Question regarding social media

[my3lans]

I have gotten off Facebook while I deal with my emotions surrounding my break-up. I still have a small amount (very small) amount of hope that we might reconcile at some point down the road.

 

My question is, when I do decide to get back on, should I restrict the things he can see? I don't see us deleting each other (although he might) because we were childhood friends before we started dating. Do I let him see me happy and moving on with my life or do I keep him at arm's length wondering? He doesn't post much on it himself but I know he gets on and lurks. I have a restricted list which most of my "friends" are on meaning they can't see anything unless I change the setting on that post to public. I only allow closer friends and family to see pictures, etc.

 

Just curious as to everyone's opinion.

[charity]

So you've gotten facebook but now you want to spend time thinking about facebook?

 

Try to just remove facebook from your thoughts. As your emotions calm down and you get where you need to be then you'll know how to handle getting back on facebook.

[JA0371]

Was it a mutual breakup? Did he break up with you? It really doesn't matter... I know two years ago I went through the same thing. It hurt ME to see his life going on as usual. Now I ould care less.. And no we aren't friends anymore. Im not the sort who thinks being friends with exes is really healthy.

 

That being said.. Even if you guys DO end up reconciling, it won't be because of something posted on social media. That's shallow at best. You need to do what is best for YOU and your healing, if that means deleting FB for a while, then do it. I would honestly unfriend him if it were me ...I kept my last ex as a friend for months and it just postponed my progress. If he is someone that cares about you....he will understand.

[Wiseman2]

Yes restrict his view of your life. He knows your number.

 

Keep doing this 6925755] I only allow closer friends and family to see pictures, etc.

[firelily]

I don't think that you should make any special actions. He's an adult person and it's his choice what he wants to see and what not. If it's a problem for him to see you happy, he can always unfollow you. You don't have to decide for him, and you should care about yourself now. Besides, you will move on and be happy anyway. Is it better if he doesn't know anything about it from social media but say see you on town hand in hand with someone, with an engagement ring on your finger? He will need to go through his grief anyway, and you can't protect him from that

 

Of course, it you don't like sharing something with him for your sake, not for his, you would feel uncomfortable with him seeing something, go ahead and restrict the privacy. Your approach to this issue might change over time, both ways.

 

Also, if you're uncomfortable seeing him happy, unfollow him, if you don't like seeing him on the chat list, hide him. Do whatever works for you, no need to overthink it.

[my3lans]

no need to overthink it.

 

 

I overthink EVERYTHING! That's my problem. But you're absolutely right, all of you are. No need to worry about this right now! Thanks!

[firelily]

I overthink EVERYTHING! That's my problem.

 

Haha you're not alone!

 

I guess try to believe that everything will turn out fine, even if things suck right now between you two and it's uncomfortable. Believe that you will be happy without him and he will be happy without you. And whatever you will happen to your past friendship - your bond may disappear but it probably won't turn into resentment. Just parting ways as people who were once close.

 

All best on that way.