Girl never wants to set hard dates?

[10023711]

We're in college btw. She's younger. So i met this girl like 2-3 week ago at a bar and mentioned how she should come home with me. She pretty much knew what my intentions were that night. We just exchanged numbers. We've been out once since then, but nothing has really happened. The closest i've gotten to her is just holding her by the waist. She seems interested, but idk. I'm always the one to text first btw, but she's always responded.

 

 

This is how our recent convo went after not speaking to her for a week:

 

 

Me: Let's go down town tomorrow (down town has all of the bars and is a walking distance from campus)

Her: okay possibly. there's a party at ____ fraternity

Her: but may go downtown after

Me: Cool, we may run into each other

Her: bet bet (bet, as in "you bet that it will happen)

 

 

I haven't said anything yet. What does this mean / what should I do? She's responded the same way to another time that i asked her out, but we ended up going to the bar. Does she sound interested and did I respond the right way? I wan't going to respond at all. What should i do?

[j.man]

Try arranging a date more than 24 hours in advance. If she's wishy washy, write her off and find someone who's more interested.

[10023711]

Try arranging a date more than 24 hours in advance. If she's wishy washy, write her off and find someone who's more interested.

 

Yea, i've done the same thing with her, and she's basically given me the same response. Do you think she wanted me to attend the party with her and that's why she mentioned it? Where is her interest level from your pov? Like the second time we went out (bar), she conveyed some interest by wanting to drink water from my cup, dancing on my a little, an bar hopping. Idk if she's trying to find other dudes at that party and i'm a second option, or what.

[ScottTN]

It's difficult to say what she's thinking.

 

Maybe she has some interest in you but I swishy washy. Maybe she doesn't want to be rude and not reply to your text but not that interested. There's probably a bunch of other scenarios.

 

Bottom line - don't over think it. I've been there. Just try to set up another meet up a few days out. If she's wispy washy / vague - then write her off like the other post said.

[10023711]

It's difficult to say what she's thinking.

 

Maybe she has some interest in you but I swishy washy. Maybe she doesn't want to be rude and not reply to your text but not that interested. There's probably a bunch of other scenarios.

 

Bottom line - don't over think it. I've been there. Just try to set up another meet up a few days out. If she's wispy washy / vague - then write her off like the other post said.

 

Yea, i'm going to forget about her at some point (its gotten easier now that i have a little more experience). Also, she's a party type of girl. I don't know if this changes the scenario.

[willdation]

Id say that since it has been only a few weeks, she doesn't have super strong feelings yet as it takes time for a woman to build up... I would just reach out once a week and then ask when she is free to get together etc... set a date with just you both.... If she declines say twice without offering another date, then you can just move on and find someone else...

[abitbroken]

She already had the frat party on her radar, so she is telling you that she might go downtown after. I would ask her out more than a day in advance. And after she said there was a frat party, i would have been interested in going to the party with her, or would have said "would you like to meet me at 10 pm atXX" vs "okay, maybe i'll see you around" or i would have suggested another day.

[katrina1980]

Your invite sounded like a casual "hang out" (with you hoping for sex afterwards, which she knows), so she responded in kind.

 

If you are serious about actually dating her, then ask her out on an actual date, with a plan, not just announce "let's hang out downtown" (or whatever you said) like she's your frat buddy (or worse f*** buddy) or something.

 

In short, you want her to agree to a 'hard date" then ask her out on a "hard date."

 

Not to just hang out downtown.

[10023711]

Your invite sounded like a casual "hang out" (with you hoping for sex afterwards, which she knows), so she responded in kind.

 

If you are serious about actually dating her, then ask her out on an actual date, with a plan, not just announce "let's hang out downtown" (or whatever you said) like she's your frat buddy (or worse f*** buddy) or something.

 

In short, you want her to agree to a 'hard date" then ask her out on a "hard date."

 

Not to just hang out downtown.

 

The thing is i don't really want a serious relationship with her. I'm a senior, she's younger. Friends with benefits would be cool, but I don't want anything serious.