to feel a lot better. My guess is, though, when you do start to feel better you will feel relief you didn't embarrass yourself by chasing her or waiting around.

 

Good luck, man. One day at a time. You CAN tolerate the pain and it really does get better.

[Squamates]

Thank you I really appreciate your help. Your replies have been very eye opening, and I needed to hear them. Sometimes it just sucks to think that god slapped this person into our life only to take them away just when you were happy. At least I have learned a lot from this and can be my best person in the future.

[Squamates]

Hey you guys, its been a good while since I posted in this chat. I just have a few updates-

I did no contact for a few more months (hardest thing ever) and I saw a counselor to vent, which I think helped a lot. I keep bumping into her on campus, which was driving me nuts but I got a lot of my confidence back and I feel a lot better. Today I had a meeting for a job position (like a giant group meeting) and I got there early. She was there as well, and she waved at me and we chatted for a little while. She asked about how my semester was going and she told me she saw that I got SCUBA certified off my instagram, and she congratulated me. I added her back on snapchat and I am really tempted to text her. We were very friendly and I kinda trust myself not to it up even more. I know my heart still hurts a lot of the time seeing her talk to other boys, but I still love her to pieces, and I think being her friend for a while (not a clingy friend, mind you) might be the best way to show her I have improved, and how much I care. Any suggestions would be helpful. Is this too soon?

[Squamates]

I have been trying to let go, pretty much every day, but I just feel like sitting around trying to lose feelings isn't very productive.

[Squamates]

Update: I texted her and we texted back and forth (long messages) until she went to bed at midnight. It was AWESOME to hear from her again. I told her that she could text me tomorrow if she wanted, but if not that is fine too. no response so far but I am feeling much better.