Ex just msged after THREE months NC

[mountaingirl]

As the title states, my ex just texted after three months of NC "Hey, I hope you had a really good Christmas and Aus has been everything you hoped it to be."

 

I met this guy living overseas. We were kinda friends but both fresh out of relationships so I guess we kind of ended up together when we really needed time apart. He also lived (and I think still does!) with his ex (they own a house together). During our time together, I was always planning on heading home and that freaked him out and he couldn't invest. After a few weeks he told me he slept with his ex so I broke things off. Then he told me he only said that because he knew if he asked me to stay I would have and that wasn't what I wanted.

 

He was always busy, lots of communication by text, he always had to win an argument, never said sorry and things mostly had to be on his terms. We didn't hang out because he lived with his ex and I didn't feel like I could organise anything because I didn't feel confident that he liked me enough to want to spend that time together.

 

So after the break up we kinda rekindled things slightly for a few months but I headed home three months ago. We tried to do long distance but that lasted two weeks. His communication was really in and out and it gave me anxiety so I freaked out and blocked him when I thought he was asleep. I unblocked him and he blocked me and it's been three months.

 

Soooo... what do I do? I like him but I guess I feel like he has some toxic tendencies and I'm trying so hard to not keep falling into my pattern. I appreciate him reaching out because I know that would have been extremely difficult for him (pride). But I don't want to start anything while he still lives with his ex. Or really, I'm starting to move on as I see how unnecessarily hard our relationship was. But I felt so comfortable and happy with him during the few times we spent together...

 

help?

[SweetGirl28]

Honestly, it's best to ignore it.

You are now long distance, so there's really no point.

Add in the fact he lives with the ex, it's a no go.

So it's said an ex BF will miss you around three months, mine have done the same time frame, lol.

You yourself said it was toxic, so best to leave the door closed.

That wasn't an invitation for a response anyway, sending a generic wish like that is him testing

you to see if he has any sort of hold over you, it isn't to rekindle anything.

Be strong and move on.

[Ziggy123]

Him reaching out to say that doesn't mean much so try not to overhink it. You could either just say thanks you too. Or just not respond.

[milly007]

I wouldn't bother responding. Maintain your NC. Going back to him will only subject you his behaviour that prompted you to break things off. I would move on and find someone better suited for you.

[mountaingirl]

Thanks for your replies :)