Why does he want to cut ties with me permanently?

[larmaesh]

My ex and I carried on seeing each other on and off for a total of 9 months after breaking up

We connected even deeper during this period than when we were together however we both learnt a lot about ourselves and wants and that we wouldn’t have worked out in the long run.

He became my best friend and I was content with our friendship despite occasionally hooking up

 

Recently I went down to see him and he told me he was leaving the country in 3 days never to return and this would be our last time together. My heart sunk literally

He also said he wanted to cut ties completely never to speak again

I couldn’t understand why everything was so drastic but I had no choice but to accept his decision

 

I am still baffled as to why we can’t be friends. I did ask him in that moment why and he just shrugged saying it’s for the best. If anyone could explain his reasoning to me that would be greatly appreciated cause I am hurt.

[Annia]

Maybe he still has feelings for you or something and wants to cut ties to fully move on. When there are feelings and people want to move on from relationships, it's not possible being friends nor healthy trying to be. Respect his wishes and maybe someday in the future you two can be actual friends... but aparently now he's not ready or willing to do so.

[Hollyj]

He is doing the right thing. You guys need to move on.

[Sabrina918]

If it's not going to work out cut ties now. I know it's hard but these past 9 months are not helpful to your healing and moving on. Appreciate that time, grow from it and move on... you were fine without with before and you're even better now! Good luck!

[agent1607307371]

Most likely he's concerned that his relationship with you is going to be a problem for future relationships. You can be friends with exes if appropriate boundaries are observed. You can't be friends with exes if you're still hooking up. It makes things too confusing.

[Clio]

It sounds like he wants to make a clean start once back to his country, and leave all the past in the past. I think that you need to reconsider your definition of what a "best friend" really is. A FWB situation of nine months, no matter how intense does NOT qualify for such a title. He is being respectful of your connection though by attempting closure rather than just ghosting you once back to his country.