Not sure what to think of girl who is a really good friend

[Borashi]

Okay here's my situation, whenever we see each other our chemistry is explosive and we're totally into each other, but we tend to drift apart every few weeks only to come back together again, in which our feelings are once again reinforced towards one another. My biggest issue is when we don't see each other, we're both so busy, she only tends to call when she's upset or has a problem, this makes me think she's categorizing me into her "always" accessible nice guy friend. This is definitely what I don't want to be and I almost wonder if I remain unavaliable by phone or email, if she'll be even drawn closer to wanting to see me again.

 

It's so confusing, we had a huge talk last month we're we just poured each others feelings out for each other yet we both don't seem to take the time to make room for each other besides an occasional weekly phone call.

 

Part of me says move on I could do so much better if I just let go, yet part of me struggles to define what we mean to each other as it seems to vary so much from week to week.

[chai714]

Repeat exposure to her is one of the key success factors in getting someone to like you. It will lead to a greater appreciation and liking. How can you get her to want to see you more? When it comes to talking with someone else about your feelings and theirs, it's almost good to ignore what they have to say. If they really like you and are into you, they'll make time to see you. Anybody could say, "I like you." Only a person who truly likes you, will make the time to see you and spend real time with you.

 

At this point, I would doubt her words. She may or may not be seeing someone else as well, but something is keeping her from actually spending more time with you. Unless she has 2 jobs and kids, she has time to spend with you. It's a matter of you making her want to spend more time with you, and her liking you. Remember, don't be deceived by her words.

[providentielle]

I think that in the past I have made people feel the way that you feel now. When you are with someone it is so easy to let yourself go and become close but I can be insecure and within hours of leaving that person I would have convinced myself that it was all an illusion or that he didnt really like me and was just trying to be nice or wanted something from me so I wouldn't ring for ages 'cause I was sure he didn't really want to hear from me. The problem was that he wouldn't call me either because I wasn't initiating contact so he thought I didn't want to but then that just made me think more that he didn't! What I'm saying is, do you call her? She could be thinking the same as you and neither one is calling, waiting for the other to do it and then you both end up thinking that the other doesn't want to talk. Does that make sense? If you want to speak to her then call her! She will realise you want to talk and will feel like you are more available and will call more. Good luck

[DragonGirl724]

Borashi,

 

timing is everything. maybe you 2 are meant to date but nows just simply not the right time for it...its cool you 2 expressed how you feel. thats important. and as for the 'maybe time apart is better' thing...i leave you with this:

 

"Absense diminishes mediocre passions & increases great ones; as the wind blows out candles & fans fire."

 

if its real itll come back even more powerful than ever; if it wasnt meant to be...it'll simply die out. follow your heart.

 

hope that helps.

 

-DG724