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Is this emotional abuse and should I still date him?


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I have dated this guy for a few months. He lives 4000 miles away from me but I have known him for four years and let myself fall for him. At first everything was great. He was a little bit hard to open up but he opened up to me and we eventually started "dating". I played Xbox a lot and because I am one of the few girls who I know play, I talked to boy. I got included in his friend group and would talk to them, but anytime he wasn't in the party he would want to be facetiming and hearing what I was saying and what they were saying. That caused a lot of fights because he constantly fought with me for talking to anyone other than him (even my girl friend), and fought with me if I was messaging anyone else.


Things were pretty bad until I flew over to meet him in July. At that time everything felt perfect except he couldn't handle me talking to his friends a lot when I met them and I went to message my mom on his phone and saw that when we were talking he was messaging another girl ( we weren't dating so I didn't go off on him, but I was a little upset). I let it go but I woke up in the middle of the night to him going through my phone!! He went back to 2014 and questioned me about things.. I just let it go and the rest of my time there was great.


Upon coming home things were good for a week and then went back to how it was before I visited if not worse. He had to know where I was at, who I was with, what I was doing, etc.. It got so bad when he got mad at me for something that I would have to block him on everything I could and he would still contact me harassing me. He would a lot of the times bring up something that i or someone else did in the past to justify what he was doing now and then apologize and swear he would change. Things that made him mad would be brought up and held against me for days and were excuses for his trust issues and insecurities.


I admit i have done some wrong by talking to his friends about my boyfriends and I situations but I had nobody else to talk to. I said personal things asking for advice and even one of his friends (the one I mainly talked to about the issues) went out of their way to message me and help me.


Anyways, i just need advice on whether to stay with him or not. I think hes emotionally abusive... I mean he got a app to call me on different numbers every time so I couldn't block him when he was harassing me. It's just a never ending cycle of him swearing to change and doing the things over and over again.


Thank you

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How is this even a question? You obviously know he is abusive and controlling and it is this bad from 4000 miles and in just a few months! Imagine LIVING with this creep. Dump him, cut off contact, and tell him you will call the police if he harasses you. Document everything and go no contact.

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